I think the hardest requirement for Parents is finding the 'balance' that works with their children

It is not easy to find just the right balance of love, discipline, encouragement, and expectation/responsibility

and to reinforce them all on a daily basis

I am so impressed with parents whose children seem to be happy AND respectful towards others (especially their parents and elders)

Mine are happy kids, but ID have to admit, they sometimes do 'get away' with much more than we ever did(And we were happy children too)

sometimes kids can be TOO questioning when it comes to instructions and rules, too argumentative, .. I always wished I had that 'look' my mom was able to master that always kept us reminded that we were the 'children' and not the 'adult',, and the respect the adult was due,,,


Every parent is different, and child rearing is a constant learning and growing experience,,,

what do you think is the hardest job of a parent?

to have to bury a child (everything else is biscuits and gravy)

Finding enough time to be with them as a single parent, and watching your little ones grow up on you.

My first son was murdered at 7.5 years, a great kid.

im sorry for your loss

i almost lost my son about 4yrs ago
he was sick a week and a few days after xmas
my mom took him to the doc and they had him admited to the hospitol with pneumonia
they rushed him into icu where he went into cardiac arrest
they had 3 doc that had to revive him
not only did he have pneumonia but issue with his heart, lungs and only kidney... so hes also on dialyis now

i have a aunt she had a baby boy that died a few days after my grandfather had died.. i was 2yrs old when grandpa died
there funeral was on the same day
my aunt didnt know how to deal with it
and she admited herself in the state hospitol for 6months

Thanks but I don't think about it much anymore, only his birthday.

Definetly the hardest thing I have done as a parent. My middle son died just before his 5th birthday.

Sorry to hear other people who lost one too.

Sory to hear about your losses. It's got t be the hardest part but next to that I agree with those who say balance. Once we have a kid life changes and we have to divide ourselves and our time with our youngsters. It's interesting to hear how others do this we can learn from others too.

Well I wouldn't be much help because when My ex became that way I devvoted myself to my youngsters. Always made sure they came first. It was worth it, both seem happy and well adjusted without their mommy around. Except for they won't hardly talk to her (not my doing) because she never came around to see them.

I'm not sure it's the hardest but parenting children differently is a struggle for me. My two girls are very different and need, want, respond differntly to most situations. I've had to adjust my parenting depending on the child. Once I learned to do that, things got easier.

Another one is letting go. As they grow and become more independent, I'm finding it very difficult to let them have more independence. Although I know they are good, responsible kids. I'm afraid of the rest of the world. I'm learning though and remind them I am growing up with them.

I guess for me its balancing being Mum and being their friend,

I have often been told that I shouldnt be both, but have no idea how you cannot be both,

My children are my best friends,

I think people can balance being parents (guides/teachers) to their children and being FRIENDLY(loving, supporting, encouraging) with their kids.


I think the notion of being 'friends' puts kids on the same level as the adult parent and thats what many people feel is cause for a red flag. I think children NEED someone they can trust has MORE experience than them, someone they can feel can PROTECT them , because they are bigger and have lived longer and know more. I Think it could be defeatist for children to have an environment where children dont feel this type of protector/authority relationship from their parent.


But its semantics, depending upon what people mean when they say they are their childrens 'friend'. Being a PARENT comes first, but there are certainly many times when all they need the parent to do is listen as a friend would.


IMHO

Hmmmm yep i may not be that at all,

i am always here for them but rarely tell them what to do, from the time they where small unless it meant that they could be killed I normally gave them choices and they could choose their own way, of course there are consequences if you make the wrong decision..

They always ask for advice if they need it, they always ask before doing something, however there are very few times that i would say no..

My children go to a christian school and have a counciler talk to them, at times, he has called me in to tell me I need to be more respponsible and act like a grown up..

well I have no idea why he thinks Im not grown up, yep i love to have fun and laugh and joke with my children, and yes I do most things with them and believe that they are my equals. I rarely let life get me down or take anything seriously
However, they do respect me and would protect me with their lives, the same as I would them, this may not be what a Mum is, but my children dont hide things from me, we talk about anything,

While other parents have children hide things from Mum and dad cause they wont like it, mine come and talk to me as they know that I will help them fix things or deal with them without getting upset..

AMEN