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Topic: Please explain
Doomsday's photo
Mon 12/17/07 03:19 PM
Whenever i start to talk to someone on here they ask me how was my day. I can understand that, i mean its a simple question that people usually ask. But my problem is im in Iraq. So when i explain how my day was or what i did i usually revolves around that. I dont mind telling people that im in the military i signed up for it. What does bother me is the next thing they say is "oh well be safe over there". Its a nice thing to say but thats all they do. They dont write back, its like im dead to the world cause im over here. It sucks, just cause im over here doesnt mean i dont wana meet someone. Besides my deployments almost over, and it wouldnt hurt to just talk to someone other than the people ive seen every single day for the past year. So if you can explain this to me please let me know.

azrae1l's photo
Mon 12/17/07 03:21 PM
it's because that would be an extremely hard relationship to walk into. a few hundred mile sis hard enough for people let alone 10,000 miles and being shot at.

no photo
Mon 12/17/07 03:23 PM
Maybe a generic 'fine' would be an acceptable answer to that question at first. Maybe it wouldn't be a bad idea to leave that information for later conversations. Get them on the hook first, right? lol

MsTeddyBear2u's photo
Mon 12/17/07 03:24 PM
I don't know if I can explain that...

I believe it is because some people can not handle it...

drinker

laughsandgiggles's photo
Mon 12/17/07 03:26 PM
It might be because most people cannot relate to what you are going through over there. it is beyond our comprehension, so after the polite greetings and the questions, they do not know what to say.

It has nothing to do with you or what you do- its just that you have not been talking to people who can relate or understand. Some people don't know how to converse. just talk, have a simple conversation. If I ask someone how their day was i want to hear about what happened that day- talk to me- i ask cuz im interested. Not everyone can do that. hang in there, it will get easier. But im sure they are sincere when they tell you to stay safe over there and come home soonflowerforyou

no photo
Mon 12/17/07 03:28 PM
because the first thing that would come to mind is,what if he doesnt make it back,or gets hurt.
This war has taken alot of lives and has mentally screwed up alot also.
Besides the distance is far greater than a state or two away

Drivinmenutz's photo
Mon 12/17/07 03:42 PM
Frankly i agree with Josh. You gotta get conversations going before you can let on that you are over there. Its just a tough subject for some people to grasp. Most people haven't seen what you've seen and they find it hard to relate. When i first got back i was either asked 8 million questions about the war like i was some sort of celebrity or people avoided the whole subject around me. It just takes a while to get used to. Take care bro.

tom396's photo
Mon 12/17/07 03:45 PM
You think it might have anything to do with your choice of screennames? I mean, doomsday? Iraq? Just a thought.

Doomsday's photo
Mon 12/17/07 03:47 PM
tom makes a good point

no photo
Mon 12/17/07 03:52 PM
You have an excellent point. Perhaps the people that you first chat with aren't ones that are willing to wait until you get home to date. I'm not saying that's right, because it's unfair to you for them not to get to know you, it's just a thought about what they may be thinking. Maybe you could suggest that you're simply looking for a friend's first type of relationship, and see where it goes from there? Just because you're in the military doesn't mean you're not coming home and it's their mistake to assume so.

Mossop's photo
Mon 12/17/07 04:00 PM
Many of us well know how you feel and understand your desire to talk to people leading what you may think of as a normal life, we all have our own way of living in hell and dealing with it.

Myself I spent more time then I wish to remember in "Hot zones" But for me the last thing I wanted or needed was to have the added worry of a wife, lover or girlfriend at home.

