I get a lot of hello messages. I say hello back and then nada.

Sometimes it's back and forth for a short conversation then nada.

I am not the most exciting person on earth, but it's starting to make me feel like I scare men away.

Does this happen to you?

Is that your immediate response?
That there's something wrong with you?


Not really.


You know how some people have on their profiles:
"Just here for the forums!"
Or
"Just here for friends!"
Or
"Not looking for sex!"

Some people don't put that on their profile.
They just act towards what they want.
Some just want to yack.

Some people are on their phone or computer just farting around wanting attention.

Some want just 5 minutes of chat, they get recharged, then the name on their coffee order is called, they put their phone away, and go on with their life.

Some people have sent out 322 "hello" messages and started conversations with others, and while they're waiting for a response they get a return hello from you and start talking to you until the other person starts responding.

Some sent a hello to you 10 minutes ago, were just about to sign off, you responded and they said "meh, let's see what happens," not enough stimulation occurs and they just go ahead with their original plan and sign off.

Some people are exploring free dating sites, set up a profile real quick, check to see who is online, send a "hello" to whomever (you), during your short conversation browse the site, maybe find it lacking enough people close by, so just go somewhere else.


That's a funny crappy thing about online dating.
Whether someone emails you, responds to you, converses with you...it's never really about you.

Everyone is sitting in a bubble of their own life, in their own head, compelled by their own mood, their own bias, their own perspective, on their own time, at their own discretion.

It's never about what you did, it's about themselves and their perceptions which is based on their immediate environment.
Which you have no control of.

You are only black type on a white background to them until they choose to start building a false impression of you in their own head.

IMO might as well be Stephen King and all of a sudden wonder "Some lady in KY stopped reading my book on page 13. Is it me?!?!"

I ignore the "Hello", "Hi", " hiii ", & "How are you doing today?", & " How is your day going?"


They want you to do ALL the work
They want to be entertained.
They are waiting to hear from someone else.
They want you to feed them information, so they have something to work with, or to agree with you & tell you want they THINK women want to hear or sent a scammer form letter

Hey

I rest my case

Written By: Unknown
Copyright Unknown

Little Sir Echo, how do you do?
Hello!
(Hello!)
Hello!
(Hello!)
Little Sir Echo will answer you,
Hello!
(Hello!)
Hello!
(Hello!)
Oh, won't you come over and play?
(and play?)
You're a dear little fellow,
I know by your voice,
But you're always so far away
(away)

Just Starting dont know if this is my cup of TEA

at this point in time to me,hello is not an interesting way to start the conversation its a sure sign of a predictable short term conversation

If they have nothing more to say than "Hello" I don't even reply, I delete.
He's got hours, days if need be, to come up with a message. A "hello" isn't going to suffice to pique my interest.

Neither does "I like your smile" and "I like your profile".. The latter proving they don't even read it, cos I clearly state I am NOT looking.

The same goes for idiots asking where I live. Errr... that's in my profile!

If a message isn't worth your while, simply don't reply. An interesting guy will have something to say, and it won't be a message he could've sent to 100 women in one go.

Men don't write to me. So, I don't know if I scare them away.

oh yes indeedy

if they ask name, what I am going to school for
or anything stated in my profile

I delete

if all they gotta say is hi? why bother

I think most of those people are " fishing" and don't really want to put any time into building a friendship.

I wouldn't give it a 2nd thought,if I were you.

Thank you

Honestly I get those all the time if they just have a Hello or hi and nothing else I open them and move on never answer those... at all make a effort if they want me to answer them..

I use to answer them but most are just that fishing they are not even near me so no since in wasting my time..

chicks do this to me always

You are very engaging from what Ive seen inni dreamz so I suspect what the others were saying is true. These men werent genuinely interested in a friendship. They were just fishing or idly killing time.

Most of the men who just start with "hi" alone, are generally poor conversationalists and not worth responding to .

I know how you feel. Men. Always leading me on.

ciretom

IMO might as well be Stephen King and all of a sudden wonder "Some lady in KY stopped reading my book on page 13. Is it me?!?!"

That's a good analogy. While I try to keep a positive outlook on all of this, and hope for actually finding someone at some point - it's important to differentiate between things I should and shouldn't take personally.

SassyEuro

I rest my case


Too funny! Thank you.


TMommy


If they have nothing more to say than "Hello" I don't even reply, I delete.
He's got hours, days if need be, to come up with a message. A "hello" isn't going to suffice to pique my interest.

Neither does "I like your smile" and "I like your profile".. The latter proving they don't even read it, cos I clearly state I am NOT looking.

The same goes for idiots asking where I live. Errr... that's in my profile!

If a message isn't worth your while, simply don't reply. An interesting guy will have something to say, and it won't be a message he could've sent to 100 women in one go.
oh yes indeedy

if they ask name, what I am going to school for
or anything stated in my profile

I delete

if all they gotta say is hi? why bother

I thought to be nice enough to respond, and considered they might not know exactly what to say to start out with... may be shy or something. I am beginning to understand that, it's a lot more likely they are mass messaging and have no real interest in having a conversation. I find that irritating, but I guess I'll just ignore it.




greeneyes148



I think most of those people are " fishing" and don't really want to put any time into building a friendship.

I wouldn't give it a 2nd thought,if I were you.

Thank you, good advice!


SDSCFof2


chicks do this to me always

Sorry to hear! I guess it's just part of the process for all of us.

peggy122
You are very engaging from what Ive seen inni dreamz so I suspect what the others were saying is true. These men werent genuinely interested in a friendship. They were just fishing or idly killing time.

Most of the men who just start with "hi" alone, are generally poor conversationalists and not worth responding to .

Thank you - it's been very helpful to read the input on this post, and I appreciate the kind words.


Goofball73

I know how you feel. Men. Always leading me on.

"Hello" and "hi", may be, the only English they know.

Hmmmm. I don't know. Some of us men can pull of a nice friendly Hello.



Hello Everybody