Idk, but just thought he was maybe a bit desperate. I was questioning why someone would want a persons number that soon.

have to say ive had women do the same thing to me on the first chat online kinda loose interest quick then for me.

I have had to deal with that...

I am pretty blunt.

"Look, you're cool but, I don't know you well enough to give that up just yet. I'd be glad to get to know you here first"

You are an adult. You don't owe the guy anything. If he can't deal with it....then too damned bad.

People have different preferences. If someone is local, I prefer to meet sooner rather than later. When that happens, numbers are exchanged fairly quickly.

most guys get sick of writing "letters" kind of quick, especially if it appears that there's a spark (indicated by your consistent responses). Now, you don't have a cell. So yea, your getting a little paro. But you can just tell him at least and say "look, we can chat online if you'd like". But then again, I'm the kind thats grateful to talk to a girl rather than get ignored on this type of site. Just me.

i would just like to say that the guy i added my yahoo list that i was question was already asking me sexual questions so i blocked him!

If they push push back ..

well he said what i figured he was gonna say bc he was pushing hard to meet me and then came a sexual question.im glad he doesnt have my number lol

i think 4 or 5 messages is a legit number before asking for a number.

that being said, if you don't feel secure yet don't give it to him. if he keeps pushing for it be done with him.

in his defense, i wouldn't want to continue writing back and forth with someone like we were pen pals or something. unless it's just friends. there's a lot that goes on audibly that can't be discerned in text. also, the communication is more personal when it's spoken.


but first and foremost you should do whatever you're comfortable with.


. . .

Maybe, if the 4 or 5 messages actually said something interesting that allowed each person to get to know the other a bit. But from my experience, the first few messages say very little. And a response does not indicate interest. So, it usually works better to chat a bit online to see how things to, then move to the phone if there is mutual interest.

If he/she is worth the time and effort they will wait until you are comfortable with it. If not... they are not really concerned about how they are making you feel. Worst that can happen is they won't talk to you, and in that case...sounds like they did you a favor. Good luck.

Looks like you made a good call, haha.

Personally I think 4 or 5 messages is enough interaction to ask for a phone number, depending on how detailed the conversations were and how interested both parties appear to be. Then again, I'm the kind of person who would rather meet sooner than later because I'm more likely to know if I am or am not interested by judging how things go in person.

In the past, when I've given people my number before I really wanted to, I ended up with people who sent constant and annoying texts or called repetitively. So just go with your gut! Instant Messengers are always a good middle ground.

Unfortunately, many people don't get into much detail or conversation in the first few emails. I've received many emails like klc has listed above. That's certainly not enough for me to want to give someone my number.

Considering how much information a person you don't know can find out about you with a phone number;especially a land line, for a couple bucks I have gotten a lot more careful who I give a number to.

I think it always pays to listen to your instincts. If someone is coming on strong and is pushy or suggestive in a way that makes me feel uncomfortable I just but them on ignore. Like someone else said; every time I haven't I have ended up regretting it; drunk heavy breathers are a real pain in the neck after a hard day.