Open discussion~
When finally deciding it is time to get back out into the single world, how do you do it? I'm not in my 20's anymore and going to a bar is not the answer. Two points on that: 1) Just don't party, drink or stay up that late anymore besides who wants to smell like smoke. 2). NOT 20 anymore, do you remember being at a bar and seeing the "old" people sitting at the bar trying to pick someone up....Yeah, you remember...the "OLD People"....guess what? Those old people were in their 40's....it just isn't cool anymore.

So now what? New area, so no friends to visit or hang with or even meet someone new through...social groups? single groups? ...oh, yeah....got young kids....can't do that. Kids first alway...

So, where do the 40 year olds that are single go? What do we do? I'm usually at work, home or with the kids...so, what do you do? (besides the online thing LOL)

hey i resent that,that old fart trying to pick up those twenty year olds was me..

LOL, That's funny and yet...hummmm....maybe not. LOL

As you have mentioned there is online...not such a bad option.

There is also all the other places that us 40 year olds are hang'in such as at school functions with our kids, pay attention to your kids friends parents, there might be some single Mom of interest. At work pay attention to the people you interact with that are part of the work place venue ie the temp they hire, the woman that brings the mail etc etc..(but not working within the same company ~ big no no).Get out and about at lunch time in places where people hang out and relax for the hour. There are groups of interest and there are pubs where you can go to with friends. Pubs definetly seem more age appropriate then the clubs. Just about anywhere you go there is the oppotunity to meet someone...the real challenge is being brave enough to smile, say hello and strike the conversation...

worst case scenario your going to put lots of smiles on peoples faces as you go about being freindly and open.

Best Wishes

So I guess Pole Dancing 101 is not a good idea for 40 years olds is that it??????????

Take some classes you have been interested in.........and Pole Dancing 101 is supposed to be excellent for males or females........

You know what I have found is single males that have their children on the weekends go to Walmart!! haha so start stalking Walmart on the weekend...try the toy sections, they seem to take the kids there to buy them something.
Trust me, the men are looking around for the women while the kids are looking at which toy to buy!! My best friend and I go to Walmart every once in awhile on the weekend, you would not believe the single guys there...yep they are on the prowl too!! They let the kids look at the toys and they are checking out the females
So go to Walmart or even the supermarkets...they have to shop for food sometime. You can always tell a single man...hes the one with all the freezer food

Wally world the new hook up place, I love it.

Take the kids to the library too...I am sure there are single moms there with her kids too. Daddy might get lucky and the kids will benefit the use of the library.

Take the kids camping, fishing, picnics where other families go too. Go to a singles night out. They usually advertise in the local paper

"So, where do the 40 year olds that are single go? What do we do? "



Go to the bar and try to pick up 20 yr olds

JT, I don't go to the bar for that purpose. I might go there for dinner and drinks, yep, but only if I run out of Mcdonalds vouchers haha

I can only take so much of Wally World, but hey...toy section...kids keep busy and I guess I could check out the dads that are trying to please the kids with the toys...hummmm...could be something to do.*grin*

Pole dancing...not my shtick.....I'll go to a bar/restaurant to have dinner & drink, but it must have a pool table. That is my entertainment. Yes, I can play pretty good pool but it seems to just pick up the drunk, smokey, unshaven, slobbering old men. I don't care for that at all...it's nice when a nice looking dude come to save me...that always makes an impression....DO YOU MEN GET IT....WHEN A WOMAN GETS HIT ON BY A NASTY SLOB AT A BAR....STEP IN.....That makes a great door opener for the conversation...hint the "white knight syndrome".

Anymore suggestions for me or anyone else?

Oh, one more for the guys....go to the zoo with the kids on the weekend...while the kids are busy checking out the animals...check out the single moms walking around...strike up conversation and maybe end up walking around together and the kids all get to know each other....you can always take to to the snack area together....how's that sound??

not easy--
i am 46
not like it use to be. just take it slow.
be prepared for people to play games, tell you
what they think you want to hear, etc.
nothing is easy that is worth having.

I've heard most lines and I do have a wall up. I am cautious and yet have to at least take the risk. So, step one put oneself out into the community....
Okay, done that

i go to chuck e cheese.... theres alot of single moms there

lol

i agree- you do have to take a risk
you have to decide if the benefits of a relationship is worth the risk of "getting hurt"
for me it does--
you just have to be prepared for the people who will use your heart for one reason or another.
online- i think there are a few people who just want your attention and once they can "say" someone like you "likes" them-- they feel attractive and move on.
just like offline--

do you like blue boxes
<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<< look at me I am attractive

Wow, Soldier...your so, so...(panting) HOT in your blue box.

LOL

Besides being blue.....are you breathing????? LOL

I was kidding on the pole dancing.... only if it involved velcro would I stand a chance lol Yes I have heard it can be good for your health.

WalMart I can only take in small doses.... Home improvement stores offer classes for women, so not only can you learn something in skills, but men hang out there too. I always joked with my mom years ago I would meet a guy at the grocery or the bookstore as that were my 2 public avenues.

Depending on your locale, see what activites are family friendly. I like taking my kids to events as simple as PBS in park events, museums, galleries, pow wows, zoo, artfests.... look for state guides on events as many are free. The only issue I would have is just that, having my children around and being approached by someone. I am critical of body language, familiar with characteristics of pedophiles and looking for appropriate weak areas for defense tactics if someone would venture into my bubble space that didn't 'feel right'.... so would rather meet someone and get to know them 1 on 1, then bring my children into the loop once I know it could have a serious impact on their lives as well.

I too like the pool tables, but am very picky on location.

>hint the "white knight syndrome".
The knight in shiny armor in my opinion is load of shyt. No offense. btdt. In fact my 9yrdau & I talked about her opinion and fantasy of being rescued by a prince vs Disney's misaligned approach in demeaning females subliminally through film...