People have accused me of being smart and witty with a very dry sense of humor, but you can decide that for yourself when we meet.

I don't pay particular attention to diet or working out mainly because the food I like is healthy anyway and my lifestyle keeps me in reasonable shape. To describe me as old school wouldn't be far off the mark and I think relationships are all about complementing each other not competing with each other. I'm not a huge fan of dating sites or dating apps and prefer meeting people the old fashioned way - too much alcohol and poor judgement :)

As for my match - well it's unlikely you're younger than 40 ish, you're definitely switched on and conversation comes easy between us. Like me, you're probably not a triathlete but you can walk up a flight of stairs without stopping for breath halfway. You don't believe 'we only live once', you believe we only die once, we live every moment of every day.

Major turn-offs for me are people who can't write without their tongue sticking out and who can't fit in an average car seat without body parts draping over the edges :) Major turn-ons for me are openness, honesty, effective communication skills and ability to listen as well as speak. Nobody likes relationship jeopardy where one of us has to say 'I'll take 'WTF did I do wrong' for a 1000.

Together we're formidable and have fun speeding around the racetrack, boating and getting away for weekends, spending time at home, and loving every second of each other's company. Let's give it a whirl, say hello :)

Humorous, to the point, a bit long, but decent.

Have to wonder what ": Self Employed Business Professional" means, a bit cryptic and scammerish.

Hellooooooooooooo Alan I think your writeup gives a good glimpse of who you are and what you are looking for . .. so well done for your efforts .

Not sure you have chosen the best main photo to market yourself . Don’t underestimate the power of that initial two second impression .. laughing ... Black and white photos can be trendy , lack the warmth that colour brings and can be misleading (sometimes used as camouflage lol) . Eyes and smiles are big draw cards for many women. It is okay to wear shades and hats but one photo wearing them is enough . Instead perhaps include photos that express your interest /lifestyle .

Best of luck
P.s.

I didn't know to say Hello.. It has such a big construction of definition to explaination about self without misinterpreted of others creativity.

GOOD , A BIT LONG.....TAKE WHAT I SAID AND OTHER

MEN SAY WITH A GRAIN SALT........PAY CLOSE

ATTENTION TO

WHAT THE WOMEN SAY, THEY WILL BE USING A FEMALE

YARD STICK TO SIZE YOU UP.......THERE OPINION IS

THE ONLY ONE THAT REALLY COUNTS....

On the back of Blondey111 valuable feedback, my suggestion would be put yourself into the eyes, thoughts and feelings of as many of the people you may offend from some of your stereo typical descriptive narrative options you have of people. You would fall into my computer says no file as it stands

Close the Nose..

Thank you Mowtowndowndown, I was trying to find a box that said, 'freelance business consultant who identifies and fixes company resource issues, in particular, human and financial', but there wasn't one for that. Besides, what woman wants to read all that crap? and why waste 500 words on that nonsense when all that will come out during a date?

Thank you Blondey, I didn't realize there were so many with hats on - I took a couple without so people can see I do, in fact, have a head of hair. Can I bring 1 though when I come to New Zealand?

Thank you Robin, I can't do much about the nose, it comes that way. That's why I don't get invited to too many cocaine parties

Thanks Cleve, over the years I've learned that women want a guy to make them laugh, think and c%^m - a woman once told me that :)

Morning Leah, thank you, and now we've got the 'NOs' out of the way, there's plenty of space for YESes - we already have one of the coolest TV shows ever in common (Little Britain) :)

If the Baker's Arms is still there we could have lunch and figure out the rest (insert cheeky grin). xx

We usually do Coca-whiskey party

lol