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| Topic: Persuasion Dating? | |
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we have trouble reading signs applied with a clue by 4 and you want us to read female minds?  Actually, no. It would be nothing but trouble if you guys really knew what we were thinking. 
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 hmmmmm me thinks i smell a money making gadget in the works ronco's incredible hermindreader only 19.99 plus shipping and handling |
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hmmmmm me thinks i smell a money making gadget in the works ronco's incredible hermindreader only 19.99 plus shipping and handling How will you get it to be gender specific? |
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that's a trade secret
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Don't forget about the new genders, may need to be a big machine eric
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check the name again mikey it won't read it's mind only her's
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Yesterday I ran into a man who I’ve, tactfully, and politely, turned down for a date several times. There reason for my refusal is, but not limited to, feeling his personality rather annoying and often offensive. He leaned, way too far, into my personal space to whisper in my ear...”One of these days I will persuade you.”  My topic isn’t about this guy. I just told the story so you know where I’m coming from with this question. Persuasion will definitely not be working here! But there are bound to be many different types of scenarios where persuasion could effect a person’s decision. Which leads to my question. Have you or would you go out with someone who had to persuaded you to accept a date invitation? And flip-side, would it be worth it to you to persuade someone whose turned you down before? I think it would depend on if I was attracted to him and why I said no. If I said no because I'm not attracted to him and pretty much made that clear... Then no, any kind of persuasion wouldn't be appreciated and would feel creepy to me. If I were attracted to him and was just nervous or wasn't sure yet, then if he tried again in a cute funny kind of way then I would probably say yes. There's too many factors involved to say for sure that I would or wouldn't welcome it. Depends on the situation, the man, and the way the persuasion is carried out. On the flip side, I might ask a second time... probably not a third though. Although same thing applies... depends! |
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Yesterday I ran into a man who I’ve, tactfully, and politely, turned down for a date several times. There reason for my refusal is, but not limited to, feeling his personality rather annoying and often offensive. He leaned, way too far, into my personal space to whisper in my ear...”One of these days I will persuade you.” My topic isn’t about this guy. I just told the story so you know where I’m coming from with this question. Persuasion will definitely not be working here! But there are bound to be many different types of scenarios where persuasion could effect a person’s decision. Which leads to my question. Have you or would you go out with someone who had to persuaded you to accept a date invitation? And flip-side, would it be worth it to you to persuade someone whose turned you down before? I think it would depend on if I was attracted to him and why I said no. If I said no because I'm not attracted to him and pretty much made that clear... Then no, any kind of persuasion wouldn't be appreciated and would feel creepy to me. If I were attracted to him and was just nervous or wasn't sure yet, then if he tried again in a cute funny kind of way then I would probably say yes. There's too many factors involved to say for sure that I would or wouldn't welcome it. Depends on the situation, the man, and the way the persuasion is carried out. On the flip side, I might ask a second time... probably not a third though. Although same thing applies... depends! Good answer. There are too many variables. But if we could get Eric to develope the hismindreader also, we would no longer have that delima. I’m positive I don’t want to know what they’re thinking the other 90% of the time.
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Yesterday I ran into a man who I’ve, tactfully, and politely, turned down for a date several times. There reason for my refusal is, but not limited to, feeling his personality rather annoying and often offensive. He leaned, way too far, into my personal space to whisper in my ear...”One of these days I will persuade you.” My topic isn’t about this guy. I just told the story so you know where I’m coming from with this question. Persuasion will definitely not be working here! But there are bound to be many different types of scenarios where persuasion could effect a person’s decision. Which leads to my question. Have you or would you go out with someone who had to persuaded you to accept a date invitation? And flip-side, would it be worth it to you to persuade someone whose turned you down before? I think it would depend on if I was attracted to him and why I said no. If I said no because I'm not attracted to him and pretty much made that clear... Then no, any kind of persuasion wouldn't be appreciated and would feel creepy to me. If I were attracted to him and was just nervous or wasn't sure yet, then if he tried again in a cute funny kind of way then I would probably say yes. There's too many factors involved to say for sure that I would or wouldn't welcome it. Depends on the situation, the man, and the way the persuasion is carried out. On the flip side, I might ask a second time... probably not a third though. Although same thing applies... depends! Good answer. There are too many variables. But if we could get Eric to develope the hismindreader also, we would no longer have that delima. I’m positive I don’t want to know what they’re thinking the other 90% of the time. That depends on the man too, it could cause some to attempt even more persuasion I wouldn't want to read their minds either. Men are way too visual and it's better I don't hear his thoughts when a drop dead gorgeous woman walks by
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IMHO.. once this girls' mind is made up...its done...
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There's another aspect to this, based on the original example.
