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| Topic: faithful, thing of the past? | |
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Is a committed partner a thing of the past? I used to think no, now im not so sure. Even when people say they are. Think I should have been born in the 50's or 60's - anyone notice how relationships from then seem to last a lifetime. Give me a quiff anyday 
What's a quiff? Everyone claims to be in committed relationships, when you mention open relationships one half usually gets jealous and says no. But when you committed one half usually cheats. And many people always try and throw an extra girl in the mix........not committing... The quiff being a Grease style Travolta haircut, right out the 50's! Someone will now tell me Grease wasnt set in the 50's - i never even watched the full movie! |
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(interesting how a conversation can go from being faithful to tampons, haggis & blackpudding and Paisley pattern, haha) Must email the admin's of this site and request a 'Tampon' forum |
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@ sweetestgirl11
Thank god I wasnt indulging in some black pudding when you gave me the answer to that!
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Hi krupa
Totaly agree, you dont get something for nothing, and its a team effort. At least, its meant to be 
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@ Simonedemidova
Not committing due to past experience, or just not the committing as its not the way you are? Couldnt do that open relationship stuff, id be the jealous half. Wouldnt committ to that, but each to their own 
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Perhaps I'm slightly jaded now but I'd say committed relationships are somewhat akin to rotary dial phones. They still exist but good look finding one.
Marriage vows used to say stuff like "...love and cherish, for richer or poorer, in sickness and health,... 'til death do us part". Now the vows should be "I do 'til I don't want to anymore, so suck it up buttercup and make me happy or else!" Disheartening really. 
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Perhaps I'm slightly jaded now but I'd say committed relationships are somewhat akin to rotary dial phones. They still exist but good look finding one. Marriage vows used to say stuff like "...love and cherish, for richer or poorer, in sickness and health,... 'til death do us part". Now the vows should be "I do 'til I don't want to anymore, so suck it up buttercup and make me happy or else!" Disheartening really.
I nearly choked on my morning coffee reading the rotary dial phone part of that post, comedy genius!!
Never reached the vows part in my lifetime yet.....possibly a good thing given how my previous experiences. Still, it takes two to tango and im not completely innocent. Not and never have been a cheater though, that im proud of! |
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I was and will always be 100% percent committed to the woman I'm in a relationship with, yes my eyes may wonder at times but what guys doesn't.. Just because I might catch a glimpse doesn't mean I would go any further..
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I was and will always be 100% percent committed to the woman I'm in a relationship with, yes my eyes may wonder at times but what guys doesn't.. Just because I might catch a glimpse doesn't mean I would go any further.. Honesty is always the best policy, so well done for saying it mate |
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Maybe the institution that came up with the words "Till death do us part" was wrong. Ever thought about that?
It's bound to have been the church, they've forced a great many things on us 'commoners' over the centuries and we gotten so used to it (as in brainwashed) that we now even think they're our own norms and values and the only right way in life. Most ppl have partially or completely freed themselves from church, started thinking for themselves instead of 'the church' as an institution telling them what to do. Spending some 50 years with the same person, pffff ... Throughout life we change so often, so many different phases in life. It's not like: I'm an adult now, I've reached the summit and I will stay here till I die. What are the chances of getting through all the (individual) motions and still keep loving that one person?? What is actually wrong with being able to change partner, find someone that is compatible with you in the here and now? We've always been made to believe this was wrong, but is it? Maybe we should just adjust our expectations and not assume we were meant to 'mate' for life. In the meantime, that doesn't mean that people in such a relationship aren't totally committed to one another. |
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Hi Brian
Depends on the person really I think. I have never cheated in any relationship I have been in. If I have been unhappy in a relationship I have ended it before looking for someone else. Jo x |
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@ sweetestgirl11 Thank god I wasnt indulging in some black pudding when you gave me the answer to that!
