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Topic: Are we allowed to be sad in here?
no photo
Mon 06/11/12 06:44 PM
Edited by justmarian on Mon 06/11/12 06:46 PM
That´s something I have asked myself lately. We´re used to hiding our emotions in our everyday life (at least in my country). If you are seen crying in the street, no matter if you´re crying because you´re happy or sad, most people will look at you as if you were crazy, some of them may even give you the "what is she thinking, crying in public??!!" look.

Are we allowed, and I mean "allowed" as in: do we let ourselves to be sad?

I have been given very sound advice as regarding how to improve my profile but there are always phrases that are repeated: "keep it positive, keep it simple, keep it fun"
Are we supposed to be all OK and fine in the forum and everytime we log in so as to attract others? can´t we be sad? even a little bit?

At the risk of losing everything I have achieved here so far(after improving my profile, and all) I am ready to say that I´M NOT A ROBOT, I AM A GOOD PERSON, AND I DO HAVE EMOTIONS and TODAY I AM SAD.
YES! I HAD AN AWFUL BIRTHDAY, IT COULD BE THE SADDEST EVER!(I´m really sorry about my grammar, syntaxis or whatever... that´s why I´m here for, to improve my English... apart from making friends)

I´m going through a bad time, emotionally, economically, spiritually ..... just in my WHOLE life. And the people who were closed to me didn´t even remember my birthday - relatives and old friends (and I know that you´re brobably thinking that I must have done something REALLY bad to them, but honestly, I did not. We seem to have taken different paths)And when things couldn´t get worse, a person who used to be my best friend, who hurt me before because of things she did, appeared out of the blue, and said "happy birthday!" acting as if nothing has ever happened....

So, if what I have just posted makes me a NEGATIVE, SAD, PATHETIC PERSON then I do not care and I AM NOT SORRY for saying I AM SAD.
And if this site is really ment TO GET TO KNOW SOMEBODY, then this is me. I am an honest girl and I´m not afraid of saying that I DO have bad days... really bad and awaful ones.like today....

So, are you sad? just do not be afraid to post it and share your story with me! I DO care.

no photo
Mon 06/11/12 06:53 PM
I'm sorry that you had such a bad day. flowerforyou

Totage's photo
Mon 06/11/12 06:58 PM

That´s something I have asked myself lately. We´re used to hiding our emotions in our everyday life (at least in my country). If you are seen crying in the street, no matter if you´re crying because you´re happy or sad, most people will look at you as if you were crazy, some of them may even give you the "what is she thinking, crying in public??!!" look.

Are we allowed, and I mean "allowed" as in: do we let ourselves to be sad?

I have been given very sound advice as regarding how to improve my profile but there are always phrases that are repeated: "keep it positive, keep it simple, keep it fun"
Are we supposed to be all OK and fine in the forum and everytime we log in so as to attract others? can´t we be sad? even a little bit?

At the risk of losing everything I have achieved here so far(after improving my profile, and all) I am ready to say that I´M NOT A ROBOT, I AM A GOOD PERSON, AND I DO HAVE EMOTIONS and TODAY I AM SAD.
YES! I HAD AN AWFUL BIRTHDAY, IT COULD BE THE SADDEST EVER!(I´m really sorry about my grammar, syntaxis or whatever... that´s why I´m here for, to improve my English... apart from making friends)

I´m going through a bad time, emotionally, economically, spiritually ..... just in my WHOLE life. And the people who were closed to me didn´t even remember my birthday - relatives and old friends (and I know that you´re brobably thinking that I must have done something REALLY bad to them, but honestly, I did not. We seem to have taken different paths)And when things couldn´t get worse, a person who used to be my best friend, who hurt me before because of things she did, appeared out of the blue, and said "happy birthday!" acting as if nothing has ever happened....

So, if what I have just posted makes me a NEGATIVE, SAD, PATHETIC PERSON then I do not care and I AM NOT SORRY for saying I AM SAD.
And if this site is really ment TO GET TO KNOW SOMEBODY, then this is me. I am an honest girl and I´m not afraid of saying that I DO have bad days... really bad and awaful ones.like today....

So, are you sad? just do not be afraid to post it and share your story with me! I DO care.


