Okay, I need some advice. Here's the details:

Went to Flagstaff 1 month ago, met Al at Packers game at bar. We spent the weekend together and got along wonderfully! He meets practically all the details I am looking for in a mate (except location since I live in California). I returned home and we kept in touch. Then he found out I was thinking about returning to the dating world and he changed. He started arguing about how many words per minute I type, why I don't use punctuation in text messages, etc. He even raised his voice a little to me. So, I figured it was not a good choice.

Now I am missing him. I talked to some friends about the dilemma and they told me he behaved in that manner because he didn't want to take a chance on losing me. While I was in Flagstaff I told him I had signed up on a different singles site, then I noticed last week he sent me a flirt.

What do I do? I'm thinking about him a lot, missing him, but, worried about the long distance thing, and the fact of how he reacts to uncomfortable conversations...

HELP!

What does your heart tell you?


Listen to it

He thought he could keep from losing you by arguing with you and raising his voice??


He sure doesn't sound like a keeper to me. He sounds like an insecure jerk. You deserve better.

My heart tells me to call him and let him know I miss him and that I am sorry...

Arguing and raising his voice were probably just his "true" colors coming out.
I would stay away.

Hmmmm are there people who truly never ever argur or raise their voices? Could he have done those things because he was scared of losing you?

I do have a long track record of being attracted to jerks...

I would stay away, too. Don't you deserve to be treated better?

That's what my roommate and neighbor think. Because he was scared.

what could it hurt to talk to him at least you would know instead of wonder..then take it from there ..

Ya, I do deserve to be treated as good as I treat others. Okay, it is looking like the consensus is to stay away...

Tell my heart that now!

I would take the arguing and act of being semi hostile as a warning sign. Usually these types tend to be manipulative and controlling. That is only my observation..........take it for what its worth......good luck.

Maybe reconnect, but cautiously...you'll never know if you don't try, but keep your instincts on alert for the 'jerk' traits!

A compromise, not a bad idea!

What are some of the 'jerk' traits?

Not worth your time if he is raising his voice at you and telling you how to do stuff etc.

Go find some one else.

Surely you might miss that type of stuff but is it really worth it ? Think about it. I mean what would happen if you stayed with him, it could get much more worse.

Just email him if you want to on another email then deleted it and tell him how you feel and let it go that is if you want to.

I don't know what you would do, but if I was in that situation, I would forget about him and move on.

I am thinking cut the strings with him now. Let him go, I also believe his true colors are showing thru by him yelling at you. I was in abusive relationship for to long and I am telling you as a friend. Dump HIM NOW.

Good Luck to YOU in what ever YOU decide to do.

I was just wondering if you could show me one.. Just one perfect person. Honestly we all raise our voices or argue. It is as much a part of life as love. Now abusive behavior should not be tolerated. IMHO.

My first thought is that these sound like warning signs that he may not be all that good for you. Most controlling and manipulative and potentially abuser type men are very nice and charming and wonderful to a person. That he starts to belittle you and trying to find flaws to point out to you indicates that now he might be indicating that, oh people wouldn't want to get to know you because of these things and that you are better off just as you are, talking with him. You aren't even in the came state and dating and he is doing this. Imagine if you were. I would move on.