A LDR is what you make of it and how it fits your relationship expectations. If you expect to see your partner most of the time then a LDR is not for you. If you have your own life and enjoy it and you are content being together on some weekends, then it might be ideal. There is a lot to be said for the planning and anticipation that goes into a LDR. Generally, it is enjoying most of the good stuff of a relationship while not having to tolerate much of the bad stuff.

It has worked for some, but I think that's a rarity. I tried it a couple times with no success. I think trust is essential but I think it's also difficult to have from a distance. As someone mentioned before, that is an especially difficult task for someone that may have trust issues.

No. No. Hell no. Did I make myself clear? If not let me reiterate. NO!

The reasons:

1)It's all crap until you spend lots of time TOGETHER.

2)The INEVITABLE unrealistic expectations. Expectations of any sort tend to be a killer. Unrealistic expectations not met are the cause of people crying in the forums, or on any social media site about the tragedy of a broken heart

3)See 1 & 2.

It may work out for a while, as long as he knows he's in the Friends Zone, with no sex included. Not knowing who he's with miles away I would be more comfortable. Committed Relationships are for Couples.

3 or more is a crowd .

Like everything... You BOTH have to want to make it work...

This can go both ways. If one wants a LDR to work and the other doesn't, then it will not work. Even if both want it to work that still doesn't guarantee it will work but at least if both want it to and try to make it work it stands a better chance of working.

LET's can work but, like many have said the real issues you face are trust and true commitment. I have had several friends that have meet, married and are truly happy.

For me right now I'm in a LDR. We will be making are engagement official at Thanksgiving. It's not easy but, it's not hard if like I said before, if you have trust and are truly committed to each other.

For all you forum long distance lovebirds.


https://youtu.be/62ZJn0cTASo

Unless you meet right away, and even then, it can be difficult to get past the preconceived ideas you develop about that person. The expectations and preconceived ideas end up interfering with the natural flow of things so that when you finally do meet, you are a little bewildered to totally disappointed... If you're thoughts about fireworks happening when you finally see each other "Don't" happen... What then?

Having met a few that I interact with in the forums, even though it was on a friendship basis, it was still difficult to not make up in my mind what that person was like face to face... We use our senses in getting to know someone. Online you imagine what their voice sounds like, you imagine what their facial expressions are, you imagine how they walk and you might even imagine them smiling at something you said.

Suppose you meet them and they don't smile.. how much of a let down is that going to be. Even with talking on the phone and skyping... The face to face interaction is vital for sustainability and the sooner the better. Otherwise be prepared to meet the person created in your imagination and they will most likely be someone else, or for there to be subtle differences to what you predetermined.

With all that said... Yeah, I'd still go for it

I think the only way to do it is by slow playing and underselling yourself.

If I'm ever single again and looking at a long distance relationship, I'm going to try and be as nerdy and nonsexual as possible. No expectations to live up to.

I'm trying to imagine you being nerdy and nonsexual


I tend to agree with what you're saying. At least be your authentic self, don't try to be more to impress someone. Underselling yourself has it's risks too, you might get passed over.

Do enough to get them interested, but not enough to make them moist?

That's tricky...

That sounds about right, I'll work on it

Love can work in mysterious ways ️

STUNNINGLY BEAUTIFUL EYES ️
From a western Canadian

LDR created many strong and happy families. Life is anyway a big joyrney, so why not? I dont mind LDR.
As for me I can't find my significant other in my area, why should I make borders and follow geografical rules? Skype and other videochats make relationship works if both want it :)

true

Well....meeting someone in your own town is normally a coin toss.....LDR is the same.....plus some killer frequent flyer miles....what's in your wallet??????

Can long distance friendship work? If yes, then so can long distance relationships do too.

Is relationship hard? Yes, if you really love someone, then relationship is hard. But if you really love someone, then it can work over distances too.

Been there, done that. But I think moving together in near future has to be an option for it to work over time.

I have adult kids and can move everywhere for love. Gladly to US if so happen..

*IF* the other person is amenable to even ~chatting~...

I am a trapezoidal peg in a region of round holes..I am well aware of this..
Not likely to find anyone local...
Both my long terms were with guys who were also not originally from here...
(Columbus OH and Brooklyn NY..one came with their family when they were 14..the other came here for work)

But, I message guys on the various dating sites who seem to have a lot in common with me based on their profile..and most whine that even 25-30 miles is "toooo faaar..."
I undestand that, and respect that..you do you, boo...

But, how do you get someone to even consider *starting* a long distance chat, to see if there is something there to build on?
I have no ties here (other than I'd have to sell my house), no love for the area, and would *readily relocate..
But no one wants to even chat if they are more than an hours drive away...