@>-->----

Life is full of all sorts of emotions and experieneces, many great, and many bad. Try not to let the bad harden your heart or make you bitter. Give yourself time to heal, and when the time is right, get up, dust yourself off, and move on. Sometimes it's easy to get back up after we fall, other times we need to sit out for a while and heal.

no photo
Mon 06/11/12 07:04 PM
Thank you for your simpathy Spidercmb

And Totage, I do believe your words are wise but I didn´t mean it like that. My question was: Can we even say we are sad in this site without people thinking we are just a grumpy, biiter and sad person?

Phuque2's photo
Mon 06/11/12 07:06 PM
Edited by Phuque2 on Mon 06/11/12 07:11 PM
I am for the most part a very happy, fun and funny man. A few years ago while on this site, I posted that I was sad also. My love, lover and great friend died. I lived with her many years ago, we were soul deep in love and had been together for 2 years. On her way home to me, she hit a tree and was in a vegitative state for 30 years. It is ok to be sad, but it is our job to carry on and find that middle ground where we can still be happy yet keep that sadness where it belongs. Only I will know when it is at the surface, and I will deal with that in my way. So be sad as you need to be and live life and carry on.

yellowrose10's photo
Mon 06/11/12 07:06 PM

Thank you for your simpathy Spidercmb

And Totage, I do believe your words are wise but I didn´t mean it like that. My question was: Can we even say we are sad in this site without people thinking we are just a grumpy, biiter and sad person?


I'm sure there are some that would think this, but a lot that wouldn't

IMO emotions aren't good or bad. We feel what we feel. Sometimes it helps to talk it out...better than holding it in. flowerforyou

no photo
Mon 06/11/12 07:09 PM

Thank you for your simpathy Spidercmb

And Totage, I do believe your words are wise but I didn´t mean it like that. My question was: Can we even say we are sad in this site without people thinking we are just a grumpy, biiter and sad person?


Everyone has sad days, anyone who assumes you are grumpy or bitter because you are sad one day, is probably too small minded to worry about.

Totage's photo
Mon 06/11/12 07:10 PM

Thank you for your simpathy Spidercmb

And Totage, I do believe your words are wise but I didn´t mean it like that. My question was: Can we even say we are sad in this site without people thinking we are just a grumpy, biiter and sad person?


I often share my feelings here, and the people here are very understanding and supportive. Many here have helped me through some really tough times, it really is like a family here.

Stick around and enjoy the forums. As you get to know us, you'll meet some really amazing people, make good friends, and have fun. :)

teadipper's photo
Mon 06/11/12 07:17 PM
I personally do not trust people who blow sunshine up my azz 24/7. People who pretend to be 100% agreeable and likeable and "normal" are usually the most f***ed up. The guy I ran off to Texas with was one of those everyone thinks he is a great guy in public but at home with me, I am watching Chelsea Lately and he is screaming at me to go watch it in the other room because HE HATES "BLOODY HOMOS" and who when I brought home California Pizza Kitchen Pizza that was not beef or pork, SCREAMED at me and acted like a child. Not just saying he didn't like it but that god put pigs and cows on this earth to be eaten on his pizza. Excuse me??? Did we not go over the I am a PETA member as well as an NRA member?? Did we not go over I am from California?? Never trust anybody who comes off as too good to be true because THEY ARE. Sometimes I come off as wonderful when I am doing the worst. Like a lot of comedy, etc. comes from pain. A lot of us who appear AT TIMES to be charming are suffering the most. Being funny, etc. is just an outlet. Think of how many great comedians, musicians, writers, etc. off themselves and no one had any idea they suffered. I would rather you out and out tell me you are suffering so I can be there for you if you need me. Just my ten cents. I cannot write you BTW because of your age limit set so I tried to reach out to you but couldn't.

TL

no photo
Mon 06/11/12 07:17 PM
Sadness is just another emotion pretty lady. If you are having a bad time of it, by all means post and discuss. You might not like all the responses, but most people are kind and understanding.

I think that if the sadness persists,and you cannot bring yourself out of it, then that needs to be dealt with differently, that might lean towards a depression.

Two of my 13 year old dogs are very sick and I will have to make a decision for them when their quality of life is determined by me and the vet to be not fair to the animal anymore, THAT will be a sad day for me indeed, and I hope you are there to give me encouragement as I would do for you.

Chin up and smile. That's what friends are for.

