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Topic: Dealing with ex boyfriend's
SexyBlondee's photo
Tue 03/25/08 10:28 AM
Recently my ex boyfriend, who i dated in high school, tried gettin ahold me these couple of weeks and on Saturday he showed up at my job. I work at Applebees as a waitress, anyways, he just shown up, and asked for me, so i thought it was my sisters or whoever that was in trouble or whatever. Instead, it was my ex bf and he sat me down and kept sayin " i tried calling u, driving by ur house (which is my parents house) and y werent u around" Igot scared cos i told him it soudns like ur stalking me he said no i want us to b together again, and grabed my hand forefully and then my boss came out and i told my boss this guy is hurting me and he just ran out. :angry: grumble ohwell so any advice will b great on what to do next.

yellowrose10's photo
Tue 03/25/08 10:30 AM
call the cops, let your manager tell him to leave, restraining orders, changing your phone #.....

Queene123's photo
Tue 03/25/08 10:31 AM
i dont understand, why did you say he was hurting you, when he wasent.. do you want him back.. and yea it does sound in some ways he was stalking you

timothyhouk's photo
Tue 03/25/08 10:31 AM
I think you may have done the trick right off the bat,have you heard from him since?

lilith401's photo
Tue 03/25/08 10:33 AM
Stop with the drama and move on.

SexyBlondee's photo
Tue 03/25/08 10:34 AM

Stop with the drama and move on.


so easy for u to say cos ur not going thru it

nightruler's photo
Tue 03/25/08 10:37 AM
I think you should tell him that you will call him and that you can at least promise him a half an hour conversation



Then try this



I know we had some both amazing and hurtful times together,but no matter what has happened..I have moved on with my life/Maybe not in a way you're probably thinking..(because men always think theres another guy)..but I am content with the way things are right now.I do appreciate that you seem to be doing okay for yourself,but I have no desir to be a part of that.I am gonna ask you to not show up at my job in the manner you did,not only was it uncalled for,but I could have lost my job over it..besides we were told to always leave our baggage at the door,and thats something I respect/I know you probably think I hate you,the fact is I don't..but I have never gone out with someone on account of pity,,,and this is no different..so I'm sorry to say this but we cannot get back together..this is the answer I am standing by..I'm not asking you to wait or to try again or even to better yourself..I'm happy with my life and I need you to follow your honor and move on as well



its just an idea sexyblondee

yellowrose10's photo
Tue 03/25/08 10:37 AM


Stop with the drama and move on.


so easy for u to say cos ur not going thru it


I don't understand why you can't think of what to do though. grabbing you is an assault and there are stalking laws and you can tell co-workers to watch out for him

there are things to do

lilith401's photo
Tue 03/25/08 10:37 AM
If you make a big deal out of it, it certainly will become one.

If you make it dramatic, it will be. Keep your eyes open and live your life. Let him know you are not interested, let your boss know he is not welcome, and tell your parents. What else do you want to hear?

nightruler's photo
Tue 03/25/08 10:39 AM
on second thought


listen to the women



cops,restraining orders..changing a bunch of ****



typical break up bull****

DebbieJT's photo
Tue 03/25/08 10:39 AM
just tell him to bugger off and leave you alone..be blunt and say it how it is

SexyBlondee's photo
Tue 03/25/08 10:40 AM
Edited by SexyBlondee on Tue 03/25/08 10:43 AM

I think you should tell him that you will call him and that you can at least promise him a half an hour conversation



