Been dating (online)the guy that I met from here for more than 4 years now. I just got denied with a US tourist visa, and he isn't sure yet when will he come to visit me (in the Phils.)- is he coming?

I'm just so confused now

I understand how you feel. I dated a wonderful guy from Australia for awhile but eventually we decided to just be friends because of financial situations we were never able to actually meet. Could you possabily appeal the visa denial? Best of Luck. :)

Wow so sorry to hear about that. If it is really meant to be then
somehow things will eventually work out.

Bummer, why did they deny the visitors visa, see if you can have it changed..

Good

I am confused too.
Your profile says you are from Florida.
Where is he from?

hope it works out for you... I admire youre willingness to take risks... i couldn't date someone out side of the country... Its bad enough having a crush on someone out of state

it sounds like he is OK with you spending a fortune on visas & travel, but he is not willing to do the same? don;t waste ur money

I'm actually from the Philippines, I put FL in my location since I thought I would be with him soon. Hope that explains

I am planning to re-apply next year. The US Embassy in my country is very strict when it comes to tourists, and I think they hate single people to go and visit the USA since they presumed that everyone has immigrant intent. Yet, I have the potential to a second refusal

Because he always reasons out that he is poor?

to expect you to carry that load financially is ungentleman-like - especially when it is his responsibility to meet what he is responsible for in a relationship. He needs to man up and do the right thing - sounds like you are getting scammed

I understand his financial situation, he wanted to come too but he lacks resources yet. But for 4 years I've been expecting some progress and I guess I'm ending up frustrated so I tried my luck on that visa thing, and yeah in my own expense - am I being stupid?

no, you are not being stupid. four years is plenty of time for a man to save enough money for a trip. you just need to do a little more investigating as to why this dude is still sitting with his thumb up his butt. a man lucky enough to meet a woman as wonderful as you should have a strong desire to do whatever it takes to be with you

Yea he isn't interested it he hasn't met you in 4 years. My gf is from Korea and hopefully she wont have any visa problems.

Ahh, all explained.
I think at this point I would wait for
him to come visit me, as it now seems
the easier course.

wow i gotta say this sounds like a pretty devoted guy

thank you for the kind friend request! no, I do not think you are being stupid, but I would advise caution. If he is not willing to visit you he may be the kind of person who does not accept responsibility for his actions, expenses etc

at the same time, the economy in the US hasn't been the greatest and a lot of folks are struggling so his lack of ability to save may not be that unrealistic

you could also get over here and meet someone else who is wonderful - so get your visa and come to the US!! but I would not pin too much hopes on this man

also true

could be he is married

the usual reason for online disappearance acts....

Thanks, guys for all the consoling words. I know I still have time to think and a lot of time to enjoy my single-blessedness. For now I am over that visa denial phase and looking forward to my upcoming trips - I am set to go to South Korea by next year