You got to learn to ask the right questions yourself. That's where most ppl go wrong and steer the conversation into permanent shallow waters themselves.
Many ppl don't know what to say or ask when they contact you, so they come up with something stupid like, "Hi, how are you doing today?" They got to say something, right.
They are almost always grateful when you come up with something that gives food for conversation and steer it away from that boring chit. They do NOT want to have a boring convo either, they just don't know how to get away from it, and if you can't steer it, neither can you.
You got to get creative. Playful.

So instead of answering "Fine, how are you?" say something like:
"Oh, I've had this amazing experience today! I went to Walmart/Barnes & Nobles/Starbucks/Whatever and I found this ..... that I've been wanting to get for yonks. I am so happy!"
That's happy, positive, cheerful. You do not want to tell him, "Oh, I've empty the bin and done the dishes. How about you?"
That is boring and will kill the mood and convo right away.
You could throw in a question of your own that relates to your story, for instance if you went to a book store, ask if he's into reading. If you watched a movie, ask if he's seen it too.

Ask questions that require an emotional and longer reply rather than a "yes/no" and a logical thing. So you do NOT ask "Do you have brothers/sisters?" --> Boring. Keep that for a date. In this first stage, do you really care if he's got siblings? I think not. Ask stuff that gives you an impression of the other person.

And watch some Matthew Hussey if you don't know how to go about it. Lots of free stuff on YouTube and the net. And investing in some of his paid-for work is really worth it!

So ponder on this, think of what you could ask a guy, write it down. That will give you something to work with, and it will also get your brain into a different gear when conversing with a man.
It's so easy to blame someone else while in actual fact you can so easily change this by coming up with different questions and replies yourself.

One more tip: Men usually ask questions. I've noticed they usually aren't even bothered when you don't even answer them but come up with something like the example above. Meaning they only ask question cos they don't know how else to get a conversation going. (there are exceptions to the rule, but those are usually a-holes)

Thank you so much for your advise, Crystal. I am going to keep it in mind and give it a try.

I keep running into this problem. When I start messaging with guys, they want to know about me but don't seem to want to share much of anything about themselves. It's a one sided conversation. I feel like I have to keep the conversation going. To be honest, I am over it. They can nudge me, wink at me, etc. all they want, but if they want to get to know me they are going to have to find the courage to share something of themselves because I am done prodding them for information. Do they think that just because they have started messaging with a woman that a relationship is going to somehow magically unfold without any effort on their part? It takes two people to create a relationship not just one. And I am tired of just talking about the weather or how my day has been. They don't seem to be able to move past small talk. Am I just impatient or am I just picking the wrong guys?

I keep running into this problem. When I start messaging with guys, they want to know about me but don't seem to want to share much of anything about themselves. It's a one sided conversation. I feel like I have to keep the conversation going. To be honest, I am over it. They can nudge me, wink at me, etc. all they want, but if they want to get to know me they are going to have to find the courage to share something of themselves because I am done prodding them for information. Do they think that just because they have started messaging with a woman that a relationship is going to somehow magically unfold without any effort on their part? It takes two people to create a relationship not just one. And I am tired of just talking about the weather or how my day has been. They don't seem to be able to move past small talk. Am I just impatient or am I just picking the wrong guys?

... those men/boys weren't worth the bother for you. they might be perfect for someone, but they aren't on your intellectual level... time was wasted, yes, but it could have been more costly.

Why don't men share when messaging