Newbie has got the situation pegged! Many of your ways are the same as my old ways, likewise
the feeling, I have a hard time not been a people pleaser when it comes to woman you like
So I ovoid all woman that present " these problems" as with "my" last girl I just put up a big wall & had
a two year affair meeting her in hotel's, until that wall was tumbled.
Three months after moving in I just had enough and sent her back to her miserable life with the
man she'd been with for 14 years , so they could continue mentally & fisicaly abusing one another.
I didn't know the truth for a long time as a spend time away, but he punched her front teeth out for sleeping With me.
this woman went through a lot to be with me but couldnt change her behavioral problems.
To bad so sad...its a year next week and I haven't talked to her since the day the cops draged her
away, I payed for a bus ticket and they put her on the bus..end of story!
I changed my phone # if I ever talked to her it would just be sad news ,I'm sure, so friend zone is painfull
When there f☆cked up & you have empathy for then.

Sounds like your minds made up anyways,

Good luck,

Very best

Wow. Sounds like my situation could be a lot worse. Sorry you had to go through that bro. Well I did some research on her disorder and it states the following:

TREATMENT SYNOPSIS
Individuals with this disorder appear to be having a developmental delay in passing through the emotionally turbulent phase of adolescence. Thus, in their twenties, they may have the emotional maturity of a young teenager. Like many young teenagers, even adults with this disorder have highly changeable moods, intense anger and impulsiveness. Self harm and repeated suicide attempts are seen in the more severely ill. Between 8-10% of these individuals die due to suicide. Like a young teenager, their self-identity is unstable (with their life lacking meaning and purpose), and likewise their social relationships are unstable. They overreact to stress and go from crisis to crisis. Individuals with this disorder usually suffer from 2 or more psychiatric disorders. Thus, 2 years after therapy, even though two-thirds achieve diagnostic remission and significant increases in quality of life, 53% are neither employed nor in school, and 39% are still receiving psychiatric disability financial support. Effective Therapies: A number of psychological treatments are partially effective, but all lack robust evidence of their effectiveness. Dialectical behavior therapy (DBT) has the most research support. Fortunately, after 10 years, half of these individuals appear to grow out of this disorder. Ineffective Therapies: Medication is ineffective against the core symptoms of this disorder.
Diagnostic Features:

Emotionally Unstable (Borderline) Personality Disorder is a condition characterized by impulsive actions, rapidly shifting moods, and chaotic relationships. The individual usually goes from one emotional crisis to another. Often there is dependency, separation anxiety, unstable self-image, chronic feelings of emptiness, and threats of self-harm (suicide or self-mutilation). This disorder is only diagnosed when these behaviors become persistent and very disabling/distressing.

Prevalence:

The prevalence of Emotionally Unstable (Borderline) Personality Disorder is about 2% of the general population. It is seen in 10% of psychiatric outpatients, and 20% of psychiatric inpatients. This disorder is more frequent in females (about 75%) than males. Emotional instability and impulsivity are very common in adolescents, but most adolescents grow out of this behavior. Unfortunately, for some, this emotional instability and impulsivity persists and intensifies into adulthood; thus they become diagnosed with this disorder.

Course:

The course of this disorder is quite variable. The most common pattern is one of chronic instability in early adulthood. This disorder is usually worse in the young-adult years and it gradually decreases with age. During their 30s and 40s, the majority of individuals with this disorder attain greater stability in their relationships and vocational functioning. After about 10 years, about half of individuals with this disorder no longer meet the full criteria for Borderline Personality Disorder.

Familial Pattern:

This disorder is about 5 times more common among first-degree biological relatives of those with the disorder than in the general population. There is also an increased familial risk for Substance-Related Disorders, Antisocial Personality Disorder, and Mood Disorders.

Complications:

Completed suicide occurs in 8%-10% of individuals with this disorder, and self-mutilative acts (e.g., cutting or burning) and suicide threats and attempts are very common. Recurrent job losses, interrupted education, and broken marriages are common.

Comorbidity:

Very stressful or chaotic childhoods are commonly reported (e.g., physical and sexual abuse, neglect, hostile conflict, and early parental loss or separation). Mood disorders, Substance-Related Disorders, Eating Disorders (usually Bulimia), Posttraumatic Stress Disorder, Attention-Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder, and other Personality Disorders frequently co-occur with this disorder.

