Well, I'm sure this has been discussed but is there really a game men and women play with each other in order to prolong a relationship?

Specifically I want to know why men have to CHASE a woman in order for him be at all interested? Why does it have to be so one-sided? Its very confusing to me because I am a woman who shows it when I like someone or tell them in any way I can. But I guess that can scare most men away purely because A: they're not mature enough and B: they don't believe in love until someone naturally amazing comes along and LEAVES their a$$ one day.

I wish men wouldn't play these games and I hope there aren't a lot of good, true men who think and believe this to be their lives. If true, then its setting yourself as this big heart breaker and that's not an attractive quality.

I dont CHASE.

Although it nice to know that there are women like you out there that will show interest. It makes it so much easier when its played that way. I cant stand damn cat and mouse games.

Good to know some people don't. Can't stand it. It really gets irritating when you're trying to get to know someone and even if you show a little bit of interest they get scared and run

I mean, I don't bother a man. But I'm starting to think that you gotta think like them in order to get their attention. Eff that!

Well, I'm a guy who basically needs to see some indicators if/when someone is interested, because I have absolutely NO clue if/when someone is interested unless they make it really really obvious. People used to ask me "Didn't you see that girl flirting with you?" and I never had any idea what they were talking about. I still don't, to be honest.

I don't chase people. I don't know how, and I wouldn't be any good at it.

Ugh!! Don't think like them. If they get scared and run, then it isn't worth your time.

Bother as in...??

I agree with Lex. I need a poke here and there. A message. Some type of indication.

Scared and run=unresponsive.

Bother as in just bug them. Call them, text them, basically ask a lot of invasive questions. Guys always say they don't wanna hear about an ex bf. But then men turn around they do the same. So its OK for them to do it? That I don't get.

I once had this guy on a first date say some girls like to be treated badly. TMI if you ask me. OK, he was talking about his ex there and I rolled my eyes but the fact that he said that is putting judgment on ALL women. Anyway, getting off track here. Men constantly play this "its hot if she doesn't want it" game. But when a guy does that to the girl its overlooked? What gives? Most of the time women truly don't want it and the guy doesn't give up but I'm mostly talking about how men basically want a woman to just sit there and be a stepford wife, let them do ALL the perusing.

I don't get why men think this is appropriate behavior.

I don’t think this is gender exclusive. There is a portion of men and women both that seem to be most attracted to things (people) they cannot have, for whatever reason. Sometimes the sexes are equally excited by the “chase”.

Its gender exclusive because I'm not gay. Since I don't date woman I can't side with you in saying that's how it is for them. I only state what I see and what I could do without. And playing women on a string is the most arrogant thing someone can do. Its basically like playing with someone's emotions, and it really makes them look like a dictator in the long run of things.

Ok, I’ll give you that based on your experience, but I do know men that act this way and I also have seen women do it as well. Of course it’s not fair to the others involved no matter how one views it. Personally, it doesn’t bother me in the least when a woman takes the initiative.

You'd think in some cases a man would get turned on by that notion. Frankly I think a lot of women know this and play along with them until one eventually gets hurt. That's always how it ends when one side has complete control over the other and there's this malleable feeling in the air. It should be equal. Whatever happened to vocalizing in relationships? If its not natural then that's where it becomes work. And I am not a fan of working something out when its so solitary.

I guess I don't understand that... I have been on both sides of that deal. I have been "chased" and have done the "chasing". The signs are obvious if you are having interaction with a person whether or not they are interested in you. Sometimes more interaction needs to take place in order to have that established.

WOW!!!! ^^ This sounds so much like me. It seems that i never have a clue that a woman is flirting with me, or giving me a sign that she is interested in me. Not atleast untill later on in the day when I think back on it. And then its one of those " OMG, what dummy I am " moments. Yes. I am the type that a women has to pretty much tell me that she is trying to get my attention.

In order to feel like a man, I need to chase a woman who is full of preconceived notions, can generalize in completely whacky directions, and make value judgements over others based solely on her own individual delusions and misguided insights.

Yeah, man... that's what makes life such a beautiful place and wanting to mate with a member of the opposite sex. A proper, card-carrying member, of course, with her membership dues paid up in full and up-to-date.

EDIT: I was being negative. I scratched my post therefore. It was even worse than the one previous. My apologies.

Some people play the game.

And some have the game played on them.

That's life.

You win a few.

You lose a few.

I honestly think this topic should be made into a book. And if the rights get sold to a studio, it should star Tom Hanks and Meg Ryan. But we're talking old school Hollywood, Jimmy Stewart and Maureen O'Hara.

"In order to feel like a man"? Is this the kind of garble guys think makes them a man? I don't really like playing and guessing what he's thinking. I like getting to know someone and have things just be plain and in view. Why does it have to be so contrived in that sense?

Unfortunately, yes. This is why there are 14,923,662 profile pics of a guy holding up a fish.

*snicker*



hiya(((((((sexyLexy)))))))

And Hi right back atcha!

You will note that in none of my pictures am I holding up a fish.

I do have one somewhere in which I'm holding up a little rubber stegosaurus, but that was intended to be satirical. And I didn't spend $7000 on a boat and poles and worms and sonar devices to catch the little rubber stegosaurus. I spent about two bucks at the dollar store.