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| Topic: Divorce papers:o) | |
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Hello Peter, you started a topic. It was very interesting to reading the replies. Surely we have taken profit by sharing facts, experiences and opinions. I believe this topic was not only a long discussion but also a fruitful one, because we read, we understand (or do not) and we can buy from it. Thanks Peter for your openness. Please let us know when a new sweet happiness takes over in your life! Greetings to everyone on this topic! Thanks:o) |
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 Long story short and understandable; If you have the papers on you(Married) and don't have the others on file (Divorced) Titles and Warranties are non-transferable leaving you null and void!! 
That has been said before and understood by me since long. You have maybe not understood my question. I will not repeat it again, it's somewhere in this thread….. Peter |
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Edited by
peterbrorsson
on
Mon 11/17/14 11:53 AM
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I wanted only to have opinions about reasons and thoughts behind the divorce papers.I never intended to expose my private life here. In all honesty, I can tell you the reasoning for my 1st ex NOT cooperating with our divorce and my getting a divorce from him without his signature on any papers, was he told me when asked 15 years later: "You left with our daughter, took her from me. I was mad." I replied, "You were on drugs and abandoned me for a week. I had no choice." Pretty plain and simple. It was control for revenge that he tried blocking and procrastinating the divorce. Oh, then there's the fact that he didn't pay child support for 15 years either. It was also about money. I have no sympathy for a man whom thinks he can control a woman even from a distance. I can't agree with you more but will add: I have no sympathy for any human that behaves like that. Man or woman!! However, I was jumped upon when adding some info of my life. Someone told me that my wife was not here to defend herself. And I know that is correct, however I will not display the details of my life here where there are so many people that only seek problems. |
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I get what you're saying.. in your mind, it's over.. so women should trust in your feelings towards them along with your uttered reassurances, and disregard the fact that there's still a piece of paper (your marriage license) that's binding you yet, to another woman... if I may state the obvious.. women can be as territorial as men in relationships(as well as other areas admittedly).. we like to think we're the ONLY one in our 'mans' life.. and because there are women (and men) who take the sanctity of marriage very seriously.. it's oftentimes hard to overcome the 'feeling' that our MAN can't totally commit to the current relationship, until that paperwork is done! in other words.. perhaps these women ran because they didn't feel you were 'free' enough to REALLY be with them in a committed relationship, regardless of the affections you showed them AND you saying "trust me"! some may also perceive that without 'doing the paperwork', you may one day return to your ex (having unfinished business with them perhaps? still hold a torch for perhaps?) and are leaving your options open by NOT finalizing the divorce! that said.. if you have a flippant(or unconcerned) attitude towards the marriage relationship itself.. some may surmise that maybe you're a) not ready to move on, or b) relationships in themselves aren't AS important to you, causing the sense that the current relationship isn't worth fighting for! if you follow... tell me.. if you were reading a book.. would you start another book beFORE finishing the first? or watch a movie or TV show only 3/4 of the way through then change the channel or switch the DVD? it's similar in principal when you think about it for a moment.. the logic is.. finish what you've started THEN move on with the next project.. be it book.. movie.. or relationship! but that's just MY opinion 
Hi, that was a well thought and balanced post! + with a wish to understand the question! Look, I'm not asking this in order to complain, I'm just curious and like to have discussions! Flowers right back at you:o) thank you Peter..I have many curiosities as well and rarely pass up an opportunity to have a good, healthy discussion/debate! I am not one to pass judgement or force my morality on others, however if cornered, I will defend my values  simply put, my opinion is how I'd feel IF I were in that situation.. I'm more a "live & let live" type.. but I DO enjoy playing "devil's advocate" though 
Haha, so I'm the devil now! Ok, I'm not an angel exactly. Ah heck, toss that in the bin as I'm an atheist also. But lets not start that discussion here. I feel the presence of God Fearing Americans;o) Peter |
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Edited by
SparklingCrystal 💖💎
on
Mon 11/17/14 12:11 PM
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Cost of a good divorce lawyer?- $1500 and up. Cost of a divorce? She gets half or more. Moving on with your life? Priceless.....and phuck the costs This message provided to you by Goofball INC. Yeah, and I got to keep the car, which was really sweet :) He didn;t want the kids and me to be stuck, and he had a company car, so he was fine without our car. Got one lawyer, both paid half of that bill. Set us back some E600 each, then we had to wait for a year for it to be official. F*** knows why that took so long. All it takes is a judge to say "Ok", you don't even have to be there? Get it over with, the paperwork of this thread is more than my divorce's paperwork 
