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| Topic: Jokes From All Over The world | |
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To all our Canadian friends .. I just adore Canadian humour .. :)
Q: What's the difference between an American and a Canadian? A: An Canadian not only has a sense of humour but can also spell it. Have you heard that they have four seasons in Canada? 1. Almost Winter 2. Winter 3. Still Winter 4. July Q: Why is President Trump going to contact the Prime Minister of Canada about their economy? A: To find out how Canadians live off of less! Q: How was copper wire invented? A: Two Canadians were fighting over a penny, which they found on the street Q: How do you know Adam was a Canadian? A: Who else could stand beside a naked woman and be tempted by a fruit .. ?  
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That's cute, I like it 
I like your new hat too 
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To all our Canadian friends .. I just adore Canadian humour .. :) Q: What's the difference between an American and a Canadian? A: An Canadian not only has a sense of humour but can also spell it. Have you heard that they have four seasons in Canada? 1. Almost Winter 2. Winter 3. Still Winter 4. July Q: Why is President Trump going to contact the Prime Minister of Canada about their economy? A: To find out how Canadians live off of less! Q: How was copper wire invented? A: Two Canadians were fighting over a penny, which they found on the street Q: How do you know Adam was a Canadian? A: Who else could stand beside a naked woman and be tempted by a fruit .. ?
******************************************* 
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NO OFFENCE TO BLONDES
 It's only a Riddle questions.
Q: How do you confuse a blonde? A: You put her in a round room and tell her to sit in a corner. Q: How does a blonde confuse you? A: She comes out and says she did. 
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Yup .. blondes have more fun, no doubt ..
Q: How do you get a blonde to marry you? A: Tell her she's pregnant. A man was in his front yard mowing grass, when his attractive blonde female neighbor came out of her house and went straight to the mailbox. She opened it, then slammed it shut and stormed back into the house. A little later she came out of her house again, went to the mailbox, and again opened it and slammed it shut again. Angrily, back into the house she went. As the man was getting ready to edge the lawn, she came out again, marched to the mailbox, opened it and then slammed it closed harder than ever. Puzzled by her actions the man asked her, "Is something wrong?" To which she replied, "There certainly is! My f**king computer keeps telling me, YOU'VE GOT MAIL" ... |
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Marriage and Relationship ..
Q: What's the difference between love and marriage? A: Love is blind .. marriage is an eye-opener! Q: What is the ideal marriage? A: A marriage between a deaf man and a blind woman! Q: How are husbands like lawn mowers? A: They're hard to get started, they emit noxious odours and a loud noise, and half the time they just don't work. Q: When another man steals your wife, what's your best revenge? A: Let that damn bastard keep her! Q: Why marriage is like a violin? A: After all the beautiful music is over, the strings are still attached. Q: How is a marriage like a hot bath? A: Once you get used to it, it's not so hot any more .. Son: Is it true, Dad? I heard that in India, a man doesn't know his wife until he marries her. Father: That happens everywhere, son... everywhere! Marriage is a workshop, where man works and woman shops. When a man opens the door of his car for his wife, you can be sure of one thing: either the car is new or the wife is new ... A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend. A successful woman is one who can find such a man.
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Yup .. blondes have more fun, no doubt ..
Q: How do you get a blonde to marry you? A: Tell her she's pregnant. A man was in his front yard mowing grass, when his attractive blonde female neighbor came out of her house and went straight to the mailbox. She opened it, then slammed it shut and stormed back into the house. A little later she came out of her house again, went to the mailbox, and again opened it and slammed it shut again. Angrily, back into the house she went. As the man was getting ready to edge the lawn, she came out again, marched to the mailbox, opened it and then slammed it closed harder than ever. Puzzled by her actions the man asked her, "Is something wrong?" To which she replied, "There certainly is! My f**king computer keeps telling me, YOU'VE GOT MAIL" ... I love this one
Thanks Buzzy for all the great jokes
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Edited by
Funzy65
on
Wed 03/22/17 04:49 AM
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Yup .. blondes have more fun, no doubt ..
Q: How do you get a blonde to marry you? A: Tell her she's pregnant. A man was in his front yard mowing grass, when his attractive blonde female neighbor came out of her house and went straight to the mailbox. She opened it, then slammed it shut and stormed back into the house. A little later she came out of her house again, went to the mailbox, and again opened it and slammed it shut again. Angrily, back into the house she went. As the man was getting ready to edge the lawn, she came out again, marched to the mailbox, opened it and then slammed it closed harder than ever. Puzzled by her actions the man asked her, "Is something wrong?" To which she replied, "There certainly is! My f**king computer keeps telling me, YOU'VE GOT MAIL" ... *************************************** Yup, I read this one some time ago
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Edited by
Funzy65
on
Wed 03/22/17 05:34 AM
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I have posted this before.but as we are on the subject,
Say the next 4 words quickly with an Irish Accent. Whale Oil Beef Hooked |
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There was a knock on my door the other day. I looked out of the windows and saw a Muslim lady, I went to my door but didn't open it. I talked through the letter box to see how she liked it!
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Edited by
Funzy65
on
Sun 04/23/17 07:17 PM
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I HOPE this pic JOKE may NOT be politically INCORRECT
I can live with it if one DELETE IT .. 
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Sorry, but this is not really PC,
Why are women's feet smaller than Men's, So she can stand nearer the sink. |
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Good one Funzy
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Just one more for you Moon
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Just one more for you Moon
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One for the COSHER boys ..
Two kids are in a hospital each lying on a stretcher next to each other outside the operating room. The first kid leans over and asks, “what are you in here for?” The second kid says, “I’m getting my tonsils out. I’m a little nervous.” The first kid says, “You’ve got nothing to worry about. I had that done when I was four. They put you to sleep and when you wake up, they give you lots of jello and ice cream. It’s a breeze.” The second kid then asked, “What are you in here for?” The first kids says, “a circumcision.” The second kid replies, “Whoa, good luck buddy. I had that done when I was born and I couldn’t walk for a year.”
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One for the COSHER boys ..
Two kids are in a hospital each lying on a stretcher next to each other outside the operating room. The first kid leans over and asks, “what are you in here for?” The second kid says, “I’m getting my tonsils out. I’m a little nervous.” The first kid says, “You’ve got nothing to worry about. I had that done when I was four. They put you to sleep and when you wake up, they give you lots of jello and ice cream. It’s a breeze.” The second kid then asked, “What are you in here for?” The first kids says, “a circumcision.” The second kid replies, “Whoa, good luck buddy. I had that done when I was born and I couldn’t walk for a year.”
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