Oh , figured I should add this to the diary , it might come in handy....




MENTAL HOSPITAL PHONE MENU

Hello and thank you for calling The State Mental Hospital

Please select from the following options menu:

If you are obsessive-compulsive,
press 1 repeatedly.

If you are codependent,
please ask someone to press 2 for you.

If you have multiple personalities,
press 3, 4, 5 and 6.

If you are paranoid, we know who you are and what you want.
Stay on the line so we can trace your call.

If you are delusional,
press 7 and your call will be forwarded to the Mother Ship.

If you are schizophrenic,
listen carefully and a little voice will
tell you which number to press.

If you are manic-depressive,
it doesn't matter which number you press,
nothing will make you happy anyway.

If you are dyslexic,
press 9696969696969696.

If you are bipolar,
please leave a message
after the beep
or before the beep
or after the beep.
Please wait for the beep.

If you have short-term memory loss,
press 9.
If you have short-term memory loss,
press 9.
If you have short-term memory loss,
press 9.

If you have low self-esteem,
please hang up.
Our operators are too busy
to talk with you.

If you are menopausal,
put the gun down,
hang up,
turn on the fan,
lie down and cry.
! You won 't be crazy forever.

If you are blonde,
don't press any buttons,
you'll just mess it up.

hey cat

hey...

you doing better darlin?

ya , kinda ...

im here if you need me

thanks ...

Dear diary.....I am back......work was kaos.....naked people running around in wheelchairs....of course they were my patients but ppl wanting wanting alwaysssssssssss wanting bla bla bla......one of my fave patients told me to have a drink when I got him......I think I will take his advice!!!

Dear Diary,

62 for a high temp tomorrow! I might freeze my fantas off!!

WOO HOO!!! Naked wheel chair racing!

wow.......fanta arent you supposed to be in your jammies???

hi gypsy.....

yaaaaaaaaaaaaaa naked psycho wheel chair racing.....if I ever get old.......don't ever let me be needy..........ever.......making up stories because you are bored........

oh , sorry that was rude ..
hi fanta ...
hi kid...

hey purple......you look ummmmmmmmm different!!!

Soon, I napped longer than I should have. Now Im wide as wide awake as getting a dangleing body part stuck in the spokes of a wheelchair might make one of your patients!

kinda purple ......

Hi Fanta, Purple, Gypsy, Thumper

Hey purplesexykitty!!