that there are a lot more people (than you thought) who are dating on the DL?
I'm way surprised there's this many married men & women on mingle and okcupid looking for partners, no shame.
My eyes are opened. Lol

Some folks are not comfortable with monogamy while others are and still others just lie about it and do as they wish.. human sexual behavior cannot be reduced to a single referent as there are degrees of fidelity and how one defines it...

Well that may be true that a percentage are here to cheat but I do know if all are looking instead of just long time members of Mingle that found spouses and their spouses know they are on line and in many cases have "shared" accounts. .

I know if I find a spouse it is a given that I would amend my profile, and most likely put it up only for existing friends.

But NOT abandon posting because it is a pleasant past time. And I have many long term friends here that are of various ages and statuses that would not corrupt any relationship I would have.

I however I find doing anything on the "Down Low" as deceitful and would be grounds for my partner to abandon me immediately.

When My husband was alive he had every password and account I had open to his perusals at any moment and as far as I know I did also. He was a part of me as much as my eyes or my heart so it would have been impossible for me to keep secrets from him. Not because he tried to control me but because I wanted to share everything with him.

I do feel very sorry for those who are betrayed and I think they should pursue their spouses with malice right up the courthouse steps and treat cheating like the life threatening action it is.

I think that if two people are married then they really should not be cheating. Unless both partners are ok with the other cheating... (in that case why bother being married).

I think that when starting to meet people it is good to know what each others goals are when it comes to what they are looking for communication is key and it saves time as well.

I think monogamy was created to reduce competition, for mates, among males. Thus, reducing crime. It creates a larger pool of available women.

It very likely may not be a natural family structure. There are many cultures that engage in polygamy.

Just a thought from a fellow monogamist.

For some yes they are out here, and yes they are cheating. Yet if we really look at it these people are going to cheat whether they are on dating sites or in bars, parks etc...

I have been out here for years, I love the forums and the friends I have made here some are lifelong friends. I am in a committed relationship and my profile states that. My Bf is out here and he is also a forum user..


My Pet peeve with some people is that don't read profiles they just look at the main picture and send email.

I guess it is wise to be cautious out here. And play smart

lol Well many bird species mate for life and we are more evolved then birds :)

Polygamy I don't really agree with that belief. But if it works for other people good for them.

My sentiments I know it works for some
I also know I am not one of them.
Either is Pancho...

Yes I agree

Yes

I was at first confused, then mystified, then shocked, and then depressed by how many people in the world pretend to believe in love, cherishing, and dedication to ideals, and then ignore all of those things for the sake of pleasures of the moment.

But I recovered. Now I don't CARE how many people screw around on each other. I am willing to wade through all the detritus I need to, to locate the person who actually does believe as I do, so I can have what's left of my life be positive.

By the way, when it comes to online stuff, I've come to realize that we should keep in mind that the people who lie, will lie about a lot more than the immediate stuff. That means that it may be so, that for every five profiles you read which are obviously from active cheaters, there may only be ONE actual person running them all. There may be a lot fewer real cheaters as there seems to be.

Take the scandal about that Ashley Madison site. It turned out that a ton of the profiles were actually all owned by a relative few people.

Yes but of course they're going to keep it on the downlow, because they want to keep it a secret. I never quite understood why a man I was with, kept telling me that he never told people who he was in a relationship with. Surely, if you're not ashamed of announcing your love for someone, why keep it quiet? Makes me think he WAS up to something, because he only ever told me he loved me, when we were alone in the same room.

.... there are a lot more people (than you thought) who are dating on the DL?
------------------
No, I am not surprised. Evil always finds new & improved ways to exist & feed itself.
My question is... did the world having access to the Internet hurt or hinder society? In what ways.. pros & cons?

As far as relationships, there are many 'cons'. Less human interaction. In about %50 of divorces now in the USA, 'texting' is named as one of the grounds & ' f@ckbook'.

*Dramatic Music*

I was actually more shocked to read
'mingle and okcupid' in the same sentence.

I sincerely hope the two aren't affiliated.