Take care friend

yogabooty5's photo
Mon 12/17/07 04:10 PM

Whenever i start to talk to someone on here they ask me how was my day. I can understand that, i mean its a simple question that people usually ask. But my problem is im in Iraq. So when i explain how my day was or what i did i usually revolves around that. I dont mind telling people that im in the military i signed up for it. What does bother me is the next thing they say is "oh well be safe over there". Its a nice thing to say but thats all they do. They dont write back, its like im dead to the world cause im over here. It sucks, just cause im over here doesnt mean i dont wana meet someone. Besides my deployments almost over, and it wouldnt hurt to just talk to someone other than the people ive seen every single day for the past year. So if you can explain this to me please let me know.


im sorry to hear how people are to you.. my cousin just got shipped out from hawaii and my friend who has been in iraq for awhile just lost contact with. no one has heard from him in a long time so we have no idea if hes still with us. if u ever need to talk, im here flowerforyou

wendynhouston's photo
Mon 12/17/07 04:17 PM
I don't see why people would stop talking to you just because you are over there. A person can never have too many friends. I know Iraq is a little far to start a relationship, but atleast you could talk and get to know someone, and who knows maybe when you get back to the states, there could be a road trip or something. You never know!

nonchalantwendy's photo
Mon 12/17/07 04:25 PM
People are funny my dear.......Many Americans really don't want to know what you are experiencing over there...ignorance is bliss......And many woman do not want to get involved with a man in the service it is too emotional....most woman are very needy... You are a special person volunteering to protect and serve your country.... you deserve respect and conversations from any one of us......If you ever want to talk about anything....feel free to chat with me..about anything...:smile:

Moondark's photo
Mon 12/17/07 04:34 PM
I have several friends over in the sandbox right now. We don't write a lot, about once or twice a month. But that is because my life is pretty much same old, same old and they can't really talk about their life there. So we kinda catch up on a monthly basis. Maybe it reminds some people about how they are conflicted about what is going on over there. Maybe some people can't separate their feelings on the policy and the policy makers from the individuals who are serving. In the end, it is just kinda silly. Be well, and if you feel the need to hear about the tedium of working 2 jobs and never having enough time to sleep, drop me a line.

styxx's photo
Mon 12/17/07 04:37 PM
if they stop talking to you over a simple thing like that..with knowing your come home date etc.....then they wernt worth talking to in the fisrt place in my opinion

no photo
Mon 12/17/07 04:51 PM
Some people don't know how to handle that kind of thing. They may feel, for lack of a better word, intimidated. It's actually really sad. I'm sorry that it is happening to you. In my opionion it shows a lack of pride for our country and our soldiers! I for one would have thanked you for all that you do for us. Maybe it's just because I am ex-military. So let me say Thank you now!!!flowerforyou

andreajayne's photo
Mon 12/17/07 05:06 PM
Being with anyone in the Military is hard. It takes the right kind of person to do it. A lot of people just can not handle it. I know it's hard being over there, but it's hard sitting at home wondering too.

I've been there, and I would totally do it again. I'm sorry you are having problems meeting someone. People are too judgemental.

nonchalantwendy's photo
Wed 12/19/07 10:35 PM
You know I care my dear........

snash02's photo
Wed 12/19/07 10:47 PM

Whenever i start to talk to someone on here they ask me how was my day. I can understand that, i mean its a simple question that people usually ask. But my problem is im in Iraq. So when i explain how my day was or what i did i usually revolves around that. I dont mind telling people that im in the military i signed up for it. What does bother me is the next thing they say is "oh well be safe over there". Its a nice thing to say but thats all they do. They dont write back, its like im dead to the world cause im over here. It sucks, just cause im over here doesnt mean i dont wana meet someone. Besides my deployments almost over, and it wouldnt hurt to just talk to someone other than the people ive seen every single day for the past year. So if you can explain this to me please let me know.
That just seems mean that they never reply after that .. dont let it get you down ... some people just dont have a big enough heart to have comomn sense to remember that your a person too ... it has to be tuff to be over there ... i couldnt even imagin ... i give you tons of kutos ... you will find someone one day that is sweet enough to understand ... keep your chin up and remember tomorrow is always a new day ... stay safe and thank you for keeping us safe ... much love sarah

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