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| Topic: men, do you have enough freedom?...lol | |
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I hear from my married male friends and guys that are in relationships that they have no freedom and need to be accountable to their significant others every minute of the day. So, yes I can see where guys are not getting enough freedom. Guess that is where the term "ball and chain" came from. I'm FREE  And that is exactly my point. I don't want a man to lose his identity or individuality just because we are a couple. I was never a believer that as a couple you have to do everything together as we both still have our own lives outside of the relationship and its meant to be enjoyed. Having said that...I wouldn't mind being tied... up now and again
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I hear from my married male friends and guys that are in relationships that they have no freedom and need to be accountable to their significant others every minute of the day. So, yes I can see where guys are not getting enough freedom. Guess that is where the term "ball and chain" came from. I'm FREE And that is exactly my point. I don't want a man to lose his identity or individuality just because we are a couple. I was never a believer that as a couple you have to do everything together as we both still have our own lives outside of the relationship and its meant to be enjoyed. Having said that...I wouldn't mind being tied... up now and again Well, I do have lots of rope in the house. 
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Well, I do have lots of rope in the house. You just wear that outfit and we can put the rope to other uses 
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IMO, I think it’s unhealthy to suffocate your guy. If your insecurities are such that you can’t trust your man to be faithful when out of your sight or you feel that you need to curb him too much, then you’re probably in the wrong relationship. However if your guy is spending too much time with his friends and not enough time with you and he fails to acknowledge your feelings, then it’s time to look for someone else. As a person, I am looking for a monogamous relationship but I’m also a firm believer in both parties having different interests and social groups. I wouldn’t want to be with someone who’s wrapped around me 24/7 even if we were cohabiting. This. Exactly this. Because I know from personal experience that their is a very fine line between not suffocating someone and being taken advantage of. lol Oh Shannon!!!!! Beat me , Spank me, Make me wright bad checks!!!!! Hahaha...only if you're good.
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so, its all personal, like most things...lol
I say, a guy can be as free as when we courted, free to wash their own clothes, fix their own meals, get loving WHEN they take me out,, JUST LIKE WHEN WE COURTED but most guys I hear complain about their freedom are all for the little 'sacrifices' the woman is supposed to make for them, but dont want to change anything about their responsibilities or lives for the woman in other words, the old uneven double standard,,which Im not for I want to move forward with someone, not stand still, if they want to stay how they are and keep 'their' life, they can do it without adding more responsibility to mine by way of sharing a home or a relationship,,,, |
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Edited by
sweetestgirl11
on
Tue 12/06/11 06:36 PM
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so, its all personal, like most things...lol I say, a guy can be as free as when we courted, free to wash their own clothes, fix their own meals, get loving WHEN they take me out,, JUST LIKE WHEN WE COURTED but most guys I hear complain about their freedom are all for the little 'sacrifices' the woman is supposed to make for them, but dont want to change anything about their responsibilities or lives for the woman in other words, the old uneven double standard,,which Im not for I want to move forward with someone, not stand still, if they want to stay how they are and keep 'their' life, they can do it without adding more responsibility to mine by way of sharing a home or a relationship,,,, there are some good points here. if the status quo of pre relationship dating is to be maintained then I would never have to cook another meal or pick up another pair of dirty socks that belong to someone else...YAY Actually as far a freedom and couple time - if a man is not wanting to spend a significant amount of couple time with his partner then he is with the wrong partner. It is a compatibility question I also like what you said about change - moving forward- & not standing still - this has to be desired by both partners - I would not want a man to spend time with me who would rather be elsewhere - no thanks  but if he isn't enthusiastic about spending time with me, first as a friend and then as a partner, things would not work |
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My guy can have all the freedom he wants! Oh wait....I dont have a guy.  
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IMO, I think it’s unhealthy to suffocate your guy. If your insecurities are such that you can’t trust your man to be faithful when out of your sight or you feel that you need to curb him too much, then you’re probably in the wrong relationship. However if your guy is spending too much time with his friends and not enough time with you and he fails to acknowledge your feelings, then it’s time to look for someone else. As a person, I am looking for a monogamous relationship but I’m also a firm believer in both parties having different interests and social groups. I wouldn’t want to be with someone who’s wrapped around me 24/7 even if we were cohabiting. 
