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| Topic: Subject Is In The Air | |
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So it seems to be a lot of different threads on this subject...so I'll put up my recent experience..sure could use some opinions.
 2 or so months ago I started talking to someone from a diferant site. We talked constantly...texts,phone, pics, ect. ect.ect. Started feeling very close and very infatuated with him.Spilled our entire lives to each other. Due to our schedules there's not a lot of personal time for dating. So you guessed it, our first date...BAM! 2nd date...BAM!  Then the weirdness started.  I don't regret a thing except for the fact that my emotions went soaring. He feels like it's all to fast and he's not sure if he wants a full- blown relationship just yet after a really bad marriage that ended 10 yrs ago..  We're still talking... but it's differant now. I found out he is still talking with other and new women on dating sites. He says he's not seeing anyone else and that he's just trying to have some fun. I am trying to back off so I don't totally loose him. I should just forget him, but I can't.
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advice from my favorite character,, MaDear
"If somebody wants to walk out of your life, let - them - go! Some people are meant to come into your life for a lifetime, some for only a season and you got to know which is which. And you're always messing up when you mix those seasonal people up with lifetime expectations. I put everybody that comes into my life in the category of a tree. Some people are like leaves on a tree. When the wind blows, they're over there... wind blow that way they over here... they're unstable. When the seasons change they wither and die, they're gone. That's alright. Most people are like that, they're not there to do anything but take from the tree and give shade every now and then. That's all they can do. But don't get mad at people like that, that's who they are. That's all they were put on this earth to be. A leaf. Some people are like a branch on that tree. You have to be careful with those branches too, cause they'll fool you. They'll make you think they're a good friend and they're real strong but the minute you step out there on them, they'll break and leave you high and dry. But if you find 2 or 3 people in your life that's like the roots at the bottom of that tree you are blessed. Those are the kind of people that aren't going nowhere. They aren't worried about being seen, nobody has to know that they know you, they don't have to know what they're doing for you but if those roots weren't there, that tree couldn't live. A tree could have a hundred million branches but it only takes a few roots down at the bottom to make sure that tree gets everything it needs. When you get some roots, hold on to them but the rest of it... just let it go. Let folks go." |
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So it seems to be a lot of different threads on this subject...so I'll put up my recent experience..sure could use some opinions. 2 or so months ago I started talking to someone from a diferant site. We talked constantly...texts,phone, pics, ect. ect.ect. Started feeling very close and very infatuated with him.Spilled our entire lives to each other. Due to our schedules there's not a lot of personal time for dating. So you guessed it, our first date...BAM! 2nd date...BAM! Then the weirdness started. I don't regret a thing except for the fact that my emotions went soaring. He feels like it's all to fast and he's not sure if he wants a full- blown relationship just yet after a really bad marriage that ended 10 yrs ago.. We're still talking... but it's differant now. I found out he is still talking with other and new women on dating sites. He says he's not seeing anyone else and that he's just trying to have some fun. I am trying to back off so I don't totally loose him. I should just forget him, but I can't. I empathize with you. Don't believe him when he tells you he's not seeing anybody else. That's rarely the case with these dating sites anyway. Although I do give the guy some credit for at least admitting he's 'having some fun' with other women. That part is most likely true. >>> Attachment is a matter of choice. Good luck, and I hope you do what is best for you... |
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I personally make it clear that YES I do want to date but NO I am in no hurry to be TIED DOWN YET! It is Gouche` to me for a guy to date more than one woman at a time. However if I am just 'going out' with a woman that is different. I go out with friends. I go out to meet new people. I date a woman I have something more serious going on with. But to go out twice and assume love is jumping the gun!
