Hi there,

This may already have been a thread, but I did a quick scan for something dealing with it, but couldn't find one.

I haven't had to ask anyone out on a date for more than 40 years, and with the last couple of long-term relationships, *I* wasn't the one who instigated them, so I'm a bit out of practice.

I see a lot of *do's & don'ts* posted, but...

What would you say in the first email, that would intrigue someone to actually view your profile, and give you a better chance at a response (either positive or negative)

I certainly welcome any response, especially seeing that many on here have been members for quite awhile.

If this has already been discussed, if anyone could point me to the thread, I'd be eternally grateful. Thanks

MOST of the time asking to see their boobs or if they want to fusk isn't a good idea.

Probably save that for the third email, right?

Maybe. Just go with your gut. Sometimes you might have to wait for the 4th email.

we have email here?

Ya, it's that little thing at the top where scammers from Nigeria ask for your bank info.

rusty don't listen to him, he'll get ya in trouble, lead ya astray!!!

when i send a first email it's generally because of something in their profile or a post that has peaked my interest, so that would be subject

i know guys don't read profiles...generally speaking (it is my male friends who tell me that) so maybe read the profile, see if there is a common interest

your making a good move coming in the forum, welcome

Hey! I always read profiles first before replying to messages.

Rusty, don't listen to her. I'd never lead anybody astray.

my bad

i thought you told him that asking
to see their boobs IS a good idea

humble apologies sir

My first EVER sent email try's,,,,lol

were like,,,HI,,,just wanted to let you know I really thing your cute.



some replied back,,some didn't?


Then I stopped trying,,and only wrote to ones who I knew from the forums.

and with them,,we relatd as to what their posts were on or about...


Now,,,I can write to anyone and not feel arkward about doing that,,,but,,hey,,I been here doing that now for five years,,,so I BETTER have an idea as to speaking in the emails..

First,,use spellcheck,,always,,ladies seem to think you NOT SMART if you can't spell,,,lol

second is why do YOU want to write her? What caught your eye or mind?
THEN TELL ER THAT,,,its honest and its the real reason behind your email,,,TRUTH goes far with everyone..

Third,,never give just one word or two,,,,take the time to show them,,your really wanting to talk with them,,,not just passing through one night on here.

Now its allin YOUR imaginations to be,,,funny,,sad,,,wanting,,needing or a mix of all them..?

MOST willreply to any Gentlemens real message to have sent them,unless your like really making them feel your maybe a mental case,,,lol

Panting is just NOT COOL,,,,lol

Keep it real,,keep it simple and short...

and see if they reply back,,,IF they do,,take from THAT and build on what their respones was back to you..

TRY and be YOU,,but try and be the best you,,with your wit,,and your feelings,,,,it should return another and another,,but time on here being seen in the forums,,REALLY HELPS YOU TO BE KNOWN,,,

Good Luck and welcome aboard the nut shack,,,,,lol

I do read the profiles and am more often than not, piqued by something the person wrote.

I just don't know if a simple "Hi, I read your profile and would like to know more. If you take a peek at *my* profile and see anything of interest, please let me know"

Or pick something from their profile that you found of interest and use *that* as an ice-breaker. "Hi, I see you like camping. I've done a fair bit of camping as well... is there a special place you like more than others?"

Know what I mean? Would you discard the simple "Hi, check me out and we'll chat" without even looking at the profile?

Any emails I've received first... we're of a simple nature, but I've read on other dating sites that most women would simply delete the message if it didn't peak their interest

SOMETIMES it does work coming straight out and asking that (or more). So I'm told, anyway.......

thanks for the responses, they really help

I can't believe that at 63, I'm *asking* for dating advice! LOL

I also found that trying to be funny in an email, doesn't always turn out to *be* funny.

and thanks ladylid... but I was pretty certain *that* would be a *very bad* thing to do in a first email LOL

scammers???? you mean i haven’t won all of those lottery’s i never entered?
you sir are the bearer of bad news!

Well, I'm sure you won a couple of them. Like the one where you have to first send a money order for $55,000 to the Dominacan Republic for "taxes and handling".

I read this whole thing 4 times... there is a LOT of wisdom in those lines... Thanks iam

gearhead, i didn't think you were serious

messin with ya

i've had guys bring up body parts in the first couple emails
it is a turn off

yeah, to each his own, i don't give a ****

She's messing with me..... Now you did it! I'm going home and telling my Mommy! *MOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOMMMMMMMMMMMMMM. She's being mean to meeeeeeeeeeee!*

Yeah, quite a few people have told me that they've gotten first emails like that, and well, so far they'be all told me that the only thing gained was an instant 'Block'.

see... now *that* really bugs me

it's hard enough getting up the nerve to even *send* that first email... without a bunch of dimwits having already wrecked, or at least diminished any chance of someone believing I *could* actually be a gentleman.

I don't doubt for a minute that some have sent emails like that... but...

sheesh