Someone who makes it a point to say that they are going to "persuade" someone, in my experience, isn't signalling that they are seriously attracted and interested in you as a person. They are signalling very clearly that they are interested in you as a target, and as a potential trophy. HUGE difference. This kind of behavior tends to be far more prevalent from males, because culturally, males are SUPPOSED to be aggressive, possessive, greedy, determined, unstoppable, brave, and above all, unaffected by the opposition. It's all encapsulated by the often lauded "never take no for an answer" ideal, which males are rewarded for following in all levels and endeavors. The fact that it has always had a very nasty dark side to it, has always been a huge problem, that unfortunately is ignored more than it is addressed. |
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There's another aspect to this, based on the original example. Someone who makes it a point to say that they are going to "persuade" someone, in my experience, isn't signalling that they are seriously attracted and interested in you as a person. They are signalling very clearly that they are interested in you as a target, and as a potential trophy. HUGE difference. This kind of behavior tends to be far more prevalent from males, because culturally, males are SUPPOSED to be aggressive, possessive, greedy, determined, unstoppable, brave, and above all, unaffected by the opposition. It's all encapsulated by the often lauded "never take no for an answer" ideal, which males are rewarded for following in all levels and endeavors. The fact that it has always had a very nasty dark side to it, has always been a huge problem, that unfortunately is ignored more than it is addressed. I get what you're saying and I can agree to an extent. Consider the entire courting ritual. You get interested in someone. You attempt to court them because you find value in them. They are your target. If they were not, you wouldn't be trying to court them. The "trophy" is their love for you. If you succeed, you esentially 'win' their love for you. If nobody tries, nothing ventured, nothing gained. The 'gain' is the relationship that develops between you. The persuasion game starts the moment that contact is made. You ask her/him out, say 'hello', offer a compliment. Its all persuasion to get the other person to aknowledge you as a potential mate (companion, friend, lover, confidant...). Where it gets bad is when one does not accept the decision of the other and ramps up the persuasion, sometimes to the creepy point. |
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There's another aspect to this, based on the original example. Someone who makes it a point to say that they are going to "persuade" someone, in my experience, isn't signalling that they are seriously attracted and interested in you as a person. They are signalling very clearly that they are interested in you as a target, and as a potential trophy. HUGE difference. This kind of behavior tends to be far more prevalent from males, because culturally, males are SUPPOSED to be aggressive, possessive, greedy, determined, unstoppable, brave, and above all, unaffected by the opposition. It's all encapsulated by the often lauded "never take no for an answer" ideal, which males are rewarded for following in all levels and endeavors. The fact that it has always had a very nasty dark side to it, has always been a huge problem, that unfortunately is ignored more than it is addressed. Well, I sure hope I don’t end up having to address it. I agree with you. He is not interested in me as a person, but a conquest. He has always given me a bad vibe. I trust my vibes. They’ve served me well. |
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Hi jan
 this is an interesting topic I have never gone out on dates just to get to know someone but on line I have talked to several some are sincere some are just passing away time. What I just do is let time take over lol. I can use just two hands to count the sincere ones and those that just lost touch but really wanted to get to know me. There are just a few I know I just had to let go although I have to admit to writing to some and being ignored too. Life is so ironic lol
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Hi jan this is an interesting topic I have never gone out on dates just to get to know someone but on line I have talked to several some are sincere some are just passing away time. What I just do is let time take over lol. I can use just two hands to count the sincere ones and those that just lost touch but really wanted to get to know me. There are just a few I know I just had to let go although I have to admit to writing to some and being ignored too. Life is so ironic lol I can't imagine anyone ignoring you.  If they do, there must be something wrong with them.
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Hi jan this is an interesting topic I have never gone out on dates just to get to know someone but on line I have talked to several some are sincere some are just passing away time. What I just do is let time take over lol. I can use just two hands to count the sincere ones and those that just lost touch but really wanted to get to know me. There are just a few I know I just had to let go although I have to admit to writing to some and being ignored too. Life is so ironic lol I can't imagine anyone ignoring you. If they do, there must be something wrong with them.  thank you Charles. That was a nice thing to say. I believe those who do are just way too specific and don’t want to waste their time or mine  I never ignore smart and interesting messages though. Blessings to you 
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IMHO.. once this girls' mind is made up...its done...
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Hi jan this is an interesting topic I have never gone out on dates just to get to know someone but on line I have talked to several some are sincere some are just passing away time. What I just do is let time take over lol. I can use just two hands to count the sincere ones and those that just lost touch but really wanted to get to know me. There are just a few I know I just had to let go although I have to admit to writing to some and being ignored too. Life is so ironic lol That doesn’t sound like a bad o line experience. Most of the people we meet anywhere in life are just passing through. It is still good to know them while you can.
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