how can you notice when someone's crushing on you??

as a lady or a gentleman, what do you look at when a person approach you for friendship?

like is a process

To me "crushing" implies ongoing feelings that aren't being communicated.

I'm an adult. Relationships are based on communication.

I'm not going to be held responsible for other peoples insecurities.

Am I attracted to them? I will say something. I will tell them how I feel and what I would like to do. I make my communication about myself and avoid telling them how they do, or should, feel, which means I don't try to drag it out of them either.

If I'm not attracted to them? Are they making me uncomfortable with their attentions or insecure passive aggressive "crushing" behavior? I'm going to tell them to go away.

Or IOW I don't try to "figure out" if someone's "crushing" on me. That's for them to grow up and communicate. At most I'm going to figure out if I'm "crushing" on them, and do something about that.
So for me it doesn't really matter if they're "crushing" on me.
Do I want to date them? I'll tell them. If they say no? Oh well.
Are they acting how I would define as oddly around me? I'll either ask them to tell me what's going on, or I will tell them to go away.


I'm not sure exactly how you mean this.
I don't approach friendships like romantic relationships and dating.
If some random stranger came up to me and said "will you be my friend?" I'd probably laugh in their face.
Again, I'm not a child.

There's got to be an organic approach.
Last "friend" I made was just some stranger at the shooting range. I asked about what he was shooting, we talked about recoil, grips, we let each other fire off a few rounds of our respective guns, we talked about guns, we saw each other at the range a few times after that, we went over to a gun show.
There was no "approaching for friendship," there was just "approaching as a friendly human being."
Other than that, it's consistently asserting my own boundaries and comfort zone and communicating.
I don't know if that dude is gay or not, I don't care, I won't ask. I'm not gay. I don't want to date him.
If he was "crushing" on me and started acting weird, I'd call him on his behavior. If he said he was "crushing" on me and liked me, I'd tell him I'm not interested, and most likely not talk to him again.

But I don't see friendships as interim or orbital emotional tampons until a romantic relationship comes along where it's all "I don't want to lose the friendship! I don't know what to do!?! Waaaah!"
Friendships are the easiest thing to make as long as you're friendly to people and are consistent with your personality and boundaries.


So these kind of questions I don't really understand.
To me they seem like "I'm an insecure person, I need some guarantee before I make a decision or commit to what I think or feel or want. I want things handed to me. I want there to be no consequences, conflict, or any negative emotions whatsoever. I want my cake and to eat it too. I want someone guaranteed to stick around and wholeheartedly experiment, totally committed each time, in the types of relationships available until we find one that works, if one doesn't, then they're committed to the other."

By the effort they're putting in. For example, how often do they text you? What do the texts say? How often are they trying to make plans with you? How often do they try to "accidentally" or coincidentally run into you? I.e, are they trying to monopolize your time?

As a lady, I look for kindness. A kind heart speaks volumes.

It makes me uncomfortable but I guess it is when a guy comments about my looks, asks a lot of rather personal questions and/or asks me out frequently to have friendly walks together. Am from the Philippines and most people here are said to be introverts, so these instances of going out of one's way could be signs.