I think you need to take a deep breath and assess your personal situation before deciding if you are yourself hot to get involved again! Haste is the fastest path to misery! |
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advice from my favorite character,, MaDear "If somebody wants to walk out of your life, let - them - go! Some people are meant to come into your life for a lifetime, some for only a season and you got to know which is which. And you're always messing up when you mix those seasonal people up with lifetime expectations. I put everybody that comes into my life in the category of a tree. Some people are like leaves on a tree. When the wind blows, they're over there... wind blow that way they over here... they're unstable. When the seasons change they wither and die, they're gone. That's alright. Most people are like that, they're not there to do anything but take from the tree and give shade every now and then. That's all they can do. But don't get mad at people like that, that's who they are. That's all they were put on this earth to be. A leaf. Some people are like a branch on that tree. You have to be careful with those branches too, cause they'll fool you. They'll make you think they're a good friend and they're real strong but the minute you step out there on them, they'll break and leave you high and dry. But if you find 2 or 3 people in your life that's like the roots at the bottom of that tree you are blessed. Those are the kind of people that aren't going nowhere. They aren't worried about being seen, nobody has to know that they know you, they don't have to know what they're doing for you but if those roots weren't there, that tree couldn't live. A tree could have a hundred million branches but it only takes a few roots down at the bottom to make sure that tree gets everything it needs. When you get some roots, hold on to them but the rest of it... just let it go. Let folks go." I like your tree analogy. I think I'm gonna go draw me a tree and put some names on those leaves. Lol. |
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advice from my favorite character,, MaDear "If somebody wants to walk out of your life, let - them - go! Some people are meant to come into your life for a lifetime, some for only a season and you got to know which is which. And you're always messing up when you mix those seasonal people up with lifetime expectations. I put everybody that comes into my life in the category of a tree. Some people are like leaves on a tree. When the wind blows, they're over there... wind blow that way they over here... they're unstable. When the seasons change they wither and die, they're gone. That's alright. Most people are like that, they're not there to do anything but take from the tree and give shade every now and then. That's all they can do. But don't get mad at people like that, that's who they are. That's all they were put on this earth to be. A leaf. Some people are like a branch on that tree. You have to be careful with those branches too, cause they'll fool you. They'll make you think they're a good friend and they're real strong but the minute you step out there on them, they'll break and leave you high and dry. But if you find 2 or 3 people in your life that's like the roots at the bottom of that tree you are blessed. Those are the kind of people that aren't going nowhere. They aren't worried about being seen, nobody has to know that they know you, they don't have to know what they're doing for you but if those roots weren't there, that tree couldn't live. A tree could have a hundred million branches but it only takes a few roots down at the bottom to make sure that tree gets everything it needs. When you get some roots, hold on to them but the rest of it... just let it go. Let folks go." I like your tree analogy. I think I'm gonna go draw me a tree and put some names on those leaves. Lol. lol, kewl art and music soothes the soul,,,,, |
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Enjoy what you shared however, listen to the voice in your head. It has some really good ideas. I am sorry to hear you are nursing some confused feelings.
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Mmmm ended 10 years ago eh?
A bit long to still use as an excuse. Very telling. |
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The impression I get of this guy you speak of, is that he is trying to hold you back from dating others. If he wants to fling himself around with various women, then I see no reason why you shouldn't have options. He obviously does, so why not you aswell? Once a player, always a player. People find it hard to change themselves. It's up to you. I just don't understand why people never want the best for themselves. You were obviously concerned enough that you posted a topic about it, so I can see how it's hurting you. It could get worse. It may not. I wish you the best
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So it seems to be a lot of different threads on this subject...so I'll put up my recent experience..sure could use some opinions. 2 or so months ago I started talking to someone from a diferant site. We talked constantly...texts,phone, pics, ect. ect.ect. Started feeling very close and very infatuated with him.Spilled our entire lives to each other. Due to our schedules there's not a lot of personal time for dating. So you guessed it, our first date...BAM! 2nd date...BAM! Then the weirdness started. I don't regret a thing except for the fact that my emotions went soaring. He feels like it's all to fast and he's not sure if he wants a full- blown relationship just yet after a really bad marriage that ended 10 yrs ago.. We're still talking... but it's differant now. I found out he is still talking with other and new women on dating sites. He says he's not seeing anyone else and that he's just trying to have some fun. I am trying to back off so I don't totally loose him. I should just forget him, but I can't. yup sounds like ya slept with him too soon - if he's not mature enough to handle it - or the user type who took advantage, he's not worth worrying about - you can also continue to talk to otheres and my advice is to do - pronto and Never break the 3 date rule...except make it 5 or 6 |
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Listen to yourself. How do feel about him talking to other women on other sites? It sounds like he is not into committing.
