Topic: Not a happy single mom.
DebbieJT's photo
Tue 03/25/08 04:11 PM
sorry but i was spanked as a child as was my parents and theres and so on..we all ended up reasonably well balanced and secure people with RESPECT for our elders and other people...unfortunatley in this pc world of smothering our kids and letting them believe the world revovles around there little bottoms kids believe they dont have to give respect but receive all...my sons had a tap on the bum, hes been disciplined when hes naughty and hes been raised to respect his elders..hes also been taught to look after himself...theres a balance..and if parents who believe in this pc rubbish cant see that then problems will occur...oh this is my opinion not meant to offend blah blah

hikerchick's photo
Tue 03/25/08 05:33 PM
I am not sure what is PC about not wantin to hit little children, but we all have our opinions. We are all trying to accomplish the same thing; we just have different ideas about how to get there.

cutelildevilsmom's photo
Tue 03/25/08 07:07 PM

This thread has brought a lot of insight to me. Since I do have a very young one, and a long road ahead I can get an idea of ways to approach situations. Thanks ladies. Hope ya'll had a wonderful Easter.flowerforyou flowerforyou

i hope you did too kitten..my son starts counseling tommorow to try and nip some problems in the bud early.He was starting to gain control of my household and i just recently started to try and turn things around.i have a long trail ahead but I know I'll turn him towards the right path.

cutelildevilsmom's photo
Tue 03/25/08 07:10 PM

sorry but i was spanked as a child as was my parents and theres and so on..we all ended up reasonably well balanced and secure people with RESPECT for our elders and other people...unfortunatley in this pc world of smothering our kids and letting them believe the world revovles around there little bottoms kids believe they dont have to give respect but receive all...my sons had a tap on the bum, hes been disciplined when hes naughty and hes been raised to respect his elders..hes also been taught to look after himself...theres a balance..and if parents who believe in this pc rubbish cant see that then problems will occur...oh this is my opinion not meant to offend blah blah

unfortunately it is illegal in some states to spank a child and even in the ones it isnt illegal .Kids know this and try and manipulate the system.

Foliel's photo
Wed 03/26/08 09:00 AM
I got spanked a few times but only if i was really bad. I turned out quite well and I don;t believe that hitting people solves anything.

My youngest sister on the other, never got spanked once, and she's a witch (trying not to call her what I would like to) I told her the other day that I hope she has kids just like her, although she'd never keep her kids. She is one of the most physically abusive people I know, except with me. She hit me once and I hit her back, she never hit me again. She hits my mom frequently, finally i told her if she hits mom again I will have her arrested for assault and battery on a handicapped person. That doesnt stop world war 3 every morning but she has stopped hitting my mom, after reading about the possible punishments for A & B of a handicapped person.

missy51970's photo
Wed 03/26/08 11:52 AM

sorry but i was spanked as a child as was my parents and theres and so on..we all ended up reasonably well balanced and secure people with RESPECT for our elders and other people...unfortunatley in this pc world of smothering our kids and letting them believe the world revovles around there little bottoms kids believe they dont have to give respect but receive all...my sons had a tap on the bum, hes been disciplined when hes naughty and hes been raised to respect his elders..hes also been taught to look after himself...theres a balance..and if parents who believe in this pc rubbish cant see that then problems will occur...oh this is my opinion not meant to offend blah blah



AMEN!!!flowerforyou

Barbiesbigsister's photo
Wed 03/26/08 01:59 PM


My youngest one was throwing his fit, doing everything that he shouldnt of been doing, I spanked his but,just once, than he being the drama king. Screaming to the top of his lungs. I tapped his cheeck, and wouldnt you know it, he screamed more.

Duct tape. Just the sight of it works on most kids.




ROTFLMAO!! got mine always within reach along with the keys to the trunk of the car!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!laugh

Barbiesbigsister's photo
Wed 03/26/08 02:08 PM


sorry but i was spanked as a child as was my parents and theres and so on..we all ended up reasonably well balanced and secure people with RESPECT for our elders and other people...unfortunatley in this pc world of smothering our kids and letting them believe the world revovles around there little bottoms kids believe they dont have to give respect but receive all...my sons had a tap on the bum, hes been disciplined when hes naughty and hes been raised to respect his elders..hes also been taught to look after himself...theres a balance..and if parents who believe in this pc rubbish cant see that then problems will occur...oh this is my opinion not meant to offend blah blah
YOU GO LILMAMA!!!drinker
unfortunately it is illegal in some states to spank a child and even in the ones it isnt illegal .Kids know this and try and manipulate the system.


and they learn it in kindergarten!!!! huh indifferent mad

Dragoness's photo
Wed 03/26/08 02:16 PM
Edited by Dragoness on Wed 03/26/08 02:17 PM
Believe it or not and this is going to sound ridiculous because the children are not babies but parenting classes are excellent. I had them too late to really help with mine but you can learn so much about the children and what works.

