What ever happened to chivalry?

Its still here, Like anything else in life its who you meet and who they are as a person.

I know right!! its just all sex sex sex now.. .... don't even get to really know a person.. just screw them and move on.... what a world we live in..lol.. God I would kill for a dragon to slay right now.. even if it meant he could kill me... I would still love the opportunity.....
. or a princess to rescue from that.. ivory tower... whisp.her away on my trusty steed... to my humble cabin in the woods.... and have sex sex sex with her...lmao ...ok.. make mad passionate love with her... better.. ..lol

.

Mmmmmm? I will save myself thanks.
But if you need saving I will send superman.

Not really.
But I don't really involve myself too deeply in a lot of other peoples relationships.

And just being a 3rd party observer of the relationship of others does not give me any real insight into their actual relationship.

At best I have a few anecdotal experiences with the relationships of others through very close friends, and family, where I am in the middle of their relationships on a daily basis.

But I still couldn't judge the quality of their relationship since I'm not them.

Other than that, I can't really judge the loss of quality of relationships.
I'm on a dating site.
If I was or ever had been in all that much of a quality relationship I wouldn't be here.
But overall, the relationships I've been in have been relatively the same throughout my life, in terms of quality.
As I've gotten older I've noticed a decrease in quantity and have had to fight trying to make up for the lack of quantity with expectations of quality just because "we're all adults now."


I really think you need to define what you mean by chivalry.
Is it behavior? Beliefs? Attitudes? Some combination? If so to what degree? And is chivalrous behavior predicated upon ulterior selfish motives just as good as chivalrous behavior based on respectful or altruistic motives, especially if the behavior is ultimately the same, and the satisfaction in the relationship is the same?

Chivalry was a fad...being a gentleman has never gone out of style.

The quality of a relationship is dependent upon the quality of the people in the relationship.

If relationships have lost quality so have people.

Me, I'm full of qualities!

Hey! What do you mean more like full of calories? Who said that?

I don't know, but why don't you tell us how men screwed that up to

So ... the quality of a relationship is defined by chivalry?

You know that even chivalry is a two-way street?
Too many women these days display an overly masculine energy and behaviour.
They feel they have to prove that they can do it all themselves. So whenever a guy is chivalrous, they brush it aside with a "No, I am perfectly able to do that myself!" attitude.
You think a guy will try to be chivalrous again? It's not a woman's prerogative to get hurt, men can get hurt just the same. From what I've learnt many men LOVE treating their woman like a lady, but if she doesn't allow him to treat her that way, you basically take part of his masculinity away, the primal male instinct to help and protect a woman.

Not saying it's just women's 'fault', it's interaction, cause and effect.
But as a woman you can stimulate chivalry by noticing it when it's there AND showing the guy you have noticed and appreciate it. Meaning you accept it like a real woman. That way you will get treated like a woman.

Like Matthew Hussey said: If he offers you his jacket to keep you warm during a walk on the beach, do NOT say you aren't cold. ACCEPT THE FRIGGIN JACKET!!! Even if you're sweating buckets. ACCEPT THE FRIGGIN JACKET!

And sure there's A-holes that haven't a drop of chivalry in them. You just steer clear of them. Almost every men I have met and dated DOES have it in him, in various forms.

You murdered it.

Oh crap, the Chivalry thing again.

Sorry for my impatience about this. It's because I've never seen anyone complain about it LEGITIMATELY.

For one thing, "chivalry" doesn't mean what the complainers always think it means. They never do any research into it, they just watch some old movies and cartoons, make a quick mental note that "guys are supposed to do stuff for girls because they are guys," and then when things don't work out, they whine about "chivalry."

Heck, most of the time, the complainers aren't even self-aware enough to recognize that they went after the guy they are pitching a fit about, because he DIDN'T behave in whatever "chivalric" manner they suddenly expect him to follow.

If you don't pick a guy to target because he behaves as you like, don't complain later when he STILL doesn't behave as you like.

Maybe they are worried that someone will get mad for not treating women as equals?

its no longer as highly promoted as male promiscuity and female 'independence'


men are probably a bit more prone to believe a woman wants to do it all herself, or is scared to do something that implies he doesn't think she can



but, chivalry is still there,, even if not as mainstream or expected anymore

I see a direct correlation with how women are treated as to how they act.

If you are indignantly independent, never appreciative, kind, or feminine; always complaining, correcting, and incapable of seeing anything form other than your own perspective then it is highly unlikely you are going to see a man attempt to practice efforts of chivalry towards you; he sees you as another man of which he has to compete with.

I am not talking about faking weakness or making yourself vulnerable to exploitation I am talking about actually communicating and expressing common courtesy when a traditional effort is made.

I can not count the number of times I have seen women charge at and open door and not even allow a man to open it or say thank you if he does. NO ONE is entitled to customs and courtesies not reciprocated.

Thread Title: "Ever noticed how relationships have lost quality?"

This thread's title asks a vague question.
What kind of relationships does it refer to?
What definition of "quality" is the OP using?

By the way, "chivalry" pertains to the medieval system of knighthood, during which women did not have the same rights as men.

Chivalry (from the Webster dictionary)

: the system of values (such as loyalty and honor) that knights in the Middle Ages were expected to follow

: an honorable and polite way of behaving especially toward women

Chivalry (from the urban dictionary)

Something women complain is dead even though it cannot logically exist in an equal society, which is something women wanted. It's one or the other.

My generation {baby boomers} were raised to open doors/pull out the chairs/how to do proper introductions...yes, even the farm kids were provided etiquette lessons through 4-H! LOL

So it's rare for me to see this not happen within my own social circle; but even though my son's 4-H age group were given those very same etiquette lessons --- it's sad how much of those just common place every day mannerisms aren't used as much anymore! IMHO



Equality; has nothing to do with basic good manners. Sorry, you've gotten such a wrong idea about what 'EQAULITY' was about!

Do you not open doors for any elderly human - help them into or out of a situation when necessary - do the same thing for some impaired human - or someone that isn't impaired but is struggling with to many objects in their arms and trying to get egress to a building/a auto...see one has nothing to do with the other!

Of course I do. I hold doors open for men and women regardless of age. It being polite. Others hold doors open for me.

I think the definition you quoted (which was from the urban dictionary) seems to say what I said before. As far as men, the don't know any more. Some women get offended and think the man is saying they can't open the door themselves.

I am well aware of what the equality movement is about. Like I have said in another topic, it started out as a good thing but like many other ideas...it has gotten warped over time.

I don't need someone to open a door or pull out my chair. I am capable of it. I'm also not offended when someone does these things. To me it's more about being a kind person than chivalry

If you notice the 1st set of definitions, it talks about knights of old (men) and how it is toward men

Doesn't sound equal to me. I do it to be polite

The round table...became square...

in order to have a QUALITY relationship, BOTH people must be of quality, if one person has multiple relationships and NEVER has a QUALITY relationship, then math would dictate that the common denominator is the one lacking quality and not the variables around it.