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the other thing I will say about the OP story is that this experience answers the question guys - that you ask - why wont we sleep with you right away?
read the OP - the answer is there - it's classic - guys pull this exacto stuff ALLLL the time 
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the other thing I will say about the OP story is that this experience answers the question guys - that you ask - why wont we sleep with you right away? read the OP - the answer is there - it's classic - guys pull this exacto stuff ALLLL the time Tis true. He sounds like a liar and square. So not cool to lead someone on like that. |
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Edited by
MariahsFantasy
on
Sat 09/22/12 04:18 PM
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People are such cowards.
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Welcome to online dating.
It takes A LOT longer to really get to know someone when you meet online. And, there the majority of those looking for love online (both men and women) are playing games. They are looking for sex, ego boosts and adrenaline rushes. Be careful. |
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Dam some guys never grow up. I am not there yet but on my way.
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If he's still using a marriage that ended 10 years ago as an excuse, it sounds like he has commitment issues at the very least. Be wary of that.
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advice from my favorite character,, MaDear "If somebody wants to walk out of your life, let - them - go! Some people are meant to come into your life for a lifetime, some for only a season and you got to know which is which. And you're always messing up when you mix those seasonal people up with lifetime expectations. I put everybody that comes into my life in the category of a tree. Some people are like leaves on a tree. When the wind blows, they're over there... wind blow that way they over here... they're unstable. When the seasons change they wither and die, they're gone. That's alright. Most people are like that, they're not there to do anything but take from the tree and give shade every now and then. That's all they can do. But don't get mad at people like that, that's who they are. That's all they were put on this earth to be. A leaf. Some people are like a branch on that tree. You have to be careful with those branches too, cause they'll fool you. They'll make you think they're a good friend and they're real strong but the minute you step out there on them, they'll break and leave you high and dry. But if you find 2 or 3 people in your life that's like the roots at the bottom of that tree you are blessed. Those are the kind of people that aren't going nowhere. They aren't worried about being seen, nobody has to know that they know you, they don't have to know what they're doing for you but if those roots weren't there, that tree couldn't live. A tree could have a hundred million branches but it only takes a few roots down at the bottom to make sure that tree gets everything it needs. When you get some roots, hold on to them but the rest of it... just let it go. Let folks go." I like your tree analogy. I think I'm gonna go draw me a tree and put some names on those leaves. Lol.  Now I cannot look at a tree the same way because I am the kind of person who loves growth and if the tree is a metaphor of my life then this is what my poor tree looks like!  Why can't I see my tree looking like a happy tree?  NOW THAT'S A BIG HAPPY TREE! LOOK AT ALL THOSE LEAVES! No wonder I can't get a date! My tree is all prickly! I want a new LIFE TREE!  I guess if there is one consolation I don't have to deal with this every year... 
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Edited by
Rdglo17
on
Sat 09/22/12 10:16 PM
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Why can't I see my tree looking like a happy tree? NOW THAT'S A BIG HAPPY TREE! LOOK AT ALL THOSE LEAVES! No wonder I can't get a date! My tree is all prickly! I want a new LIFE TREE! I guess if there is one consolation I don't have to deal with this every year... I think you need better fertilizer! |
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Why can't I see my tree looking like a happy tree? NOW THAT'S A BIG HAPPY TREE! LOOK AT ALL THOSE LEAVES! No wonder I can't get a date! My tree is all prickly! I want a new LIFE TREE! I guess if there is one consolation I don't have to deal with this every year... I think you need better fertilizer! But people will think I m full of... POO POO!
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