I was raised with the whuppins and I did the whuppins too but they did not work for my kids one bit. The harder I hit them the worse they got. So I would not recommend the hitting as a solve all, from my experience it was not the best way.

Parenting classes are really really helpful. Try them.flowerforyou

Foliel's photo
Thu 03/27/08 09:27 AM
Spanking your child really should be the absolute last resort. Only if everything else you have tried, fails. Even then if you can find an alternative punishment that works, you should.
For those that don't approve of spanking, for some people it's what works. It is not our place to tell people how to raise their children, they are raising them how they see fit, and if it works so be it. I am not against spanking but I also do not feel it should be the punishment that is used for every thing the child does wrong.

Jim519's photo
Thu 03/27/08 03:59 PM

A life of a single mom. Yet one of those days again.

My boys are 6 (kindergarden) and 7 (2nd grade). I picked them up from school, we were in a hurry. We had a wrestling meet to go to. We get to the elementary school, have to get to the bathroom, my boys need to be watched continually. My youngest one was throwing his fit, doing everything that he shouldnt of been doing, I spanked his but,just once, than he being the drama king. Screaming to the top of his lungs. I tapped his cheeck, and wouldnt you know it, he screamed more. Than some kind of lawenforcement person decided to come and intervene. Asking if everything was ok. I said yes,than my oldest son saids she slapped him across his face. OMG. Im already pissed. Than walking out I told him I did spank his butt and than he told me that,that was half the truth. What. OMG.

Than he felt the need to watch me. I felt like telling him if you can do a better job, than do it. I was so mad.

I also went to law enforcement school. In the statute it states you can use reasonable force on a child. One spanking just once is reasonable. GRRRRRRRRRRRRRrrrr.

These are the times it sucks being a single mom. Idid call the boys dads, dad (grandpa) he is a retired deputy. He told me, that it was ok and not to worry about it.

What 2 do..sad



How do you just "tap" a cheek? When I think tap, I think tapping on someones shoulder to get their attention. So I think I would be safe in assuming you did more than just a "tap"

A tap would not be effective in what your trying to accomplish. I have to agree with others in the fact that hitting a child is the wrong process..period. I have never had to spank my daughter..EVER! Never even as much as raise a hand or geto to that level....

Thankfully so, I dont believe in that anyway, I recommend guidance, there are more supportive ways to discipline a disobedient child...

wanttachat's photo
Fri 03/28/08 06:27 AM

Ok I am really not on the side of DO NOT SPANK, but I wanted to point out something I see in your statement and what I have learned ......
you stated....
I spanked his but,just once, than he being the drama king. Screaming to the top of his lungs. I tapped his cheeck, and wouldnt you know it, he screamed more."
as you see when you spanked him he screamed when you tapped him he screamed more thus it proves that he will not respond as you want him to to your actions so this is a good time to consider a new course of action. I have been here (long time ago)where I need to change my actions to get the desired response I have found that a spanking only made my son more mad and that calm talking at least stops the tantrum and he listens. True children try to read emotions of the parent and if you are stressed they can and will stress. Don't worry how others react to your kids behavior it is more important to how you react.
just a thought to consider happy

chrissylynn36's photo
Fri 03/28/08 11:08 PM
well i think i would have took him kicking and screaming since he was already doing that out of the building and took wrestling away for the night and every night till he was going to show you some respect..you have to follow threw though...my son threw a fit in the grocery store but once when i wouldnt buy him what he wanted i picked him up he was kicking and screaming and walked out of the store left the basket there and everything told the store boy i was sorry for that on my way out...lol...but you have to do it and keep doing it till he gets the message you mean buisness if you dont do it now he will keep on doing it......and as far as the hitting goes...a spanking never hurt anyone...society has made it so that the kids can rule and have the upper hand instead of the parents and that is just wrong.....its all about teaching kids respect..and if they dont have it for there own parents..they wont have it with anyone else.....

hikerchick's photo
Sat 03/29/08 05:24 AM
You teach others to respect you by respecting them.

