Trust is built on years while it might collapse within seconds. I abhor those who are not serious to keep their trust alive.

Yeah. Another point about trust: it begins within yourself.

Not JUST being able to trust yourself to be honest WITH yourself, that's just the beginning. From there, a person has to learn to design the structure of their own life and behavior, to make it as UNNECESSARY AS POSSIBLE to HAVE TO trust a relative stranger.

That means, avoid becoming either financially or emotionally dependent upon someone else. It isn't "love," when you NEED someone. If it were, that would mean that addicts LOVE crack and heroin, as entities.

That statement is food for thought... I don't think I agree with it.

Typically when someone breaks your trust, there have been signs that something was wrong beforehand.
Or ... what can also happen, is that your trust was misplaced, meaning you didn't pay attention to signs and red flags either.

I think in most cases bad communication is to blame for such things happening. Most people do not communicate properly or clearly and just assume what the other is feeling and thinking.
And sometimes another may say something as reply to a question that is not truthful because they assume you will get all upset if they don't.
Again bad communication.

So in that sense ... I think in many cases the trust that has been built was built on a false premise and assumption. Not on clarity and good communication.

Taking off from what CrystalFairy said, I want to point out another thought about the original post as well.

That is, that trust only collapses at all, as Crystal said, when it was misplaced to begin with. The main point I want to get to, is that it isn't just a matter of protecting others trust in you. That allows for hiding transgressions and lying.

The thing is, to BE TRUSTWORTHY.

I have been the painful victim myself, of people who, like so many politicians, CRAFTED their 'trustworthiness." They did not live it.

That is why I myself, ultimately stopped concerning myself so much with TRUST, per se.

Instead, I admire and seek out a sense of PERSONAL HONOR in others.

Someone who makes promises and then carefully keeps to the letter thereof is nice, but I have known people who did so, and yet were without honor. They would keep to their word, as spoken, yes, but they would not treat me with true care or honor. If I failed to have them specifically detail every possible transgression they could commit against me in advance, AND repeatedly ask each day if they had so transgressed, they would truthfully repeat that they had not LIED.

Like a marketer who sells a product which they imply, but do not promise, will deliver results that you desire, and when you are disappointed because it does not, they say "well, but we didn't PROMISE it would, we only showed you commercials showing actors using it cheerfully."

As I have gotten older, I do not trust any less. I am more careful on who I give my trust to.

I always wonder if people who start these trust threads have trust issues, maybe through their own deeds, maybe through the deeds of others, I do wonder though.

Trust is ultimately a belief, not a fact, not reality.


That's kinda vague.
And if you mean everything that is implied then it means you abhor every human being that ever existed.
Especially those that ever effected any change in any kind of status quo.
Welcome to misanthropy!

WHEN I THINK ABOUT TRUST THE WORD HONESTY COMES TO MIND...WHEN A PERSON TELLS ME

SOMETHING I TRUST THEY ARE BEING HONEST WITH ME. UNLESS THEY HAVE LIED TO ME

BEFOREHAND . ESPECIALLY WITH MATTERS OF THE HEART... I HAVE FOUND WOMEN

ARE FAR BETTER AT NOT BEING HONEST THEN US GUYS. ONE REASON IS THEY HAVE ON

AVERAGE MUCH BETTER SOCIAL SKILLS THAN US.

"Trust is like an eraser, it gets smaller and smaller after every mistake."

Is he talking about trust in a relationship or all encompassing trust? Without trust in a relationship... you don't have a relationship. If he is talking about all encompassing trust like in a business relationship for instance, times have changed. I remember when a simple handshake would do. People gave their word and that was good enough. There was a time when people had integrity and good moral values. Its so sad these days, you have to put everything in writing. What a litigious society we live in. Just my opinion and yes my age is showing.

Well, actually, the great times you remember really weren't all that great. The reason why a handshake ISN'T enough, is BECAUSE so many people cheezed out on their handshake agreements.

The easier it has become for scalawags to travel from place to place and victimize more people, the more we have had to add laws and written documents to try to inhibit them.

But I do think we've seen one rather noticeable decline, and that is that I think we used to have more leaders who stood up for basic honor. There has, since sometime in the 1970's been an increasing drumbeat of people in positions of power, declaring that if they can get away with it, it's moral and just. And worse, that if it makes money, it must be good.

I'd say that's a problem. But maybe I'm just a self-deluded OOF as well.

a word about ISSUES WITH TRUST OR OTHER ISSUES....I HAVE FOUND FOR EXAMPLE

SOMEONE WITH TRUST ISSUES , THEY SEEM TO BELIEVE THERE IS A LIER AROUND EVERY

CORNER AND UNDER EVERY ROCK. HOWEVER ONCE THEY REALIZE THAT AT ALL PEOPLE WILL

NOT LIE TO THEM SUDDENLY ALL THE LIERS HAVE GONE AWAY. EVERYTHING IS ABOUT OUR

BELIEF SYSTEM, THAT IS OUR REALITY. AND THE GLUE THAT KEEPS US STUCK TO THOSE

BELIEFS ARE OUR FAVORITE FEELINGS AND EMOTIONS.

Interesting and wise responses about a big word....Trust ( a financial term.....)

A person build trust as he/she believes to others...in days or years. And also a person can change or "delete" trust at any moment in certain conditions or situations.

We trust or not......we believe or not. Simple!