quite frankly I love a cute quiff but can't imagine ever eating this item called black pudding under any circumstances... maybe one of my weight loss goals should be moving to Scotland..lol 
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I was and will always be 100% percent committed to the woman I'm in a relationship with, yes my eyes may wonder at times but what guys doesn't.. Just because I might catch a glimpse doesn't mean I would go any further.. women look too. we are usually more adept at hiding it tho :) |
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Hi Brian Depends on the person really I think. I have never cheated in any relationship I have been in. If I have been unhappy in a relationship I have ended it before looking for someone else. Jo x Hi Jo, me too. But it only took me 6 years to do it lol |
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@ sweetestgirl11 Thank god I wasnt indulging in some black pudding when you gave me the answer to that!
quite frankly I love a cute quiff but can't imagine ever eating this item called black pudding under any circumstances... maybe one of my weight loss goals should be moving to Scotland..lol
Would just like to clarify that black pudding is of English origin and not scottish. Fried blood seems a bit strange, but just put out your head what your actually eating and its all good |
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Perhaps I'm slightly jaded now but I'd say committed relationships are somewhat akin to rotary dial phones. They still exist but good look finding one. Marriage vows used to say stuff like "...love and cherish, for richer or poorer, in sickness and health,... 'til death do us part". Now the vows should be "I do 'til I don't want to anymore, so suck it up buttercup and make me happy or else!" Disheartening really.
I nearly choked on my morning coffee reading the rotary dial phone part of that post, comedy genius!!
Never reached the vows part in my lifetime yet.....possibly a good thing given how my previous experiences. Still, it takes two to tango and im not completely innocent. Not and never have been a cheater though, that im proud of!
Why thank you. Comedy genius?! Music to the ears of a hopeful writer! 
I've also never entered into the marriage institution. Being committed into any institution scares the hell out of me! 
Plus I think marriage is just a contract between the state and the couple, not between the man and woman per se. Why involve the govt and have to jump through costly hoops if either party involved changes their mind about the commitment? A man and woman should commit to each other with their hearts and requires no govt sanctioned binding agreement to last a lifetime IMHO. Would you rather drag your dog along by a chain where he's unwilling to go, or have him walk beside you, no leash, loyal and loving? Disclaimer: Not trying to equate men with dogs here...just an analogy from my twisted mind!! You SHOULD be proud of that! Nice to meet another member of the "I wouldn't want that done to me so how could I possibly do that to them" club, bettter known as the IWWTHDTMSHCIPDTTT for short. |
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Maybe the institution that came up with the words "Till death do us part" was wrong. Ever thought about that? It's bound to have been the church, they've forced a great many things on us 'commoners' over the centuries and we gotten so used to it (as in brainwashed) that we now even think they're our own norms and values and the only right way in life. Most ppl have partially or completely freed themselves from church, started thinking for themselves instead of 'the church' as an institution telling them what to do. Spending some 50 years with the same person, pffff ... Throughout life we change so often, so many different phases in life. It's not like: I'm an adult now, I've reached the summit and I will stay here till I die. What are the chances of getting through all the (individual) motions and still keep loving that one person?? What is actually wrong with being able to change partner, find someone that is compatible with you in the here and now? We've always been made to believe this was wrong, but is it? Maybe we should just adjust our expectations and not assume we were meant to 'mate' for life. In the meantime, that doesn't mean that people in such a relationship aren't totally committed to one another. Traditional marriage does not exist anymore. It has been replaced by conventional marriage now. In this new contract, either party can opt out based solely on whether they are happy or not. I choose not to participate in such an institution for a variety of reasons, none of which include believing that I can't find someone that can make me happy, and I him, for the rest of our lives. I am more than willing to commit with my heart, I just won't involve the government in the affairs of my heart. So I agree that we should be free to be with who we want. I just disagree that we should jump ship whenever it tickles our fancy just because our fancies change over time. If two people really love each other, really commit and work on their relationship together and strive every single day to make the other happy, there is no reason we can't mate for life. I know it's an anomaly in the animal kindom, of which we all belong, but it's nice to think that sort of love and commitment still exists within some people. It does, I've seen it, and maybe someday I'll be lucky enough to experience it. 
