WHy no response???

I dont know......Im just here for the free chips and dip...

Many people are more easily offended than you or I are. There are those that get upset at the improper use of a smiley. People shouldn't HAVE to get a thicker skin in order to enjoy this site.

Nobody wants to come where they don't feel welcome or comfortable. We're really trying to find a balance. It's not necessary to know WHO is on or moving things when you can see exactly where it's gone to. Should you feel the need, you can easily email any of us.

We love this site and want to see it grow. Our intentions are to BETTER it here by quicker response to issues that pop up. For the most part, I think we've been pretty darned successful.

If there are a bunch of us, consider that it's because we are here on a volunteer basis rather than being paid; Mike understands that each of us also have lives outside of JSH (is there such a thing?). This is also freeing up Mike and Van's time to better JSH.

Also, if you see something that we've missed, please use the "report" option. This directs our attention directly to where it needs to be, and is highly appreciated.

Great post Robin -- been noticing some of the same remarks. Thanks for the posting.

lulu24 has some very good points here. For the threads that are being moved are only being put in the correct places that they should have been placed in within the first place. I see no harm in that. And then the abuse reports are being handled quickly as possible with out much delay.

What does this do in the long run it gives the Site Admin. more time to enhance the site and give us more options to have and to enjoy.

Even though there may be several of us regardless in the back ground we still ask each other for advice on different situations.

We are not here to disrupt anyones fun we want to have that ourselves but we are here to try to keep the bashing down and have the site as pleasant as possible for all to enjoy.

Besides it was mentioned at first it was just Van & Mike that dealt with the forums. Well not sure if some realize it or not I have been here since shortly after this site started. The size of this site has grown way beyond what it was just with the Mingle merge it brought approx 40,000 people to the site. Not mentioning all the others that have joined also from other dating sites. All we are here for is to relieve Mike, Van, Andrew & Matt from the duties we do in order for them to work on other things within the site to give us more options to have in the future.

Believe me the same rules you follow by are enforced with us as well.

I have a brother who also grew up between 300-400lb. Certainly, I did not feel his personal pain, but I did feel my own personal pain for what he indured. His family, though, never judged him, we were his soft place to land when the world was indeed not 'warm and fuzzy'. JSH is not the world, but it is a family and indeed...a soft place to land for a lot folks, we hope to keep it that way.

guess I'm just accustomed to fighting my own battles...and being an adult about it...bullies exist everywhere and eventually you learn to just ignore them...once you quit responding to them they go away. I have my fragile times too...but I don't share them with an entire "community" but rather leave them for times when I around someone I trust to respect that fragility...

it's funny, cause I follow the rules...at least for the most part. however, the fact that we feel the need to constantly go over the rules gives some idea that they aren't really expected...and short of making JSH a pay site and baring specific ISP's...what are ya gonna do, post the rules every other day?

Here's my point, if we all just GROW UP a little and act like the adults we are supposed to be (in order touse this site) then maybe we won't have the need to post all these rules and delete comments and move topics and all that...

GEEZ...

and I like the fact that all the response posts were basically along the lines of "We're right and you're wrong"

Why isn't this enforced??

All those stupid "Am I cute?" and "Would you date me?" and "I'm so bored" threads clog up the forums and serve to perhaps deter other more reasonable or mature posters.

Truthfully?

That's a pretty broad area, and easily twisted. While I personally might see these as being "attention seeking", the author of the thread generally feels that they are just chit-chatting or playing around.

They might also say that they are truly seeking advice, which IS permitted.

Therefore, the thread is read through and placed in whichever category it best fits.

Okay how about a MOD responding to a topic that BLATANTLY does not belong in general???

Like the "Ladies which is it?' question...which, techinically belong in sex and dating...and a MOD responded to it...

The Admins are working on a solution to that problem, what has been suggested is a separate forum for those topics. We do not wish to exclude anyone, and there may also be a forum rule change pertaining to this.

What i would like you all to understand, Is that we have new members joining this site everyday. Since they are new, they are looking for an "icebreaker" (if you will) and we should welcome these new people, not discourage them. What may seem pointless to the more experienced, is not necessarily what you perceive it to be.

Look at it this way, if you are at a social function, say a party...whatever...and someone new to the scene walks in, Do you not think they are nervous? Maybe just trying to make conversion and friends? lets not exclude those people from this community ok?

