Raising kids is such a big thing, big responsibility, and I honestly doubt most parents are conscious of this when they're raising children.
When I was in my late 20s with 2 young kids, married, I read that older parents -around 40- are better parents as they're calmer and have their lives sorted.
It angered me tremendously. But, thinking about that when I was in my 40s I realised it was true. If I then had to raise kids, or now at 56, I'd do a much better job. Indeed because your life is calmer.
Less career and societal pressures.
And I do think the way our societies are construed put an awful lot of pressure on parents AND children.
Isn't it insane?

I got thinking about this because of my Nila, my young cat. She's so confident, knows she's worthy, knows she's deserving of love & care & kindness, she's always felt loved and lovable and as such can be loving. She has no fear, no ungrounded fear, as there was no reason. She could and can be authentic and pure.
I allowed her to be herself. Why would I try to change her? So even when she did things that didn't suit me I let her be herself. I've accepted her as she is with all her traits, good or not.
(And what is not good is usually only "not handy for me", not really "bad".)

That had me thinking: wow, if only we and our children could grow up like that!!!

Then the thought "WHY aren't we and our children raised like this?"
The only answer I can think of is societal pressure.

Society expects us AND our children to be and behave a certain way. To what extent this is transferred to the child depends on how much the parent(s) are susceptible to this. I was very sensitive to it, wanting to do it right. That was my own burden from the past, insecurity etc. That doesn't bother me much anymore now, but it did when I was raising children...

Then there is pressure of making children do things because you have to be on time. When you have to go to work you haven't the time to accommodate a child's obnoxious behaviour, even if that moment of rebelling is very important for the child's emotional & mental health.
So you tell it off, get verbal, maybe even verbally abusive or slap the kid's bottom. While the child didn't even really do anything wrong, it's just you being in a hurry because of societal demands. All that undermines a child's sense of Self and self-worth/confidence etc.

The same with getting the child at school on time. And many other societal things. Like having to walk in line at pre-school, kindergarten, school, etc. etc. regardless of a child's innate nature and needs.
They're being pushed, forced rather, in the societal mould whether it fits them or not.
Without realising it, we are only attempting to create perfect pawns for the societal game.

And now at age 56 myself, I daresay: Most people do NOT feel good in that mould. They've just forgotten who they really were.

So when I see my li'l Nila it feels me with joy.
And hope that maybe one day in the near future our offspring and offspring's offspring can grow up that way too.

And I hope parents-to-be become wiser at a younger age so this pattern gets broken.

I do think there's a shift in this as it is per generation.
Like the older generation (older than me that is) tends to measure their offspring's well-being by their status, income, marital status etc., in other words: how well they fit into the old mould.
What matters to me is my offspring's happiness in life, regardless of status, income, marital status etc. I don't give a toss about those things. The only important thing to me is that my kids are happy.

Would you do things entirely different if you could raise your kids now, with what you now know?
I sure as hell would!

Hindsight is always preferable Biologically, there are more risks associated with having children above 40, so that is not preferable to many.
People have sex/make love all the time and children are concieved, whether in marriage or not. And parents get on with it, ill prepared or not.
Personally, I felt mature and ready when we planned our child at 30 and 31. Sure I made mistakes, but my adult child is very free and modern. I guess parenting styles are different. I never bowed to societal expectations, I really do not understand the pressure to do so?
I used to love it when people would say, "Omg, what is that mark on your childs face?"
"My lipstick", I would reply.
An abundance of love and kisses never hurts.
Different strokes for different folks.
Glad you have a happy cat
And life is about learning, lets keep doing it

oh i though it said ' RAISING CHICKENS " DARN