Warning: readers discretion adviced. If u can't handle a pretty lenghty write up, den move ahead wit ur life of ignorance; afterall, detest for reading is ingrained in an average black man's DNA. Below are the Rules:


Rule 1
Giving all ur love, care, time, even money doesn't guarantee she'll stay: let me tell u what makes women stick to guys thru all season, both good n bad - because... they... wait for it, wait for it, wait for it... want to!!! Yes. They stick to guys because they love d guys n choose to stay with them. U must hv seen or heard of guys who beat up dia gals bt still, d gals cling to dem (nw I'm nt askin u to abuse ur gals).

Givin ur gals ur all may be gud, but is nt a reason for dem to stick to u, infact givin dem all in fantastic proportions is unhealthy. I will explain dat subsequently. So dnt tink she's still wit u cos of all the love n money ur showerin on her, wen its tym to leave u, nufin will stop her.

Rule 2:
Never make her too comfortable: u lov her wit ur lyf. She loves u even more. Bla bla. U devote all ur tym n bein to her, evrytin is magical, she knows ur hers for lyf, den a point is inevitably reached when... u suddenly
start lookin lyk an Bottom to her. I knw ur tinkin, dats nt right!
D more comfortable u make a person, d more d person should giv more. Yes! Dat is in sync wit logic, but women ain't logical!
Once in a while, dnt get jealous, dnt care, dnt spend, hold back urself. Let her run after u. Get a lyf aside her! I can't tell u hw importnt dis is.

Rule 3:
Family takes precedence over her: it cannot be overemphasised hw important it is for u to knw d people who will be wit u for eva n dos who will *** n go.
Never take sides wit ur gal against ur mama or sister. Its against d bro code of conduct.
Never inconvenience ur family to accommodate "one man's daughter". It will make her respect u. Once u forge ur gal into a wife, gud for u! She's nw ur family n shud nt be inconvinienced for anoda random "non-family".
Until u ring her finger, she's fair game, meanin she can dump ur sorry Bottom for anoda. So dnt be silly enough to enjoy temporary things n miss out eternity.

Rule 4:
She's not worth any emotional/ financial stress: don't struggle to give what u dnt have! Asume she requests for 10k, if u dnt hav it tell her "i dont hv it", if u hav it bt aint feelin charitable, tell her "i wont give, go work for ur money", if u hav n feel lyk sharing, fine! Give her! Relationships r to be enjoyed not tolerated! Dating is not an emancipation frm poverty!
Neva you hav sleepless nights for her sake. Neva you borrow to satisfy her every whim! This may sound harsh, but not until ur married to her, u hav no business dealin with her using ur heart, use ur head!! Most men make this moronic mistake of getting worked up over a woman!
God! Women r d emotional ones, let dem cry over d relationship, its nt ur job ******! Dnt kill urself for a gal, she would attend ur funeral with a new boyfrend.
A word for d wise is sufficient

Rule 5:
Always get even: women always think they r smatter dan men. Here's why - dey grow up to have huge racks n bums as big as jumbo size hot air balloons, n guys r wired to be attractd to wot dey see, hence dey can manipulate guys, hence dey r smarter! Guys who hv more money than sense tend to give more n get little in a relationship.

Y shud u buy her a box of chocolate on her bday n expect hand band on urs?? Get even! For every shoe she buys u, get her a wrist watch, for evry tie, get her a scarf, for every boxer, get her a pant (wait, shey boxers
r even more expensiv dan pants, hehehe). This sounds like a game but in truth, datin a 21st century naija babe is a game, im not askin u to win, jst get even. Keep on readin, im not thru.

Rule 6:
Love yourself first n more: lyk i said earlier, ladies think dey r smarter n wud love to expliot u in d name of relationships. Hence word lyk *mugu*, n phrase lyk #maga don pay* wer coined. If u love urself first n more dan her, u wont get her wot u hav never tasted. U wont giv her a treat u hv neva had. There is somethin called self love n self respect n evry guy shud hv dem!

Moreova, until u truly love urself, u will find it hard to love others without bein a wuss... lov ur gal bt undastand dat ur a human being too n desearve d good tins of life. Take care of urself too. Love ur life, u hav jst one left. And d final rule....

And the finale

Rule 7:
Understand who you are as a man: being a man is one of d biggest burdens a human could hav. Ther r previleges of being a man, bt responsibilitie s too. Undastand dat u hv to be on top of evrytin, ur game, (i didnt say ur gal o, i said ur game, hohohohoho). Undastnd dat dis gal would be d first to throw rocks at u if u become a failure in lyf tomoro.
Set ur priorities right, make enough money to take care of ur family, both batch A n batch B. Imagine good things u can afford with $10million - a gud house, good car, love, etc. Strive to be d kind of man u wud be happy to have ur sister marry.



Nota Bene: i am not prejudiced towards women.

When did they let you out the nuthouse?