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Cost of a good divorce lawyer?- $1500 and up. Cost of a divorce? She gets half or more. Moving on with your life? Priceless.....and phuck the costs This message provided to you by Goofball INC. Attorney Poland=read mobster style+I'm a foreigner=rip-a-new-a-hole-in-his-wallet Anyway, Poland is the most radical Catholic country in Europe and my wife is deeply religious. I'm working on it! If I would be really bad, I have the means to bribe a judge or who ever come running when winking some Euro's in the air. However, I want to fix this in a good way, I have two children's that are adorable and don't want to ruin our relationship(That is my relation to children for you that don't understand) by going berserk with lawyers and judges. But thanks for the advice Goofball:o) |
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Edited by
peterbrorsson
on
Mon 11/17/14 12:38 PM
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@Chrystalfairy
Quote**** knows why that took so long. All it takes is a judge to say "Ok", you don't even have to be there?:Quote It's probation time if parties have a temporary disagreement that end up bad. It's the same in Czech, Poland, Italy, Austria you name it. Except in Sweden, it doesn't take long time as all is decided by state law, 50% properties, 50% children= split custody, if not possible with split custody, the person who can't/isn't willing has to pay according to his/hers income. Yet again, according to state law. This is valid also for people living together without being married. In Austria, a man has to pay her 40% of brut income until she retires. No matter if she start to live with another man. As taxes in Austria is one of the highest in Europe, a man is basically bankrupt when divorced. This was a couple of years ago but I don't think it has changed much…. Peter |
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Edited by
OnNewJourney
on
Mon 11/17/14 01:19 PM
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First I would say that you are right about insulting and bad manners. I should ignore a person when somebody is making up stories about my life. Further on, addressing somebody "like him" "He is" is a kind of insult, however sugared. I'll stop the insulting remarks now then. So you think I had these relationships when I was married?? All these mentioned here was in response to "men are not to be trusted" I wrote then that I had been cheated on. These relationships happened in my youth, none of them are connected with my marriage. Fine. I'm willing to admit making wrong assumptions, but not to apologize for the conclusions that still stand. You had these relationships prior to that marriage and now you want to get into a new one before completing the divorce papers. One of the arguments you used included indirect justification of cheating by pointing out the fact many married people have relationships despite the fact they are still married. You know what it is called. It still means leaving unfinished business and expecting the new better half to accept it, along with all the risks SHE should accept because you take your time and demand her to trust you without any proof. All you offer is your word without an appropriate action that follows it. Regarding rude behavior, allow me to refer you to my first reply in which I clearly stated: "Se, here is your free answer without any further clarifications." You have chosen to selectively focus on only one part of my reply, ignore the rest of it and ask for a clarification: "Yes, words are just words, papers are just papers and people are just peoples. As I was saying, when I was just living with women, not married. No one was asking of papers to prove it! What's the difference? And btw, what do you mean by throwing away money???" By selectively listening, ignoring what you do not want to hear and making rude remarks because you disliked similar replies you got from others, you opened a door to being treated the way you were treated. So, yes, you were addressed as "him" which qualifies such a behavior equally rude as yours. The person who demonstrates a lack of manners shouldn't rely on good manners of those whom he addresses in such a way. |
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Hi to all wonderful females out there! Well ok, if males are reading also, we’re pretty awesome also, huh? Now first some history: I'��m a sort of an overdue male of 51 year. I'��ve been through three +4 year long relationships and one marriage of seven years. Not a great deal of points in the "��game" of life, huh? But anyway, now I want to know something from you females. During the years before getting married, there were no questions asked if there were any papers confirming end of relationship. Now when wife and I separated 2010, I"��ve been meeting women who had interest in me until question of marriage and divorce papers to prove the end of relationship occurred. When replying there is no divorce yet, most women walked away. Speaking with my female friends, they have the same opinion. Now most of these were/is highly educated women with scientific education and brilliant minds. Now here'��s my 10 000 EURO question. (I will not pay until satisfactory answer occurs and I'll judge it;o) What is it with the idea of a person that has a paper that says he is married is not trusted when saying relationship is over, when at the same time, there are so many married couples that go over the domestic borders all the time. No matter he, she or it;o)]/b] It doesn't make any sense to me as I try to be rational and look at things in a logical way. Of course I can understand the betrayal of a trusted friend and companion turns the other way suddenly, but seriously!! I have been abandoned and betrayed also but have never got any idea of a paper making a difference of trust!!! Please be patient with me and ask if you don'��t understand my ramblings!! Peter If I said your analogy is stoopid and your question is stoopider would you consider me stoopid, rude, or both?... 