Associated Laboratory Findings:

No laboratory test has been found to be diagnostic of this disorder.

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In short she's severely damaged. I probably haven't been helping the way I should be. It seems as though we're at a crossroads. I'm going to talk to her tonight about just being friends.

You push her back and she'll run in to your arms tight! I would be willing to bet my bottom dollar on that.
If you want to end it your going to have to chase her hard...ahhhaahhhhaaa isn't that f☆cked up..lol..

I like to say...the quicker you chase the harder they run, the harder you run the quicker they chase!


REALLY dont chase her hard in any case, but that partnerships a leaky ship..lol..

The friend thing with her.........I can see you just running back for that little "patch of fur"

Personally thats what I thought, a would be friends but give it 6 months but now its a year and

I dont want to no her" business", if things hurt you then its easier....I'm a runner, I like to run!..lol

Stick around, there's lots of cool people, lots of laughs and if you like to go thro your 2cents in

and give some advice its gratifying, its a form of happiness, one of the three.

Peace out

Lots of luck-u need it!

*
waiting for update!

Well i had a GF once who used to always tell me that i made her sick ?


{Chuckle}

Well we talked it out. We agreed to be friends. If something prevalent should occur over the span of a couple years or whatever, there's a possibility we could reconcile. She asked should we still have sex, I said no it muddies the water. So we agreed to take a hiatus in seeing each other for the time being. Been a week now that we haven't physically seen each other, and to be completely honest, I'm beginning to feel that cloud of uncertainty lift off my shoulders. Thanks guys for all of your help and advice. I feel good about how the situation was handled. I'm going to look forward to focusing on work and school, and eventually jumping back into the pool and finding "fishies" lol. Thanks everybody!

Heeeeeeey,leave the fishies alone!!


Now you are talking!!!

Am glad its all clear now.....your body was doing wonders for her-i mean,she did ask if you'd still service the physical needs!! Ha ha ha

I guess she wanted nsa??

Well,
Good luck with school!

Meanwhile,make friends on here and see how it goes!

I'll just add a few words on to newbie's

It kinda messes whith you head when things are great in the bedroom but these emotionally
detached type can just turn it off like a light switch, its hard on the ego.
You get rejected even when your supposed to be in a loving relationship with then.
There just not capable of having one, but we tend to take it personal, I dont care how strong
We think we are, were just no match for that!
Really, its because we're looking for logic & reason, why do we feel like "the man"one moment
and so helpless the next.its self destruction that breaks you in the end, trying to "crack the safe".

Good chose! Your the man now! Your own man!...stay the coarse friend!!!!

Dont be a stranger!

Peace out

Ponythink:

Thank you guys so much. I still feel rather sad it ended like that. I guess you're right, I'm unable to shut off the "switch". I'm still hopeful there's someone out there though. Thanks for all your help and advice!

update: She's actually trying to move back to Oklahoma and I'm supporting it. Out of sight out of mind type deal.

glad to hear.. nothing clears the air better than an open & honest conversation.. good luck with everything else

Thats perfect, you dodged a bullet there..keep it real.

So to answer your original question "are woman allergic to nice guy or is It just me"

Well you'd be happy to know that its not you.

The day before you posted this thread I herd the results of a new study over the radio.

It was found that woman where more taken to the man that had a scowl or grumpy look on his face

Opposed to the pleasant friendly looking men, time after time.

but men preferred the friendly warm smile from a woman

I guy was talking about how many woman he had when he was an A☆s hole

Thats crazy hey!

obviously an entry level accounting class wasn't one of them

(just joshin ya *hugz*) see I can even spell in gansta

soooo.... me thinkin' here....always thinkin'

does this mean that if I tell a coupleov the guys at work that I don't want to date them, they'll come over & do chores???

If the OP wants, I can throw him some mercy tail.

I can't handle as much as I get.

the mind reelsss....

maybe you should go check out the viagra thread? lol

Lol Id say don't bet on it.. But it's worth a shot I suppose.. One thing I took away from this experience is not to make time for people who don't make time for you. If it doesn't feel mutual, ask. And if it's not is are good you should just roll on. Life is full of opportunities, take them head on no hesitation.

Take them head on & some times you just got to head out,

Or as fishermen say "I'm draggn up!....good attitude!