There is nothing wrong with liking someone because of how the look but if they have both the look and personality I call it a bonus. It's sad how a lot of people once they find treasure they trade it in for trash.

Are you making the distinction between "liking" someone and being attracted to someone so it makes you react in a positive way?


I would call it improved compatibility, personally.


What kind of personality considers other people trash?
Or compares two people and considers one trash?

one persons trash is anothers gold... i see her point, there is a lot of trashy people out there...

For me you need discernment to choose the trash from the treasure
I also believe what's on the inside flows out to the outside eventually

The 'look' is always our first attraction, it's usually that comfort that engages the first conversation. From there we discover the personality...and hopefully more transpires. So,ideally, the better looking,the better the overall attraction might be. A lot of times we are single so long because we didn't find the looks to go with the personality. Let's face it,we all know great people with great personalities,but we're just not attracted to them.
OP,i'm guessing the the 'trash' reference is because of a personal experience ? To leave someone for someone else who 'might' be better looking would be very shallow because they shouldn't have been with the original person anyway. So who wants someone like that ? Do you ? It's not all the fault of the 'trash'.

yep don't matter how pretty the flower
if you rotten on inside..gonna show thru

Funny you mention rotten flowers.. lol we were just talking about this yesterday. ... okay I guess you had to read the thread to make this A..hahaha

I have dated good looking men. I had a BF who was younger than me. Very good looking but he didn't stimulate me mentally and intellectually. One day, I met him at the train station. He just smiled this wide gorgeous smile at me. He was so excited to see me. My heart sank. That's when I knew that I had to break it off. He loved me so much and I didn't feel the same way. His deep feelings for me actually made me cringe. I cared for him but the deep love was not there. It would have been unfair to continue stringing him along.

I also dated men who were highly intelligent but I found them unattractive physically. I was turned on by his intellect but physically, he just made me feel nothing, no excitement.

Conclusion: I need both physical and mental/intellectual stimulation and attraction to be excited over a man. I have never really experienced both in the same man or I might have been married by now. Something is always missing.

A good start. Tell us more.

I agree. Reading me poems, or talking about science fiction isn't going to turn me on. I have to feel physically attracted to him. I can't feel any excitement if he isn't visually attractive.

Yep, looks may open the door, but it's a good personality that's gets you invited in for supper.

Same thing happened to me before. Now I know why men get "trophy girlfriends", but never understood why they never tire of it.

Well, ya see, them trophy wives, now they don't talk, they just sit up there on the mantle or in the trophy case, look'in all pretty like. All you have to do is remember to polish them now and again and everything is hunckydory. Now what man doesn't want more trophies? Hm

Yes, I do understand the novelty of it, the ego-boost and all that ****. But personally, I found it utterly boring after some time. All looks and no substance. No thanks.

Of course, I know that Ted Bundy would disagree with me, if he could. :)

A girl who cheats or breaks someone's heart is considered trash especially if the girl has an amazing guy and she ends up hurting him

As if the girl that does that would actually give a s h i t