Queene123's photo
Mon 06/11/12 07:21 PM
yes you can express yourself when feeling sad

even writing poetry helps

teadipper's photo
Mon 06/11/12 07:28 PM

Sadness is just another emotion pretty lady. If you are having a bad time of it, by all means post and discuss. You might not like all the responses, but most people are kind and understanding.

I think that if the sadness persists,and you cannot bring yourself out of it, then that needs to be dealt with differently, that might lean towards a depression.

Two of my 13 year old dogs are very sick and I will have to make a decision for them when their quality of life is determined by me and the vet to be not fair to the animal anymore, THAT will be a sad day for me indeed, and I hope you are there to give me encouragement as I would do for you.

Chin up and smile. That's what friends are for.


As a huge animal lover and having had more animal companions than most, I understand this. I had I lost two beloved dogs and a cat within 6 months. All quality of life decisions. What got me through it is that god gave us dominion over the animals. Some people think that just means we can eat them. No we are responsible for them. We are fortunate that we can show they mercy that we are not allowed to show humans.

Speaking of depression, not kidding, I had a dog that had to take Prozac years ago.

In the words of Meredith Brookes:

Some days goes your way
You're on a roll you can't explain
And then it all goes down the drain
Your cat's hit by a car
The ATM eats your card
You're wondering what changed from yesterday
Save me from, from going mental
Save me from just spinning out

Some days are better than lovers
Some days you just can't figure out
Some days you can't explain

My best friend and me one night
Were drinkin' at Pete's on Crescent Height
Just like that we end up in a fight
Like a yo-yo up and down
You're headin' north, you end up south

Save me from, from going mental
Save me from just spinning out

Some days are better than lovers
Some days you just can't figure out
Some days are better than others
You can't explain some days away
Someday

Save me from, from going mental
Save me from spinning out

Some days are better
Some days are never
Some days, whatever

Some days are better than lovers
Some days you just can't figure out
Some days are better than others
Some days you just can't get out
Someday...

Ladywind7's photo
Mon 06/11/12 07:29 PM
Some days we just need to vent. Their is no shame in that. The Mingle famdamily do it regularily. Hugs and Happy Birthday to you. With cake and candles.flowers

willing2's photo
Mon 06/11/12 07:31 PM
Edited by willing2 on Mon 06/11/12 07:32 PM

yes you can express yourself when feeling sad

even writing poetry helps

Like;
Little Miss Muffet sat on her tuffit eating her curds and whey.
Along came a spider who sat down beside her and asked;"What you got in the bowl, biotch?":angel:

Sad has it's time and place.
I care not much what people think of me. If I need to be sad, I just do it.

no photo
Mon 06/11/12 07:31 PM
Thank you all for your replies. i´m glad i posted this before going to bed... now I feel a little bit better, thanks to your encouraging comments

Teadipper, i´ll se if I can get rid of that age limit I have set before... and I totally agree with what you say. Pesonally I do not trust those who look or try to appear happy 24/7 because I think they are shallow people, and I do not get along with shallow people at all..

Thank you all, you have been very helpful. This is a good way to finish my day and my birthday, thank you very much!
:-)

no photo
Mon 06/11/12 07:33 PM
Oh yeah, happy birthday! flowerforyou

willing2's photo
Mon 06/11/12 07:34 PM
Edited by willing2 on Mon 06/11/12 07:38 PM

Thank you all for your replies. i´m glad i posted this before going to bed... now I feel a little bit better, thanks to your encouraging comments

Teadipper, i´ll se if I can get rid of that age limit I have set before... and I totally agree with what you say. Pesonally I do not trust those who look or try to appear happy 24/7 because I think they are shallow people, and I do not get along with shallow people at all..

Thank you all, you have been very helpful. This is a good way to finish my day and my birthday, thank you very much!
:-)


Well, Happy Birthday, young Darlin'!


Totage's photo
Mon 06/11/12 07:35 PM
Sorry you didn't have such a good birthday, but I'm glad you're feeling better. It's normal to have ups and downs. All we can do is try to have more ups than downs I suppose. I hope you have a better day tomorrow. :)

no photo
Mon 06/11/12 07:38 PM
GOODNIGHT


no photo
Mon 06/11/12 07:44 PM
Thank you all for those lovely "smileys", they ´re so cute!, ... Teadipper you can reach me any time, I got rid of the age limit

Goodnight, see you soon and have a nice day (tomorrow, today...wherever you are....)

:-)

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