So i am a usually a long term relationship fellow. I feel i get more then a one nighter. But my luck has had me fall deep, true and blindly with someone not ****ing worth it. Now it takes time to even open up. Feel like i have lost my dedication to open and care cause of a couple backstabbing broads. Should i just deal or keep this Wall of Jericho up?

I am sympathetic to your dilemma… when I turned 40 a few years ago, I was a devout supporter of long term, meaningful relationships. I only dated men that I felt I could have a future with. They had to be like minded, career orientated and want the same/similar things that I did etc etc. Then when I turned 40, I had a total about-face…a mid life crisis if you like.

My two children were all the kids that I wanted/was ever going to have…I was never going to get married as the thought of being a first time bride in my 40's repulsed me. I was also going to relax some of the restrictions that I had placed on myself in my 30’s….So I dated guys I wouldn’t have given the time of day to before and released that I wasn’t going to go up in flames. I did a few other (totally legal) things that I hadn’t had the courage to do and also didn't go up in flames and found out that it was ok to have a different type of fun…but ultimately I found out that this leopard doesn’t change it’s spots…there are some things that are intrinsically part of my character/nature and although it was fun to walk on the ‘wild side’ for a bit. I am who I am..

Walls are good to have at times that is until one has time to heal the heart & soul....Then one needs to learn to take down those walls...

If one is not willing to give all to the one they are with how do they expect them to give their all..

Regardless what has happen within your past, the past is the past the new one your with is not your past nor should be treated as your past. They very well could be your future but unless your willing to give them 100% of yourself you will never know...

Kind of like having a Hot Fudge Sundae with no Hot Fudge it will be lacking the main ingredient.

I feel that being cautious is smart, however, if you label every woman for your past...you will fall short of all the possibilities. The little voice in your head is usually right. Good luck.

The right person can chop down even the thickest of walls.
They just need the right axe to get the job done.
Don't give up, you never know.

Once you realize that not all women are like the couple you've had issues with, you'll be able to deal with it and move on.