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| Topic: Needing someone to hold | |
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For a year after my ex and I split I felt so alone and desperately wanted someone to lean on and someone to hold me and tell me everything was going to be ok. I wanted that so much I was willing to date anyone that came along which only caused more problems. But as time went on I became stronger and learned to take care of myself. Now I'm at the point where I could not be with anyone because I'm just too used to bring alone. I like my independence and my freedom and I could not give that up. Yep and I feel the same way.  Yeah, its not something I planned. Just kind of happened. I didn't plan it either. Just bad life experiences. I am quite happy being me all by myself, but will never believe I can't have what I've always wanted...just a matter of meeting the right person  I just find being in a relationship too phyiscally and mentally draining. Every guy I met has stressed me out to the point of being sick. I am also tired of the mental and physical abuse from guys because they can't cope with life. I have no desire to become a punching bag anymore. I just don't have the energy to give a relationship; to spend time with a person, to care about how their day went, to cuddle, to have discussions, or even have sex anymore. I am so tired; so damn tired of the whole situation. Ditto. Well, I am glad to know that I am not alone in my thinking. I just think life is stressful enough without having to come home to even more stress. |
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The moon is quite spectacular here tonight! Wish I had that special someone here to enjoy it with. Our loneliness will make togetherness that much sweeter! I gots 2 pibbles (pit bulls) to cuddle though! I love animals, but we only have a turtle a snake and two bunnies. The turtle is cold and wet, the snake will coil around you quiet happily but he isnt that loving, he just pokes his tongue out all over you and tries to go down your shirt. The bunnies are cuddly How could you stop at having only 2 bunnies??? especially on a night with the first warm breeze of the summer, under the heavy scent of the eucaliptus trees and the star-studded firmament above? I mean, bunnies are people too. They auto-regenerate. 2. Forever. Never any more than 2? Amazing. I think it must be two boys, or two girls, cause they sure aint breeedin more
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For a year after my ex and I split I felt so alone and desperately wanted someone to lean on and someone to hold me and tell me everything was going to be ok. I wanted that so much I was willing to date anyone that came along which only caused more problems. But as time went on I became stronger and learned to take care of myself. Now I'm at the point where I could not be with anyone because I'm just too used to bring alone. I like my independence and my freedom and I could not give that up. Yep and I feel the same way. Yeah, its not something I planned. Just kind of happened. I didn't plan it either. Just bad life experiences. I am quite happy being me all by myself, but will never believe I can't have what I've always wanted...just a matter of meeting the right person I just find being in a relationship too phyiscally and mentally draining. Every guy I met has stressed me out to the point of being sick. I am also tired of the mental and physical abuse from guys because they can't cope with life. I have no desire to become a punching bag anymore. I just don't have the energy to give a relationship; to spend time with a person, to care about how their day went, to cuddle, to have discussions, or even have sex anymore. I am so tired; so damn tired of the whole situation. Ditto. I felt that way not so long ago! I realized for me that it was best to let go and not allow my exs the satisfaction of "ruining me". I love men and will always love men. I will heal and give my heart to someone better next round! |
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For a year after my ex and I split I felt so alone and desperately wanted someone to lean on and someone to hold me and tell me everything was going to be ok. I wanted that so much I was willing to date anyone that came along which only caused more problems. But as time went on I became stronger and learned to take care of myself. Now I'm at the point where I could not be with anyone because I'm just too used to bring alone. I like my independence and my freedom and I could not give that up. Yep and I feel the same way. Yeah, its not something I planned. Just kind of happened. I didn't plan it either. Just bad life experiences. I am quite happy being me all by myself, but will never believe I can't have what I've always wanted...just a matter of meeting the right person I just find being in a relationship too phyiscally and mentally draining. Every guy I met has stressed me out to the point of being sick. I am also tired of the mental and physical abuse from guys because they can't cope with life. I have no desire to become a punching bag anymore. I just don't have the energy to give a relationship; to spend time with a person, to care about how their day went, to cuddle, to have discussions, or even have sex anymore. I am so tired; so damn tired of the whole situation. Ditto. Well, I am glad to know that I am not alone in my thinking. I just think life is stressful enough without having to come home to even more stress. Sounds like you haven't found anyone that loves you for who you are. |
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Just to contribute to this, you could think of it as: being ok alone and taking care of yourself as one level of strength. There are some people who can't even do that. Being able to handle the stress of a relationship as the next level of strength. However, I don't mean dealing with abuse and punching and someone who can't do thier part. But if you can take care of yourself, and be there for another person's needs to feel loved and share the good times and difficulties of of both lives, then you have done well!! I've seen a lot of bad relationships that are, yes, mostly the guys fault. But we are not all abusive, selfish, or extra needy. There are better things out there than you realize. Don't give up :)
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Edited by
Scorpio_WJR
on
Tue 05/17/11 02:02 PM
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I have never been a punching bag for anyone. Nor do I consider myself damaged. Or in need for finding the "right" one. I'm not sure why anyone would think that this is something I need to "fix".
