Topic: Why cant the state back off??
Dragoness's photo
Fri 01/11/08 09:02 AM

The state got involved because for a short time I needed some medical assistance for my son. But its been a long time since I have needed the assistance and also a long time since I have lived in that state!


It is a federal requirement to persue child support on all who apply for assistance the only exemption is food stamps. They will continue no matter what you do. He is responsible for the babies care medical, monetary, etc......

repochick's photo
Fri 01/11/08 09:04 AM
Edited by repochick on Fri 01/11/08 09:05 AM
It might ot be my choice but I dont have to help them. I have my reasons for this and it has nothing to do with the money. One thing I do know is that there wont be anything positive that comes from it!

Rosebud2669's photo
Fri 01/11/08 09:14 AM
I recieved assistance for my kids when they were babies and they are now 13 and 11. I have never seen a dime for them and I filled out all the paper work the state wanted me to fill out to get child support for them. The state system is so screwed up.

repochick's photo
Fri 01/11/08 09:19 AM
One reason I doubt I'll ever see a dime is because when I was less than 3 months pregnant my ex decided that there was no way the baby was his and that he wanted a test ran. Well, then things went from bad to worse and I left, 3 months pregnant. I told him that since he was the one with doubt he could get the test done. He has not even chosen to eve try to have it done. He also has kids with another woman he doesnt pay child support on. At least in their state, the state will back off!

Softtail70's photo
Fri 01/11/08 09:24 AM
Well Hon....
You did'nt make that baby yourself...I think they should make every father step up to the plate...Hon...there may be a time when it could come in handy. Sorry, if I am out of line here...been there, done that. I never had a problem, as I see so many young single mothers today, getting child support and it sure came in handy. My son pays support for his daughter, even though the mother took off with her to a different state. He has only seen her a few times, distance is the only factor here. There is a difference between the word..father and daddy. If this is an issue of not wanting the father to be part of the child's life....There are ways to protect you and your baby. Lol...they are all babies to me, no matter what age they are.
<<<Softtail>>>

Cutiepieforyou's photo
Fri 01/11/08 09:27 AM
The state wants to be repaid any money the paid up front. I worked in child support enforcement for threee years.

Cutiepieforyou's photo
Fri 01/11/08 09:28 AM
sorry for the spelling errors...my fingers aren't working right today

repochick's photo
Fri 01/11/08 09:29 AM
I know I didnt make him myself but since I have done everything, and I mean everything else myself I might as well have made him myself too!! Even when I was with my ex still, he wouldnt even go to the Dr appts with me. As for the danger part, I do believe we could be in danger or if nothing else, my ex might try to kidnap my son. I dont know the hassles of having to prove that to a judge!

repochick's photo
Fri 01/11/08 09:30 AM

The state wants to be repaid any money the paid up front. I worked in child support enforcement for threee years.


So, maybe you can answer this. Isnt it true that once you move to another state that state takes up the case??

Cutiepieforyou's photo
Fri 01/11/08 09:32 AM
Yes, there is something called a URESA petition that gets filed in the old state petitioning the new state to take over.

repochick's photo
Fri 01/11/08 09:35 AM
Doesnt that also mean that the old state cant do anything to me for this, as in put out a bench warrent and things like that?

Cutiepieforyou's photo
Fri 01/11/08 05:10 PM
I honestly don't know the answer to your question. Sorry. There are so many things that can happen. The original order could be modified if one of the parties requests it and both parties fill out financial affidavits. Then the judge or magistrate decides whether or not it should be modified.I don't know anything about bench warrants. Are they the same as arrest warrants?

kmtiburona's photo
Fri 01/11/08 05:27 PM

I'm currently fighting with the state I used to live in because they want to pursue child support for my son and I dont. I have never attempted to get child support and have no intentions of trying now. So, why cant the state accept my wishes, especially considering I dont live there anymore, and just back off!


As someone state before, your ex owes the state money and they can't get their money unless he pays his obligation. They are probably giving you such a hard time since maybe it was during the period of time you lived in that state? And if it's not paid, then the debt falls onto the state or the taxpayers and that's not fair.

I would call your current state's office and ask to speak to someone there. If that's not possible, I know it's not here; call your old state and ask to speak with a supervisor. Or I know in PA we have what's called a HelpLine, they may be able to point you in the right direction.

I do understand how you feel; but honestly do not see the big deal. I don't know how old your son is, but you are obviously stressed over this and most kids, no matter what age pick up on this. I think it would be better overall to just do it. So what if you don't think you're gonna see a dime? The state doesn't care; as long as you file.

In PA the only time they make you file for child support is when you are receiving cash assistance. As far as medical; I'm not sure, I know if you have shared custody it doesn't apply and if you are married but separated they don't pursue it either with the medical.

AllSmilesInTulsa's photo
Fri 01/11/08 05:44 PM

The state got involved because for a short time I needed some medical assistance for my son. But its been a long time since I have needed the assistance and also a long time since I have lived in that state!


The state is only trying to recover the money paid out when you received the medical assistance. You can offer to pay it back yourself in leiu of them going after the child's father.

repochick's photo
Sat 01/12/08 11:13 AM
Edited by repochick on Sat 01/12/08 11:13 AM

I do understand how you feel; but honestly do not see the big deal. I don't know how old your son is, but you are obviously stressed over this and most kids, no matter what age pick up on this. I think it would be better overall to just do it. So what if you don't think you're gonna see a dime? The state doesn't care; as long as you file.


Its not that I care about the money or not because it means nothing. Once all this takes place it opens up the door to my son's dead beat father to try to come back into my life. He doesnt care about the child, never seen him, he just wants to use it as a tool to try to get to me. Children arent leverage!

lulu24's photo
Sat 01/12/08 11:35 AM
the state pushes my child support because my kids are on arkids 1st. however, i get all the money...none of it goes to the state.

with my last child, they have listened to my request and are NOT pursuing paternity and support. of course, i would have just said that i didn't have a clue who the father was...that he was some guy i picked up in a bar.

part of the reason the state pushes things...is because they want to make certain that the child's father provides insurance and child support. with child support, food benefits decrease...with private insurance, medicaid payouts decrease...

they do NOT use the child support to "pay back the state". that's only in the case of full-blown welfare.

cutelildevilsmom's photo
Sat 01/12/08 12:15 PM

Luvin!!! Hey girl, how's it going!!
I know they had to make changes in the welfare system and all but come on. There are plenty dead beat dads the state could be tracking down not to have to worry about me!

that money is for your child and both parents should contribute regardless if you want it or not.take the money for your kid.

Cutiepieforyou's photo
Sat 01/12/08 01:27 PM
They do use it to pay back the state for the medical.

Cutiepieforyou's photo
Sat 01/12/08 01:27 PM
They do use it to pay back the state for the medical.

lulu24's photo
Sat 01/12/08 01:31 PM

They do use it to pay back the state for the medical.


they don't here. they use it to PREVENT medical from having to be paid in the first place.

child support raises your income level. many are pushed over the limit, and no longer qualify for benefits. they also force the fathers to provide insurance...and medicaid only picks up the non-paid portion.

100 percent of the child support goes to the custodial parent, unless they are receiving AFDC.