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Maybe the institution that came up with the words "Till death do us part" was wrong. Ever thought about that? It's bound to have been the church, they've forced a great many things on us 'commoners' over the centuries and we gotten so used to it (as in brainwashed) that we now even think they're our own norms and values and the only right way in life. Most ppl have partially or completely freed themselves from church, started thinking for themselves instead of 'the church' as an institution telling them what to do. Spending some 50 years with the same person, pffff ... Throughout life we change so often, so many different phases in life. It's not like: I'm an adult now, I've reached the summit and I will stay here till I die. What are the chances of getting through all the (individual) motions and still keep loving that one person?? What is actually wrong with being able to change partner, find someone that is compatible with you in the here and now? We've always been made to believe this was wrong, but is it? Maybe we should just adjust our expectations and not assume we were meant to 'mate' for life. In the meantime, that doesn't mean that people in such a relationship aren't totally committed to one another. Traditional marriage does not exist anymore. It has been replaced by conventional marriage now. In this new contract, either party can opt out based solely on whether they are happy or not. I choose not to participate in such an institution for a variety of reasons, none of which include believing that I can't find someone that can make me happy, and I him, for the rest of our lives. I am more than willing to commit with my heart, I just won't involve the government in the affairs of my heart. So I agree that we should be free to be with who we want. I just disagree that we should jump ship whenever it tickles our fancy just because our fancies change over time. If two people really love each other, really commit and work on their relationship together and strive every single day to make the other happy, there is no reason we can't mate for life. I know it's an anomaly in the animal kindom, of which we all belong, but it's nice to think that sort of love and commitment still exists within some people. It does, I've seen it, and maybe someday I'll be lucky enough to experience it.
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Maybe the institution that came up with the words "Till death do us part" was wrong. Ever thought about that? It's bound to have been the church, they've forced a great many things on us 'commoners' over the centuries and we gotten so used to it (as in brainwashed) that we now even think they're our own norms and values and the only right way in life. Most ppl have partially or completely freed themselves from church, started thinking for themselves instead of 'the church' as an institution telling them what to do. Spending some 50 years with the same person, pffff ... Throughout life we change so often, so many different phases in life. It's not like: I'm an adult now, I've reached the summit and I will stay here till I die. What are the chances of getting through all the (individual) motions and still keep loving that one person?? What is actually wrong with being able to change partner, find someone that is compatible with you in the here and now? We've always been made to believe this was wrong, but is it? Maybe we should just adjust our expectations and not assume we were meant to 'mate' for life. In the meantime, that doesn't mean that people in such a relationship aren't totally committed to one another. Traditional marriage does not exist anymore. It has been replaced by conventional marriage now. In this new contract, either party can opt out based solely on whether they are happy or not. I choose not to participate in such an institution for a variety of reasons, none of which include believing that I can't find someone that can make me happy, and I him, for the rest of our lives. I am more than willing to commit with my heart, I just won't involve the government in the affairs of my heart. So I agree that we should be free to be with who we want. I just disagree that we should jump ship whenever it tickles our fancy just because our fancies change over time. If two people really love each other, really commit and work on their relationship together and strive every single day to make the other happy, there is no reason we can't mate for life. I know it's an anomaly in the animal kindom, of which we all belong, but it's nice to think that sort of love and commitment still exists within some people. It does, I've seen it, and maybe someday I'll be lucky enough to experience it.
Well, there are pre-nuptials, but ive always found that concept a bit strange. Besides showing an immediate lack of trust, its also an acceptance that somewthing will go wrong at some point before even getting hitched!! If I can quote something you said: 'Traditional marriage does not exist anymore. It has been replaced by conventional marriage now. In this new contract, either party can opt out based solely on whether they are happy or not' and 'I just won't involve the government in the affairs of my heart' - whilst I understand where your coming from, its a shame that for some people marriage is no longer a commitment made in front of god but a legally binding contract. I guess its a sign of the times that it now needs to be both, and its a real shame too. I like the idea of marriage, trouble is I dont realy believe in a book compiled a few hundred years after the death of Christ, at the council of Nicea. I just want to make it clear im not encroaching on anyones belief's either, im only referring to myself. Its not that I dont believe, its just i choose to interpret a higher purpose differently. Anyhoo, as im starting to go off on a tangent, ill get to the point I was attempting to make. Marriage via a registry office would then be the only option for me, and that unfortunatley DOES make it government buisness. 
Some good objective opinions here, keep them coming folks!  |
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