I am about to make a BIG change.

I am moving out of my house in the country, and going back into the service.

It is gonna be an adventure training and serving with men 20 years my juniour, but I love a good adventure.

I have been living my life for women that used my love to serve their purposes, and now its time for me.

So, away I go.

I am in a relationship and have been for 3 years, I always find myself trying to change him, I have to learn to accept him for who he is, although there is alot of good about him there are definitely a few bad things as well. guess if down the road those "bad things" dont change then I should just leave.

i dont think its about changing ... its learning how to cope with each others needs..cause at my ripe old age dont think im gonna change much... nor would my partner...

The only thing we can really count on in this world is change. I know I am not the same person now as I was in my 30's, my 20's or my teens. I'm thinking it is a good thing I did not draw such a hard line as 'Take me for what I am.. I ain't changing'. If I did... I could have become an emotionally 15 year old boy, stuck in a 44 year old body!

Many of those changes, both drastic and subtle happened in or as a result of relationships. There are some things in life that you just can't see about yourself without others involvement.

There is a saying that has held very true in my life. 'If you want to learn about your character defects, get into a relationship. If you don't want to learn about them, get a house plant, maybe a dog.'

What I do with that information is my choice. No one can make me change... but to do nothing is not growing. Not growing is pretty self defeating...not to mention, not too healthy for any relationship you might be in.

i dont think its about changing ... its learning how to cope with each others needs..cause at my ripe old age dont think im gonna change much... nor would my partner...

If you Love someone, Why would you want to change them, That being the case you never really Loved them in the first place.

I an't a changing for NOBODY.. Everyone should be Loved for who they are, we are all different and that is what makes us unique.

the only one I can change is me. Try to love everybody for who they are

yep.


yep

I KNOW that NO ONE can MAKE another CHANGE who they are, and like these members said above.
YOU ONLLY need to LOVE the person for WHO THEY ARE!
If YOU CAN"T then MOVE ON..
Because THEY will be WHO THEY ARE!

And YOU NEED to KNOW THAT!

To LOVE is to BE LOVED. and one has to except the other for, and with ALL THEIR indifferences and to LOVE their indifferences because THAT is THEM.
If the indifferences out weigh the love, then THE LOVE IS "NOT" REAL!

the only that any change for the good in a relationship is going to happen is if it is fully communicated and wanted by both parties. Its not fair to either if only one does the changing AND it tends to build resentment so it has defeated the purpose. So think about it... if you are not willing to change some for someone then you are not in the right relationship. Its not always about "take me as I am" if they re with you then they have, its about growing as a couple

Looking?????

Nope.

Never was, never will be, looking for what?

And why?

To fill a void? To replace loneliness with the warm fuzzies?

I have never been looking...and won't be.
I am a complete person with or without another.

I would prefer to meet someone who is also a complete person, and see what it is that we can create together, without the neediness, and the placing obligations on each other.

And that is exactly what has appeared...a complete self sufficient person, who shares similar ideals, and doesn't require 'fixing' or being 'fixed'..who also sees an opportunity for an adventure with someone.

Relationships are all about learning to relate, with no expectations, nor obligations by either party.

Being together is to enhance the already WHOLE experience we were having separately...not to create a 'whole' experience.

I hear a lot about 'found my other half'... and it makes me wonder, who would in their right mind, choose a half a person over a whole person?

So not looking, never was, but have been blessed to meet another like minded person, who also feels we can create more good in the world together, by joining forces.

the only that any change for the good in a relationship is going to happen is if it is fully communicated and wanted by both parties. Its not fair to either if only one does the changing AND it tends to build resentment so it has defeated the purpose. So think about it... if you are not willing to change some for someone then you are not in the right relationship. Its not always about "take me as I am" if they re with you then they have, its about growing as a couple

Thanks sweetie i learned from the school of hard knocks