I realize this does not always apply, and some people may do this for whatever reason, but do give some thought to what i have said here. Is this unreasonable to consider?

maybe you all can explain this to me then. here's an example of what i see going on.

i had 3 profiles a month ago to try various things as far as how people see a profile and various content. none of them broke the rules or violated anything, no cussing, no insults, no personal information, basically all said the same thing with a different picture and phrased in a different way so i know it's not that. so i'm left with what was posted in the forums...

profile #1, this one. i have made some very debatable comments, made very bad jokes at others expense basically just pushed the limits of the rules. so far maybe 5 posts have gotten deleted and a letter from a mod.

profile #2 i have not made any jokes, only responded in an advisory way not really made too many posts at all. your basic, putting a picture up will help, talk about your likes instead of dislikes. it's had 20 posts deleted and no letters from a mod.

profile #3 no here's the kicker, profile got deleted based on 1 post. the only forum post i made on that profile period. now guess what the topic was? a latino only thread that read something along the lines of we only want latinos on this thread the rest of you can stay the hell out. i posted "i think thats a bit racist here, it's ok for you to have an all latino post but if i were to have a white only post i'd get kicked off here so fast. it's ok to say black power and latino pride but i say the same thing about whites and i'm a racist." and booom gone! just like that.

now granted there's only 10 of you for the 100,000 or so people that come here but does that sound logical to you? i'm sure you all work hard and lose track of certain things and overlook others maybe just completely unaware of some things but come on. if your going to set rules in place it needs to be the same for everybody not just 75% of the people. the mods friends don't get to get excluded. regardless of who is doing what if your going to look at a post and say well maybe it should go here, well maybe it's inappropriate , well maybe thats an insult or maybe it's not. maybe you don't understand the rules as much as you think you do.

these attention getting threads, i'm sorry but "am i hot?" is not asking for advice. "rate me 1-10" doesn't tell me i'm having trouble, i could use some feed back on my profile format. and yet their allowed to stay. and thats a simple problem to fix, profile help category, done.

long story made short, this seems to me to be pretty bias and with a huge margin for self interpretation which it should not have. cut and dry, it either complies or it doesn't simple as that.

The members ages vary here, depending on our life experience and age we all 'grow-up' at a different rate...thus, the reason for the forum rules. While you and a great many others may follow the rules, some do not.

As to threads being posted in the wrong area. In an effort to not become rigid in applying the rules if a topic fits just as well where it is and is doing no harm, sometimes it is elected to leave it where it is. Having said that, the mods cannot be everywhere, there are things we are going to miss. That is where the abuse reports come into play and you are always welcome to e-mail any one of us with any concerns you have.

As to the Forum Rules being re-visited time and again, to my knowledge this is the first time they have been posted in a thread outside of their own topic to be read by members. I felt there was a need for it.

Well the thread you just happen to be talking about I’m the one that posted to that one. But now according to the site Admin there are threads that can go either way and if that is the case we were told to leave them in General.

Which is what has happen with the thread you have in question. There is no curse words and only the mind makes you wonder to the sexually aspect of what is being talked about.

But even though we are Mods first and foremost we are still members just as anyone else is. We are here to post in the threads and to enjoy the site like everyone else.

And since there are so many that do not go into the sex and dating forums this thread can go either or so therefore evidently it seems that all the Mods must have figured it was one of those threads that was an either or and left it.

If at any time our actions are not what one thinks they should be they are welcome to report us as you would anyone else. And let Mike or Van look at the actions we have taken we are not any better than anyone else and must follow the rules even more so we are checked on what our actions are on a daily basis.

azrae1l first of all the mods have only been in effect for one month. And unless someone does a report abuse on you we don't have a reason unless we just happened upon your post.


Second of all by having 3 profiles you do break the rules of JSH which a member is only allowed one profile at a time.

I didn't even know there was rules, I just thought you were supposed to use common sense and good judgement?

Rules????

so first of all by me saying a month ago that somehow translated to more then a month before you started doing it? not sure how that happened but ok. so if your relying on us to report stuff what exactly do you do again? we could just as easily moderate ourselves. but thats not here nor there.

and as far as having 3 profiles, i'd like to see where that rule is placed because it's not in the forums rules, privacy policy or terms of use - i just read them all word for word 3 times over and so far i have yet to see something limiting how many accounts an individual can have. but just for grins i'll go sign up another one just to make sure it's not in the sign up process .

nope it's not, so where does that rule come from? is that a secret rule we're not supposed to know about? or was it made up on the spot?


you know what? i don't really care anymore. this is a wasted subject and a waste of my time.

The Forum rules are posted at the top of every "page" or "section" of the forums.

Isn't reading the rules a common sense prerequisite to posting in said forums?

Is this unreasonable to consider?

I'm not trying to be an ass here. I'm asking a sincere question. I think all those dumb "am I cute - would you date me" threads do more to discourage and drive away new members than enforcing the rules ever would.

azrae it is absolutely against site rules to have more than one profile on here. If it is not specifically spelled out in forum/site guidelines I am sure that will soon be rectified.

If you are not using the abuse report function or taking your specific concerns to mod in e-mail then I am not sure how we can address your concerns here after the fact.

My intent for this thread was to give folks an opportunity to read and/or refresh themselves with the forum rules......period. There are other methods in place...abuse reports and e-mailing the mods or admin to address specific concerns, we encourage you to utilize them.