Topic: Too picky? Or Do I just want what's right for me?
no photo
Wed 11/27/13 02:41 AM
If it makes you picky,, so be it. It's hilarious how some of my offline friends are always telling me to give ? a chance, yet they have some of the most horrible personalities. I'm not even going there. If it looks like trouble it normally is. Some can be bad for your health. I've put up with ENOUGH bruiser's in the past. Never again. If it feels right, do it.

SparklingCrystal 💖💎's photo
Wed 11/27/13 03:27 AM

Friends I need an ear! I have recently been having a serious dry spell with guyswhat I'm a friendly girl! I know lots of guys, and that's because I've put most of them in the friend zone.
My ex was/ is a terrible person, yet, I gave him chance after chance.
My friend is a " nice" guy but he is about as much fun as getting a Pap smear... ladies back me up!frown
So, No... I've never gone " there" with him and WILL never!

I've told myself that unless I get that spark or immediate attraction, then I'm just not interested.
Is this a mistake? Should I really look deeper ? This is JUST dating, right? Shouldn't I only look deeper once there is a spark?

Help me out ladies... or guys! I'll listen to all who have valid advice! I'm tired of being ROMANTICALLY alone.

Sounds to me like you're still effected by what happened with your ex. You gave him chance after chance, but you still got hurt and now you are kind of scared to open up and be vulnerable again. That's what it sounds like to me.
If it is the case, it's good to realize that you were the one that allowed him to step over your borders, time and again. You let yourself get hurt.
It's very difficult to be open and vulnerable and yet stick to your own borders. I think that's why many ppl just sort of shut down. In such cases we'll have to learn to do both: stick to our borders AND (dare to) be vulnerable at the same time, which seems to contradict: borders = hard - vulnerable = soft. Think that's what makes it so difficult. Yet it IS possible.

no photo
Wed 11/27/13 05:08 AM
When you see a man you like give him the come on. Don't be subtle though, or he might not know whether he is imagining it or not. You could pretend to accidently bump into him and when you make eye contact say you are sorry and give him a wink. If he is interested he will seize the moment. I know I would.

SparklingCrystal 💖💎's photo
Wed 11/27/13 05:24 AM

When you see a man you like give him the come on. Don't be subtle though, or he might not know whether he is imagining it or not. You could pretend to accidently bump into him and when you make eye contact say you are sorry and give him a wink. If he is interested he will seize the moment. I know I would.

So if I get it right you feel the world got scr*wed up by feminism, the natural order of things is gone out the window, yet you advise we behave like feminists and start chasing after men? What about the natural order of things?
Have men lost their b***s?

no photo
Wed 11/27/13 05:28 AM
Message to CrystalFairy.

If you can't beat them, join them. There is no turning back now.

no photo
Wed 11/27/13 05:40 AM

Friends I need an ear! I have recently been having a serious dry spell with guyswhat I'm a friendly girl! I know lots of guys, and that's because I've put most of them in the friend zone.
My ex was/ is a terrible person, yet, I gave him chance after chance.
My friend is a " nice" guy but he is about as much fun as getting a Pap smear... ladies back me up!frown
So, No... I've never gone " there" with him and WILL never!

I've told myself that unless I get that spark or immediate attraction, then I'm just not interested.
Is this a mistake? Should I really look deeper ? This is JUST dating, right? Shouldn't I only look deeper once there is a spark?

Help me out ladies... or guys! I'll listen to all who have valid advice! I'm tired of being ROMANTICALLY alone.


I don't think it's a mistake Tee...Not only is that "spark" a major indicator, it is not something that can be generated even when friendship "like" turns into friendship "love"...Some will argue that chemistry is tied to personality and for them this may be true...I have found that no matter how hard I try ( and I have tried) if the sexual chemistry isn't there from the beginning, it's not gonna happen later...Since I totally believe that close friendships with the opposite sex are rare and beautiful things, I'm not willing to risk losing mine to a "test" run in the bedroom.....flowerforyou

SparklingCrystal 💖💎's photo
Wed 11/27/13 05:51 AM

If you can't beat them, join them. There is no turning back now.

So even the fiesty ones give in now. What is the world coming to ...


I have found that no matter how hard I try ( and I have tried) if the sexual chemistry isn't there from the beginning, it's not gonna happen later...Since I totally believe that close friendships with the opposite sex are rare and beautiful things, I'm not willing to risk losing mine to a "test" run in the bedroom.....flowerforyou

Totally agree with that.
Someone has got to move you one way or another, good or bad. If there's nothing, neutral, then leave it.

luvmeforlife's photo
Wed 11/27/13 05:55 AM
The more you get to know someone the more emotionally attached they become. Even if it doesn't lead to romantic relations you will miss them when they are not around. Give them a chance to seep into your heart.

no photo
Wed 11/27/13 06:26 AM

The more you get to know someone the more emotionally attached they become. Even if it doesn't lead to romantic relations you will miss them when they are not around. Give them a chance to seep into your heart.


