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| Topic: Excessive flattery... | |
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It is natural for me to give girl complements, especially if I like the girl, but that is my artistic side coming out and normally I am trying to make the girl feel good. I try not to go overboard with it, yet sometimes I get caught up in the moment. I can become like the shepherd boy complementing the farm girl in the book, Song of Solomon. Well, honestly, I normally get a sense of chemistry for a woman, that I will go after. I will compliment, joke and just be myself and how I feel. The deeper I feel the connection so will follow my effort, in most cases. That being said, I don't ever want someone who's not into me feeling pressured. If it ain't mutual, then it ain't period. I won't play that game, and if I have to over strategize any of it, it's gaming to me. so judge accordingly. Not all that compliment or try to build up people have f'd up intentions. If what's given is not a gift you can receive. Then don't take it...  there are always intentions, and I would think we'd all prefer good intenet from others
flattery only becomes excessive (to me) if there is a motive that is clearly NOT in the best interests of the receiver....that is called dishonesty attempting to win a woman's heart in an honest matter is an honestly noble act, good sir. The world could use a few more gentlmen  
Thanks, sweetest. The vibe has to flow equally and In many ways I won't try too hard for any woman, especially if my gifts aren't received well... I am very realistic and balanced in my ways from my perspective. Honesty to me is key. So I go with that. I will also give them my worst attributes that I see in me, when the time is appropriate and lends itself to that subject of conversation, to help them make their own decision. It's what right..IMO .
We all have something to offer. When that flows as a give and take with another the results are wonderful. When you allow someone to see the worst in you, do you set something up on purpose, or do you tell her that you have faults and let things occur naturally? I let it flow naturally with the conversation. I'm not looking for anything unnatural in any way and dont create a "list". Sharing whats real in my awareness of self, so they can get to know the actual me...I don't pretend and want no gain from something other.
I think we have an "actual me" that only a few get to see (in my case anyway) and our "actual me's can be pretty awesome...oops that might be excessive flattery 
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Nothing worse than fake flattery, or obvious buttering up, see it all the time in the Mingle forums. Of course some on the receiving end lap it up so you can't really blame the ones handing them out. Exactly Torgo except I do blame the ones handing it out because they are manipulators who are willing to use others to fulfill their needs, whatever those needs might be...I read the OP as a point Greeneyes is making about relationships "in general", not just romantic relationships, all types of relationships....AND Claire, I totally agree with you...I am suspicious of people who lay it on thick, lay it on constantly, and agree with everything that is said by everyone who says it even when it is a direct contradiction to what they stated in prior conversations... These types seem blinded by an excessive need for attention that could stem from any number of personal problems...If they don't realize how transparent their BS is to the majority, they are certainly not going to be conscious of the damage they can and do inflict on people who, for what ever reason(s), lap up this fake flattery....I avoid them like the plague they are...
You ask what happens after they get their "sale".....The product they are selling is usually returned due to false advertising.... |
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Ha! You are all amatures....
You don't give excessive flattery .... Or you don't accept excessive flattery.... Obviously the problem is you..... If the problem is you won't accept some good brown nosing...you are stuck up...flirt with your self...see how far it gets you. You refuse to flirt excessively? Great!...I will flirt like a mad man.....and I will score that tail. So....you kids go on with being shy and repressed I will make those chicks feel sexy. |
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We're all different...I tend to be pretty low-key...I don't want or expect to be complimented on my "looks." The only exception is when I've gone the extra-mile to get dressed-up for a special event and definitely look "different" than normal.. But even then I prefer a simple compliment. (Nothing lavish or extravagant!)...I don't "market" myself based on the way I look on my "outside." My focus is more on who I am on my "inside."...So lavish compliments about my outer appearance seem odd and foreign to me...And lavish and extravagant compliments in general seem foreign to me...In my family we tend to say "good job" or "good idea" and keep things simple...We don't hold back on praise or compliments when we feel they are deserved. But I guess we're just low-key versus "grandiose" or ? Anyway we're all different. (That's for sure!)
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Some people just like getting All the attention! And, when they see others getting more attention than they are, then they may butter you up, just so they can still get someones attention.
I like flattery to a point. I usually can tell if a person is real or not before little time passes.
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"We"????
Are you French? You "low key " people wouldn't have a clue about proper schmoozing /flirting /brown nose techniques ... Leave the heavy work to us whores. |
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I have zero problem leaving fakery to other people.
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"We"???? Are you French? You "low key " people wouldn't have a clue about proper schmoozing /flirting /brown nose techniques ... Leave the heavy work to us whores. |
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Yeah.....I know....,
Ya gotta remember that each individual needs to have their butt kissed according to their own tastes....otherwise these delicate little jungle orchids can't flourish and blossom. Kinda goes with the proper way to distribute excessive flattery. Welcome to reality. |
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I like goofing off on here because there's lots of people to meet
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Nothing worse than fake flattery, or obvious buttering up, see it all the time in the Mingle forums. Of course some on the receiving end lap it up so you can't really blame the ones handing them out. Exactly Torgo except I do blame the ones handing it out because they are manipulators who are willing to use others to fulfill their needs, whatever those needs might be...I read the OP as a point Greeneyes is making about relationships "in general", not just romantic relationships, all types of relationships....AND Claire, I totally agree with you...I am suspicious of people who lay it on thick, lay it on constantly, and agree with everything that is said by everyone who says it even when it is a direct contradiction to what they stated in prior conversations... These types seem blinded by an excessive need for attention that could stem from any number of personal problems...If they don't realize how transparent their BS is to the majority, they are certainly not going to be conscious of the damage they can and do inflict on people who, for what ever reason(s), lap up this fake flattery....I avoid them like the plague they are...
You ask what happens after they get their "sale".....The product they are selling is usually returned due to false advertising.... I think some of it is about "mastering the art", playing games, killing boredom...Those people are not a big deal because their transparency and egocentricity make them pretty easy to spot and even easier to write off if you so choose (though you would never convince them of that ) ...It's the peeps who use other peeps through deceptions like fake flattery or azz kissing to get what they want rather than hard work or honesty just because they can, just because they see an opportunity and take it....Those are the peeps that turn my stomach...
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Yeah.....I know...., Ya gotta remember that each individual needs to have their butt kissed according to their own tastes....otherwise these delicate little jungle orchids can't flourish and blossom. Kinda goes with the proper way to distribute excessive flattery. Welcome to reality. |
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An 11-year-old said that? What a disturbed child he must have been. How did he even know what rape was? I shudder to think what his home life must have been like.
I trust that nothing really came of his nasty threat. Like you say, a horrible way to make an impression. |
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Some people just like getting All the attention! And, when they see others getting more attention than they are, then they may butter you up, just so they can still get someones attention. I like flattery to a point. I usually can tell if a person is real or not before little time passes.
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I see krupa got things stirred up again....
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The problem lies in that, politeness has become so rare many mistake it for flattery....
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The problem lies in that, politeness has become so rare many mistake it for flattery....
may be some truth to this 
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You can tell when I am drunk cuz my tongue gets loose.
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I see krupa got things stirred up again....
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