Then try this



I know we had some both amazing and hurtful times together,but no matter what has happened..I have moved on with my life/Maybe not in a way you're probably thinking..(because men always think theres another guy)..but I am content with the way things are right now.I do appreciate that you seem to be doing okay for yourself,but I have no desir to be a part of that.I am gonna ask you to not show up at my job in the manner you did,not only was it uncalled for,but I could have lost my job over it..besides we were told to always leave our baggage at the door,and thats something I respect/I know you probably think I hate you,the fact is I don't..but I have never gone out with someone on account of pity,,,and this is no different..so I'm sorry to say this but we cannot get back together..this is the answer I am standing by..I'm not asking you to wait or to try again or even to better yourself..I'm happy with my life and I need you to follow your honor and move on as well




its just an idea sexyblondee


Best idea ive heard so far :wink: and thanks for not bashing me. anyone else who thinks its so easy to get rid of a problem such as this, its not but thats life i guess grumble

no photo
Tue 03/25/08 10:41 AM

I think you should tell him that you will call him and that you can at least promise him a half an hour conversation



Then try this



I know we had some both amazing and hurtful times together,but no matter what has happened..I have moved on with my life/Maybe not in a way you're probably thinking..(because men always think theres another guy)..but I am content with the way things are right now.I do appreciate that you seem to be doing okay for yourself,but I have no desir to be a part of that.I am gonna ask you to not show up at my job in the manner you did,not only was it uncalled for,but I could have lost my job over it..besides we were told to always leave our baggage at the door,and thats something I respect/I know you probably think I hate you,the fact is I don't..but I have never gone out with someone on account of pity,,,and this is no different..so I'm sorry to say this but we cannot get back together..this is the answer I am standing by..I'm not asking you to wait or to try again or even to better yourself..I'm happy with my life and I need you to follow your honor and move on as well



its just an idea sexyblondee


This is great advice!

BobbyJ's photo
Tue 03/25/08 10:43 AM
All I can say is I sure wish this "text messaging" on cell phones is just a fad. It's obviously starting to carry over into the Forums. I hate cryptic writing that you have ro read and re-read to figure out what the heck a person is trying to say. grumble

SexyBlondee's photo
Tue 03/25/08 10:44 AM


Stop with the drama and move on.


Kids and their drama. I agree. I think I smells me a drama queen.


why do u think this is so funny

lilith401's photo
Tue 03/25/08 10:44 AM

All I can say is I sure wish this "text messaging" on cell phones is just a fad. It's obviously starting to carry over into the Forums. I hate cryptic writing that you have ro read and re-read to figure out what the heck a person is trying to say. grumble


laugh Sry, wht? laugh

I totally agree with you there.

yellowrose10's photo
Tue 03/25/08 10:46 AM



Stop with the drama and move on.


Kids and their drama. I agree. I think I smells me a drama queen.


why do u think this is so funny


maybe because you can't see the other advice as well. I don't think I would give anyone that stalks me or grabs me any of my time and I wouldn't hesitiate to do something to stop it.

and the poster retacted this and said to listen to the other advice. Could you still be into this guy to want the attention? This is just a question not an attack

lilith401's photo
Tue 03/25/08 10:53 AM
Edited by lilith401 on Tue 03/25/08 10:54 AM
Yellow~ you are a sweetie but I do think there is an over-reaction here. I think there is much drama over not too much.

I think when people get defensive in this way.... that says a lot. There was no indication in the OP that there was any stalking or harrassment, just an ex who drove by her parent's house and tried to hold her hand. If you make a mountain out of a molehill~ beware of land slides.

yellowrose10's photo
Tue 03/25/08 10:55 AM

Yellow~ you are a sweetie but I do think there is an over-reaction here. I think there is much drama over not too much.

I think when people get defensive in this way.... that says a lot. There was no indication in the OP that there was any stalking or harrassment, just an ex who drove by her parent's house and tried to hold her hand. If you make a mountain out of a molehill~ beware of land slides.


I was referring to her saying he drives by her house, goes to her job and "forceably" grabbed her hand. :wink:

lilith401's photo
Tue 03/25/08 10:58 AM
Yellow~ I did not mean you were being defensive. :wink:

My point is this... this is only one of three versions to the story. And 'forcibly' could mean with passion as in please just talk to me for a minute. When I was 18 I used to drive by my ex's house...

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