My turn!

Ok, lets start with the personal grooming. She sends over a complete never used spa with 3 attendents to clean and pamper me. Once I smell and feel like I'm floating on air she has the chauffeur pick me up (and I mean literally pick me up) and put me in the stretch. After a freshly squeezed juice we arrive at the airport where I get on the private jet. I meet her on board and she is looking "tens". As we take off we head east 40 miles and raise to a reasonable altitude so we may see the lay of the land. She then points out a huge line that was drawn on the ground from Mexico 400 miles north. The line is just east of las Vegas. As we snuggle she tells me that she purchased from this line over to the Pacific and is giving it to me. We celebrate with a great red wine and 5 choices of prime cut steak (lobster on the side).

As we land in San Clemente Cali we are greeted by Barack and Michelle and escorted to our new ocean side pad. We have a brief meeting with Krupa and manO to discuss the evening party festivities and make our way down to the guests. Tony sings a few numbers while we snuggle yet more on the beach. After getting cleaned up by the attendants we make the announcement to our mingle friends of their new homes and cars. Oprah helps hand out the keys as Ellen has a few inspiring words. Leaving the party in capable hands we make our way to the master suite.

The next morning I wake up beside pepper licking me in my face and wagging her tail. I take a deep breath and smile. Right at the time I start to think this was only a dream I roll over to find a chocolate and note which says "daddy wants to know if we would like to own France or Italy". I pull my silk sheets back over me and sleep in.

I show up. She pay me $7 (in food stamps) to use me for her personal gratification then gives me 10 minutes to get wiped off then kicks me out of the door before her grandma wakes up.

I am Rico Suave'.

Pepper can write??!?