So you're saying because so many married people commit adultery the women you wish to date should be ok with the fact that you are married because you tell them your marriage is over?...Priceless!...What ever made you relate a marriage certificate or a divorce decree to trust?....Both represent many things, but trust is not one of them...I seriously doubt these women are "walking" away from you because you tell them you are married....They are walking away from you because they do not find you trustworthy... |
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This thread needs ... 
Agree! |
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This thread needs ...
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@Chrystalfairy Quote**** knows why that took so long. All it takes is a judge to say "Ok", you don't even have to be there?:Quote It's probation time if parties have a temporary disagreement that end up bad. It's the same in Czech, Poland, Italy, Austria you name it. Except in Sweden, it doesn't take long time as all is decided by state law, 50% properties, 50% children= split custody, if not possible with split custody, the person who can't/isn't willing has to pay according to his/hers income. Yet again, according to state law. This is valid also for people living together without being married. In Austria, a man has to pay her 40% of brut income until she retires. No matter if she start to live with another man. As taxes in Austria is one of the highest in Europe, a man is basically bankrupt when divorced. This was a couple of years ago but I don't think it has changed much…. Peter What are you trying to say? That you do not want to go through the paperwork because you don't your want ex-wife to get the quoted percent of your income, or you don't want to face bankruptcy or...what? Why did you bring out these laws? What do they have to do with your reasons for unfinished divorce procedure? If those are your reasons for still being separated, why would anyone believe your word that you are planning to divorce in future? |
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cheese burgers.
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This thread needs ...
Agree! That popcorn maker looks so familiar! 
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The plot thickens...
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Now taking bets on how soon this thread gets locked.
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Now taking bets on how soon this thread gets locked. 3 2 1 ... Any minute now 
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cheese burgers.
and " tell me.. if you were reading a book.. would you start another book beFORE finishing the first? or watch a movie or TV show only 3/4 of the way through then change the channel or switch the DVD? it's similar in principal when you think about it for a moment.. the logic is.. finish what you've started THEN move on with the next project.. be it book.. movie.. or relationship!" 
lol...my answer is yes to all the above...!! So I don't have any advice to give...and I don't think I did anyways. I don't think there is a right or wrong way of doing things. However more often then not relationships obey to maths. If you are in love with someone that needs to see your divorce papers...you better get them unless she accepts not to have them and understands your point of view. And considering society and the majority of point of views...it's probably up to you to get the divorce. Besides you said you hoped for it...so what is standing in the way ? It's as simple as that... |
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Edited by
OnNewJourney
on
Mon 11/17/14 01:53 PM
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So I don't have any advice to give...and I don't think I did anyways. I don't think there is a right or wrong way of doing things. However more often then not relationships obey to maths. If you are in love with someone that needs to see your divorce papers...you better get them unless she accepts not to have them and understands your point of view. And considering society and the majority of point of views...it's probably up to you to get the divorce. Besides you said you hoped for it...so what is standing in the way ? It's as simple as that... THAT is the key question. 
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First I would say that you are right about insulting and bad manners. I should ignore a person when somebody is making up stories about my life. Further on, addressing somebody "like him" "He is" is a kind of insult, however sugared. I'll stop the insulting remarks now then. So you think I had these relationships when I was married?? All these mentioned here was in response to "men are not to be trusted" I wrote then that I had been cheated on. These relationships happened in my youth, none of them are connected with my marriage. Fine. I'm willing to admit making wrong assumptions, but not to apologize for the conclusions that still stand. You had these relationships prior to that marriage and now you want to get into a new one before completing the divorce papers. One of the arguments you used included indirect justification of cheating by pointing out the fact many married people have relationships despite the fact they are still married. You know what it is called. It still means leaving unfinished business and expecting the new better half to accept it, along with all the risks SHE should accept because you take your time and demand her to trust you without any proof. All you offer is your word without an appropriate action that follows it. Regarding rude behavior, allow me to refer you to my first reply in which I clearly stated: "Se, here is your free answer without any further clarifications." You have chosen to selectively focus on only one part of my reply, ignore the rest of it and ask for a clarification: "Yes, words are just words, papers are just papers and people are just peoples. As I was saying, when I was just living with women, not married. No one was asking of papers to prove it! What's the difference? And btw, what do you mean by throwing away money???" By selectively listening, ignoring what you do not want to hear and making rude remarks because you disliked similar replies you got from others, you opened a door to being treated the way you were treated. So, yes, you were addressed as "him" which qualifies such a behavior equally rude as yours. The person who demonstrates a lack of manners shouldn't rely on good manners of those whom he addresses in such a way. Ok, As written before. rude manners is not good. I don't need any justifications from you or anybody else. I'm just curious of reasoning, papers versus trust. Peter |
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