"Women explore for eternity in the vast garden of sacrifice."

Do you agree with this? Why or why not? (read the article first)

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/lorraine-roe/before-midnight-the-self-care-dialogue_b_3570434.html

Yes, i think it's true that many women find themselves "caught" in sacrifying themselves for others. It's mostly due to women's nurturing nature and social expectations/patterns they finds themselves in, but it depends largely on the women's personal choices and awarness. i think being nurturing is ok (it's a quality), to be totally cut from self-care is not ok any more...

I like the acronym H.A.L.T. (don't let yourself get too hungry, angry, lonely or tired) mentioned in the article. As well as the quote: "Happy wife, happy life"...

When a husband loves his wife as he should, there is mutual sacrifice, and the wife can engage in self-care.

Agreed!

Single or married life... Self care comes first!

sadly, the majority of men don't feel this way.

I just want my "little patch of happiness." Is that too much to ask? (see The Other Woman, and laugh!)

Well I sacrificed getting a needle, for a male dr. Saying that, he did treat me extra nice. So it helped me to trust him. Still not completely over him. *sigh* . D'oh.

Women are nesters, instinct runs deep.
We sacrifice many things without even thinking about it.
Nature's way.

I do not hold against men that they are less empathetic
than we are.
They have those...muscles.
They can come in handy.

I am sorry Emo! Have you considered a baboon-mandrill hybrid? I mean, woman say men are apes anyway... this way you will know it for sure!

We are loyal, have fur to keep you warm in cold nights, can take care of those pesky insects... True story!

You should check out the movie Soufie.
It's pretty enlightening.
Especially the altercation they have in the hotel.
Great couple fight. They clearly know each other very well.
He's emotionally detached and she's a raging mother earth trying to find her passions after motherhood.

Oh? You know this how?

Which movie you mean Mariah? The Other Woman? I re-encoded it to 320p and mp4 it for a few friends. You can play it in your mobile...

Before Midnight

I very much agree with you but then I don't have children....and I wonder if a woman naturally sacrifices more once she has children...choosing to rather sacrifice as if there was no other choice. I've observed it with my cousin...and I don't see her as happy anymore.

I don't know, it seems really difficult to evaluate...

In my case I put my career aside to stay home and take care of the home and the children. Now finding a career seems impossible because of the years I put on the home and the family. I would do the sacrifice again, if circumstances were the same: family first for me!

Well, I'm constantly catching hell for looking after everyone else and not myself.
Oh...my ...god...

I'm a woman trapped in an old man's body!
That could explain why I kind of like washing dishes.

self care.... sounds so naughty ... yes can we talk more about self care.. ..
. just kidding. I will have to read the article.. when I'm finished looking after everybody else's needs...
.. could use a little self care myself

i love this line: (was in the fight scene)
she means it in the context of the scene
he asks her to have an unemotional, rational discussion
and she is offended by his lack of apathy just because she has emotions

Agree with the article. The balance in society (and thus in relationships and even within the individual) has gone out the window.
That is currently being rebalanced, has been going on for a few decades, at least.
Really good they made a movie on it!

And yes, like Soufie said, it's a primal thing, and there's nothing wrong with it. What is wrong, is that the balance between men / women has gone, been like that for centuries, so all of us have been raised with this imbalance.

From what I recently learnt, this imbalance is still pretty bad in the US. I've noticed that here on the forums, but also from my daughter. Her in-laws told her she herself shouldn't try to get things done from companies, healthcare etc, but to let her husband do this. When a woman phones, she gets fobbed off with BS. If the husband phones, things can immediately be arranged. She came across this a great many times now, even with trying to make dental appointments

Over here you sometimes get that kind of BS with garages, but that's about it.

Not sure of which movie it is but the guy in this case is correct.

Having said that, there is nothing wrong with expressing emotion, just not when it needs to be in a rational/important issue/decision.

When people get emotional about something their ability to make rational decisions/arguments/etc has a very strong tendency to fail. Hence why you often have to calm someone down emotionally before any sort of progress can be made.

TL;DR Listen to our brains, our hearts are dumb.