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yes, I have all the freedom I want
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My guy can have all the freedom he wants! Oh wait....I dont have a guy.   
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so, its all personal, like most things...lol I say, a guy can be as free as when we courted, free to wash their own clothes, fix their own meals, get loving WHEN they take me out,, JUST LIKE WHEN WE COURTED but most guys I hear complain about their freedom are all for the little 'sacrifices' the woman is supposed to make for them, but dont want to change anything about their responsibilities or lives for the woman in other words, the old uneven double standard,,which Im not for I want to move forward with someone, not stand still, if they want to stay how they are and keep 'their' life, they can do it without adding more responsibility to mine by way of sharing a home or a relationship,,,, LOL Agreed. I can see both sides. Like: > The woman not letting her man do the things he did before their commitment. For example, hanging out with friends all the time = A lot of drunk guys all together are bound to do stupid things like: A) Encourage Cheating B) Encourage things that lead to physical harm C) Encourage breaking of the law D) Cause the feeling of neglect to the GF She may feel she needs to "limit his freedom" because she's afraid of what may happen, in other words she's insecure. OR Maybe he needs a mommy to tell him what to do because if he doesn't have one, he'll always be getting in trouble. So even though he's constantly running his mouth about her limiting him, inside, he actually likes it. But in the case of the latter, then there isn't any trust in the relationship, which is what should be addressed, rather than "Oh my GF took away my freedom!". This applies to men too! Don't limit her freedom! I hate it when a GF "can't" go out because her man didn't "let" her.  |
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she might not be insecure at all - those are very realistic concerns
maybe she just has common sense and is ready to grow up but her guy is not....... I would question why a guy in a committed relationship would be doing those things all the time anyway A guy like u described I would not commit to in the first place so I really think it makes more sense to make wise choices in a partner where ur values are compatible |
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Edited by
navygirl
on
Tue 12/06/11 09:23 PM
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The way I figure it; I would give a man as much freedom as I would like to have. I would ask him if he wanted to join me when I went out but also give him the option to say No and not nag him for it. I don't believe in making someone do something they detest by guilting them with the "if you loved me" phrase. I hear what guys say about their girlfriends/wives when they have to do this stuff and they are not happy about it but as they say it shuts her up, it prevents a fight, or it stops her from nagging me. Doesn't sound like love to me but what do I know. Makes me wonder why anyone would stay in a relationship like that.
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im single so of course i have freedom
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so, its all personal, like most things...lol I say, a guy can be as free as when we courted, free to wash their own clothes, fix their own meals, get loving WHEN they take me out,, JUST LIKE WHEN WE COURTED but most guys I hear complain about their freedom are all for the little 'sacrifices' the woman is supposed to make for them, but dont want to change anything about their responsibilities or lives for the woman in other words, the old uneven double standard,,which Im not for I want to move forward with someone, not stand still, if they want to stay how they are and keep 'their' life, they can do it without adding more responsibility to mine by way of sharing a home or a relationship,,,, LOL Agreed. I can see both sides. Like: > The woman not letting her man do the things he did before their commitment. For example, hanging out with friends all the time = A lot of drunk guys all together are bound to do stupid things like: A) Encourage Cheating B) Encourage things that lead to physical harm C) Encourage breaking of the law D) Cause the feeling of neglect to the GF She may feel she needs to "limit his freedom" because she's afraid of what may happen, in other words she's insecure. OR Maybe he needs a mommy to tell him what to do because if he doesn't have one, he'll always be getting in trouble. So even though he's constantly running his mouth about her limiting him, inside, he actually likes it. But in the case of the latter, then there isn't any trust in the relationship, which is what should be addressed, rather than "Oh my GF took away my freedom!". This applies to men too! Don't limit her freedom! I hate it when a GF "can't" go out because her man didn't "let" her. Wow; I don't know any guys that want a woman to limit their freedom and the guys that cheat will cheat whether you give him freedom or not. I always give a guy as much freedom as he wants and ironically the more freedom I gave a guy; the more time he would rather spend with me. Funny how that works. |
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they all have too much freedom! TIE THEM DOWN I SAY!!
no TV till u take out the trash no sex if u watch football anybody wanna get married???  
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they all have too much freedom! TIE THEM DOWN I SAY!! no TV till u take out the trash no sex if u watch football anybody wanna get married???
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