...but men can answer too.

Say you started dating someone right around this time of year, and by Christmas, things had gotten kind of serious - seeing each other exclusively, spending more and more time together, etc.

What is an appropriate amount of money you think your man should spend on you for Christmas?

Be honest.

For me....it isn't about the money. It's the thought put into it

Myself I feel that is up to him what he spends...

And it depends on how much you are both into each other..

I've never been a big one on going in debt for Christmas...

But on a average between $40-$100 is what I would spend on someone... if it has only been that short of a time dating them..

Perhaps because I grew up relatively poor, I never paid that much attention to how much money someone spent on me.

But since I was a child, I did notice that some people DO measure everything about a person that way, and for sure, if I note that someone DOES use money as a measurement, I will pay GREAT AND DETAILED attention to how much THEY spend on each person they claim to care about.

I don't want or need a Christmas present from anyone.

As for myself I would prefer time spent together..

$1 less than whatever amount will make me feel guilty due to social reciprocity.

You buy someone a gift, you automatically engender a feeling in that person that they have to reciprocate. It's the basis of civilization.

You gift me with opening the door for me unasked for, I reciprocate with thank you.

You bring me coffee on tuesday, I bring you coffee on wednesday, you pay for dinner this date, I pay for dinner next date.

If you buy someone something they are going to feel they have to reciprocate with something of equal value/meaning/emotion.
Otherwise it's a violation of the fundamental social contract and potentially a declaration of war.

If it's worth more than they're willing to/want to/feel a desire to reciprocate, it's going to cause all kinds of problems.

So, the appropriate amount of money I think someone should spend on me for Christmas is $1 less what they think will cause me to feel a negative emotional reaction regarding reciprocation.


If this is true:

then they should naturally have a pretty good rough idea of what that is.

Exclusively? I'd say around 60-100... something nice like a necklace, ring, perfume or maybe bath and body products.

Not so much about the amount of money as it is about what he'd buy me.
I'd like something that means something to me and something that shows he's into me.
For me the amount would be somewhere between E30-E80. Depending on what I'd wanted to get him, and depending on how much I could afford. I actually think E40-E50 would suffice.

But it is nice if you get one,

25,000.00 Italian lira.. and not one lira more!

Christmas is not about presents.

Yes, agree, not about the presents. Family and friends, these days is hard to get together.

I really think that getting a gift that a woman enjoys, is more important than how much you spend. I would way prefer that someone spends 50 dollars on a perfume, or a cute pair of earrings I love than on a 200 dollar necklace that doesnt suit my fashion sense.

It may not be advisable for you to go under $50.00, if it can be helped. I don't know many men who are talented enough to buy reasonably priced gifts that look CLASSY. Women are often more gifted in that area

I have helped a couple of my male friends shop for presents for their wife or girlfriend over the years, and always with favorable results.

What I ask them to do is take a pic of their mate in one or two different outfits , and in scrutinizing those pics, I am able to guage in seconds , the type of jewelry, handbags and clothes that they gravitate towards, as well as their correct size. That gives us a lot of options to choose from in terms of what we can potentially get for her. If you have a female relative or friend who is good at that kind of stuff, maybe you can ask them to tag along for their advice.

No, maybe not. You could argue that it's about being together with the ones you love. But it's also okay and really nice if you show that care and love by giving each other (a) present(s). I do believe that's the whole idea of giving presents to ppl you love ...
So in that sense it IS part of Christmas.
I have been with a man who couldn't be @r$ed to spend a bit of money on me -or time for that matter to find me something special- to get me a pressie and trust me, that's not a nice feeling at all.

Yeah, no kidding! Where's the little smiley face that looks like a Scrooge?

it would be something priceless... his time :)

I think a good starting point would be $50.00... then, there's the tax... and the wrapping paper and card.... before ya know it... there goes $100.00.. and she's probably worth it..

I don't want to exchange Christmas presents.