Of course I can't change anyone but I can't help myself but to want to help a woman feel good about herself.

Human beings are creatures of emotion. I do not wish to deny my emotions, unfortunately that keeps whirling me into the same postion. My fault - I know.

My apologies if I'm just too in tune with my emotions.

I think there is to many guys trying to get women, by taking sides with them and thinking they will get with the women if they try to comfort them, captain, im not saying thats what you do, but some guys just come off way to strong and that kills a relationship right from the start!!

Thanks jneal



Making a woman feel good about herself are signs of someone who is codependent and you are using enabling behaviors as such. It is not a matter of being in tune with your emotions, it's a matter of understanding why you make the choices you do. I bet if we talked long enough... as I already can see a pattern of compliance just by the manner you write and the message you are trying to convey.

Again you need to sit down, be honest with yourself and your emotions because the brain does an awesome job trying to fool us and write down on paper, what characteristics of women you are attracted to.....when that is done, give me a holler....shoot anyone can do this... but it gives you a start to understanding what you have been seeking vs. what you really want... and what you might have to do to achieve those goals...

That would be men stealing our energy flow....some can't help it... it's the cave man instinct... must conquer....

Great method of self analysis yokoke. In a healthy relationship, the self esteem should already be there.

Another way to look at it is through the views of Ayn Rand. Are you doing this selfishly or selflessly? It's a fine line at first glance.

Hopefully, that made sense.

oh! snap!

yokyoke- life/society is a sign of codependence! it is not always good, it is not always bad.... but in the context of you come into the world alone and leave it alone, i think i see what your point is.

I wrote this for yoko


Affectation was an early sign of a twisted mind.
All virtues had faded away.
Apprehension made her cold but warm she was inside.
The child within her died and left her with a heart of stone.
Surface anger was a thin disguise.
Yet at night she cries.
Behold the pain in her eyes.
Degradation was a grind.
Her true self left behind and compassion you will find.
Hidden by a veil of deception.
And so the story goes.
That's the way she chose to live her life.
And anybody knows the way it feels when you hurt inside.
She is running from herself.
The game of life in which she played.
Looking back upon the early years.
There was room for tears but she chose to push them away.
Condemnation was a vice.
She chose to roll the dice.
Misery was her only friend.
Inner feelings were a neutral zone although she tried to condone.
In a world she faced so alone.
Her salvation came too late.
And on the day she died in others mind.
No one even cried.
Forgot about the veil of deception.
And so the story goes.
That's the way she chose to live her life of deception.

In a healthy relationship yes, not one that is one sided and that is where the OP stands. He is seeking a healthy relationship, but doesn't find them and will continue in a cycle until he understands the previous choices first.

Ayn Rand...philosopher... ahhhh Should I crack open a bottle of vino??? LOL

Made perfect sense....

Life/society is a sign of codendence... to a point.

There are pros/cons of being a codependent and it being a codependent relationship as most are always of out balance.

You come into the world surrounded by loved ones and if you are lucky and lived a good life your loved ones are around you as you leave it.

Alone vs Not Alone
Negative vs Positive

Sola Fide is the factor....

Vino is good, and you know she would. To start with at least.

Yeah, I meant that for the OP, but my brain to fingers translation wasn't all that clear.

and your point is??????? you are basing this poem on me??????

Womenb fresh out of a relationship are no good... give them time to figure out what they really want.

Is there a sale on a Walmart or something?


I am so lost.....how many women are we talking about here ?

500? 2? 93?

And yes nothing worse than a fresh woman...wait till they are a little stale...

Damned yoke you pissing them off today...LOL



LOL Jess....

yeah like a box of crackers left open.... at least them dry out before you double dip....LOL

i think we are basically in agreeance...

These topics can get abbrasive, and well, abrasiveness sometimes hurts... ouch! if you're sensitive that is

But sometimes a dose of reality is needed.....
Thick skinned here...

Yeah bud that goes for men too


I feel good got my 2 cents in lol

Jess even first thing in the morning your wit is sharp