Plain and simple.

Hitting is not a respectful thing to do.

It turns the relationship into a power struggle; and the bigger,stronger, person appears to win.

But it is a hollow victory because now you have a child who fears you but does not respect you.

cutelildevilsmom's photo
Sat 03/29/08 10:03 AM
I respectively disagree hiker.I was spanked but i had respect for my parents and yes a wee bit of fear but they could take us anywhere and we knew better than to act out.We knew what the consequences were .

hikerchick's photo
Sat 03/29/08 03:00 PM

I respectively disagree hiker.I was spanked but i had respect for my parents and yes a wee bit of fear but they could take us anywhere and we knew better than to act out.We knew what the consequences were .


people always complimented me on how well my daughter behaved in public. And her friends parents always told me that she was a joy to have at their homes. She respected them, but not because she was afraid of them. I just think that respect earned through violence is not true, heartfelt respect. I would think there would be a great deal of resentment in there too. I was spanked as a child as well and feared my parents. I got the hell out of their house as soon as I could.

cutelildevilsmom's photo
Sat 03/29/08 05:03 PM


I respectively disagree hiker.I was spanked but i had respect for my parents and yes a wee bit of fear but they could take us anywhere and we knew better than to act out.We knew what the consequences were .


people always complimented me on how well my daughter behaved in public. And her friends parents always told me that she was a joy to have at their homes. She respected them, but not because she was afraid of them. I just think that respect earned through violence is not true, heartfelt respect. I would think there would be a great deal of resentment in there too. I was spanked as a child as well and feared my parents. I got the hell out of their house as soon as I could.

Well though we may differ on this issue I'm glad we can do so without name calling or hostility.;)

no photo
Sat 03/29/08 05:12 PM
Okay I have 3 boys, ages 6 5 and 3. I don't like spanking my kids and I can count on one hand how many it has happened. I believe that if you set the standard of your household and how things are going to be ran your children will grow understanding the appropriate behavior they should have. I agree parents are too concerned with the dating scene and the next bf or gf. I don't know maybe I just got lucky. I hardly ever have to tell them something more then once. At the same time from toddlers they knew that if mom or dad said something wheather it was "If you don't stop that your going to lose....your tv time....our camping trip ect' or "We are going to go see a movie tomorrow.' I follow through with everything. Who knows might sound stupid but you kids are a whole lot smarter then people give them credit for. If they know that do you what you say no matter if its good or bad they will know that they can count on you. I don't give in if I say no, then no is no. No amount of begging or pleading will change the answer. Alot of parents are 'oh i just don't want to hear him/her cry just give them what they want to shut them up' and if you do that you can't expect them to respect or listen to you. Now if you do spank your kids understand there is a very fine line between disipline and abuse and that is where it becomes a problem. Smacking your kid in the face is not okay, can i smack you? Its disrespectful and uncalled for. A swat on the butt is diffrent. I was beaten...not spanked but beaten until I was in the hospital as a child...I turned out okay...but to this day i flinch when people raise there hands...strange huh. Do you really want you child to grow up living in fear?

hikerchick's photo
Sat 03/29/08 06:51 PM



I respectively disagree hiker.I was spanked but i had respect for my parents and yes a wee bit of fear but they could take us anywhere and we knew better than to act out.We knew what the consequences were .


people always complimented me on how well my daughter behaved in public. And her friends parents always told me that she was a joy to have at their homes. She respected them, but not because she was afraid of them. I just think that respect earned through violence is not true, heartfelt respect. I would think there would be a great deal of resentment in there too. I was spanked as a child as well and feared my parents. I got the hell out of their house as soon as I could.

Well though we may differ on this issue I'm glad we can do so without name calling or hostility.;)


oh, girlfriend I have no issues with you personally. We can disagree on issues and still respect each other's right to have a different point of view. I don't like to call people names, anyway. It reflects badly on me! Anyway, I like you and about 99% of the time, I agree 100% with you. If we agreed all the time, how boring would life be.flowerforyou

hikerchick's photo
Sat 03/29/08 06:52 PM
Thanks Rosie!flowerforyou