^True enough, but not exactly to point...You can let them seep into you heart without letting them seep into your pants ya know....:wink:

teebee79's photo
Wed 11/27/13 06:27 AM
Edited by teebee79 on Wed 11/27/13 06:34 AM


Friends I need an ear! I have recently been having a serious dry spell with guyswhat I'm a friendly girl! I know lots of guys, and that's because I've put most of them in the friend zone.
My ex was/ is a terrible person, yet, I gave him chance after chance.
My friend is a " nice" guy but he is about as much fun as getting a Pap smear... ladies back me up!frown
So, No... I've never gone " there" with him and WILL never!

I've told myself that unless I get that spark or immediate attraction, then I'm just not interested.
Is this a mistake? Should I really look deeper ? This is JUST dating, right? Shouldn't I only look deeper once there is a spark?

Help me out ladies... or guys! I'll listen to all who have valid advice! I'm tired of being ROMANTICALLY alone.


who says pap smears aren't fun?


Let me grab a pen.... Now.... where do you go?

teebee79's photo
Wed 11/27/13 06:31 AM

Message to CrystalFairy.

If you can't beat them, join them. There is no turning back now.


huh I must have come in during the middle of this movie, I'm lost

teebee79's photo
Wed 11/27/13 06:32 AM


Friends I need an ear! I have recently been having a serious dry spell with guyswhat I'm a friendly girl! I know lots of guys, and that's because I've put most of them in the friend zone.
My ex was/ is a terrible person, yet, I gave him chance after chance.
My friend is a " nice" guy but he is about as much fun as getting a Pap smear... ladies back me up!frown
So, No... I've never gone " there" with him and WILL never!

I've told myself that unless I get that spark or immediate attraction, then I'm just not interested.
Is this a mistake? Should I really look deeper ? This is JUST dating, right? Shouldn't I only look deeper once there is a spark?

Help me out ladies... or guys! I'll listen to all who have valid advice! I'm tired of being ROMANTICALLY alone.


I don't think it's a mistake Tee...Not only is that "spark" a major indicator, it is not something that can be generated even when friendship "like" turns into friendship "love"...Some will argue that chemistry is tied to personality and for them this may be true...I have found that no matter how hard I try ( and I have tried) if the sexual chemistry isn't there from the beginning, it's not gonna happen later...Since I totally believe that close friendships with the opposite sex are rare and beautiful things, I'm not willing to risk losing mine to a "test" run in the bedroom.....flowerforyou

Well Said Leigh and I totally agree! My male friends are AWESOME but I'm not attracted even a little bit, but I would cry my eyes out if we couldn't be friends!

luvmeforlife's photo
Wed 11/27/13 06:35 AM


The more you get to know someone the more emotionally attached they become. Even if it doesn't lead to romantic relations you will miss them when they are not around. Give them a chance to seep into your heart.


^True enough, but not exactly to point...You can let them seep into you heart without letting them seep into your pants ya know....:wink:


who said pants?! lol we don't need no stinkin pants. lol

no photo
Wed 11/27/13 06:48 AM



The more you get to know someone the more emotionally attached they become. Even if it doesn't lead to romantic relations you will miss them when they are not around. Give them a chance to seep into your heart.


^True enough, but not exactly to point...You can let them seep into you heart without letting them seep into your pants ya know....:wink:


who said pants?! lol we don't need no stinkin pants. lol


laugh laugh

whattheheywastaken's photo
Wed 11/27/13 10:16 AM


waving Hi teebee!

I haven't felt a spark since college, so I don't know what to tell you.
Keep looking and don't settle would be my only advice.

wanna borrow my battery charger??flowerforyou


I need a whole new engine.

SparklingCrystal 💖💎's photo
Wed 11/27/13 11:20 AM



waving Hi teebee!

I haven't felt a spark since college, so I don't know what to tell you.
Keep looking and don't settle would be my only advice.

wanna borrow my battery charger??flowerforyou


I need a whole new engine.

:laughing: :laughing:
I just need a new battery

no photo
Wed 11/27/13 07:58 PM



waving Hi teebee!

I haven't felt a spark since college, so I don't know what to tell you.
Keep looking and don't settle would be my only advice.

wanna borrow my battery charger??flowerforyou


I need a whole new engine.


maybe start out with a little body work?

Myrthle's photo
Thu 11/28/13 06:47 AM
there is no such thing as mistake if u in the first place taught that you have dond the right thing,always remember a relationship always starts being friends not sex,because friendship lasts and sex is lust.

gmoneykaz's photo
Fri 11/29/13 02:37 PM
yes all good: love: love love

SparklingCrystal 💖💎's photo
Fri 11/29/13 02:49 PM


Message to CrystalFairy.

If you can't beat them, join them. There is no turning back now.


huh I must have come in during the middle of this movie, I'm lost

:laughing: