I am going to find a church and I am also going to start attending martial arts again. I have met good quality people this way.

My problem is I get afraid of really decent good men with really really honorable intentions. Like guys from church looking for a wife. I want to go running screaming into traffic. It's not that they aren't wonderful. Just after being married to a religious Jew for almost 16 years and with him 20, it scares me.

It's almost like I shoot down decent guys because I am so afraid of remarrying even though that would probably make me happy.

Anyone else like this?

the afraid of remarrying part,,,definitely

the 'shooting down' nice guys because of it,,,,not really

I pretty much run from ANY guys that seem to want to be 'involved' more than they want to make friends,,,


if it EVER happens for me again, it will have to grow from an INCREDIBLE friendship

not lust, or attraction, or 'dating', or wanting to belong to someone or keep someone from being swooped up by someone else,,,etc,,,

Oh what church are you gonna go to?? I always wanted to learn more about Judaism.

I don't want to ever get married again bu it hasn't been a problem for me. I haven't really talked to any men over the last few years that were set on marriage anyway. Most guys my age are fine with not getting married.

It's a huge process to become Jewish including 2 years of study. It's not what I want to do again. I fought so hard to leave my ex behind and to take his religion with is too much.

I went to one of those martial arts churches before down here in Kentucky. Them brothers are crazy......

Yes. I'm expert at this. I've somehow developed the lose them before they lose me mentality. The sad thing is, I don't even realize what I'm doing till it's pretty much done. And then it's too late.

Mine's commitment in general, not just marriage. Maybe in a year when my life has settled down some, I can work on not putting my sneakers on and running away like crazy when I see a guy getting too interested.

HOWEVER...maybe it's just gonna take that one special guy to work his way into my heart and make me realize that I want to retire my sneakers for good. Ya never know.

well if you ladies ever need a jogging partner look no further lol

Alright then, Mister...let's hit the trail!

Well I know the 3 Catholic churches up here well. I actually attend a tiny little Traditional Catholic church down in Santa Clarita. But you have to wear a dress and a veil to go there.

I know a few of the non-denominational Christian churches. Be careful of the Lancaster Baptist church. But you didn't hear that from me.

There's some Wiccan groups if you're interested. I know the people but don't go to their stuff anymore.

Can't we use a treadmill? it not that I need a machines help,
it just makes it more fun.

Sure! Can we put a couple of treadmills together and choreograph a treadmill routine like in that Ok Go video? Cuz that'd be pretty fun, I think.

What do you feel is the cause of this? Sounds like you're struggling with something.

Me, I can't wait to marry my love, attend church, have children of our own, raise a family, etc. Before I met her, I would do things to better MY life, now I do it for OUR life, I catch myself smiling to myself a lot when I day dream about US. Yes, I am in love, but that's really all I've ever wanted.

I do hope that you find the man you're looking for, and that you fall in love again.

Sounds like you know what the problem is

ain't no one else can handle it for you.

What's the problem?

Ps..I spit lemonade and whisky on my pc screen when I hit the line of...

"I am going to find a church".......

I am sure that will work out great if you need a man to dictate things to you or ya just feel like giving up.

Dude.............Hell no.

I do got to say that I respect that Totage...it ain't for me personally but I do respect your position.

You took your ex's religion?...did I read that right? Are you now jewish or not.

I come from the blood of Polish Jews..I will ask.

I had no idea applications were available. It is crap to get to study for it.....My blood line was killed my family for being Jewish....That is why we are now Baptist or aethiest.

How "huge" was your process to become a jew?

I got $20 that says you may be smart enough to not answer....but, I got no problem with throwing $20 your way.

Seems to me; you should just avoid the church thing and stick to the martial arts. I am sure there are other groups you could join other than church.

TY, Krupa, I really do appreciate that. We all have our own hopes and dreams and what makes us happy.

This pretty much describes me as well.

Only sometimes I recognise that I'm pushing them away and sometimes I don't.

It will definitely take someone with a lot of patience and a thickish skin to work his way past all my b*llcrap

Yep, me too but I do realize I am doing it as a way to protect myself. I thought the best thing to do for me is to stop dating. Its not fair to the guy I am dating if I am intentionally pushing him away.