I'm really happy being alone. I guess you will all just have to take my word for that.  |
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yea get that feeling after few drinks lol
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For a year after my ex and I split I felt so alone and desperately wanted someone to lean on and someone to hold me and tell me everything was going to be ok. I wanted that so much I was willing to date anyone that came along which only caused more problems. But as time went on I became stronger and learned to take care of myself. Now I'm at the point where I could not be with anyone because I'm just too used to bring alone. I like my independence and my freedom and I could not give that up. Yep and I feel the same way. Yeah, its not something I planned. Just kind of happened. I didn't plan it either. Just bad life experiences. I am quite happy being me all by myself, but will never believe I can't have what I've always wanted...just a matter of meeting the right person I just find being in a relationship too phyiscally and mentally draining. Every guy I met has stressed me out to the point of being sick. I am also tired of the mental and physical abuse from guys because they can't cope with life. I have no desire to become a punching bag anymore. I just don't have the energy to give a relationship; to spend time with a person, to care about how their day went, to cuddle, to have discussions, or even have sex anymore. I am so tired; so damn tired of the whole situation. Ditto. Well, I am glad to know that I am not alone in my thinking. I just think life is stressful enough without having to come home to even more stress. Sounds like you haven't found anyone that loves you for who you are. Those are hard to find! The vast majority of people male & female don't cope with stress well and stay far too busy trying to either run or fix someone elses life that they do not take care of their own. I just still believe there are good, well-balanced, supportive people left in the world that do not try to control or change you! I may be wrong...IDK, believing comes from the heart and when we get hurt it is only natural to want to protect it
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For a year after my ex and I split I felt so alone and desperately wanted someone to lean on and someone to hold me and tell me everything was going to be ok. I wanted that so much I was willing to date anyone that came along which only caused more problems. But as time went on I became stronger and learned to take care of myself. Now I'm at the point where I could not be with anyone because I'm just too used to bring alone. I like my independence and my freedom and I could not give that up. Yep and I feel the same way. Yeah, its not something I planned. Just kind of happened. I didn't plan it either. Just bad life experiences. I am quite happy being me all by myself, but will never believe I can't have what I've always wanted...just a matter of meeting the right person I just find being in a relationship too phyiscally and mentally draining. Every guy I met has stressed me out to the point of being sick. I am also tired of the mental and physical abuse from guys because they can't cope with life. I have no desire to become a punching bag anymore. I just don't have the energy to give a relationship; to spend time with a person, to care about how their day went, to cuddle, to have discussions, or even have sex anymore. I am so tired; so damn tired of the whole situation. Ditto. Well, I am glad to know that I am not alone in my thinking. I just think life is stressful enough without having to come home to even more stress. Sounds like you haven't found anyone that loves you for who you are. Nope, and I never will especially at my age. |
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For a year after my ex and I split I felt so alone and desperately wanted someone to lean on and someone to hold me and tell me everything was going to be ok. I wanted that so much I was willing to date anyone that came along which only caused more problems. But as time went on I became stronger and learned to take care of myself. Now I'm at the point where I could not be with anyone because I'm just too used to bring alone. I like my independence and my freedom and I could not give that up. Yep and I feel the same way. Yeah, its not something I planned. Just kind of happened. I didn't plan it either. Just bad life experiences. I am quite happy being me all by myself, but will never believe I can't have what I've always wanted...just a matter of meeting the right person I just find being in a relationship too phyiscally and mentally draining. Every guy I met has stressed me out to the point of being sick. I am also tired of the mental and physical abuse from guys because they can't cope with life. I have no desire to become a punching bag anymore. I just don't have the energy to give a relationship; to spend time with a person, to care about how their day went, to cuddle, to have discussions, or even have sex anymore. I am so tired; so damn tired of the whole situation. Ditto. Well, I am glad to know that I am not alone in my thinking. I just think life is stressful enough without having to come home to even more stress. Sounds like you haven't found anyone that loves you for who you are. Those are hard to find! The vast majority of people male & female don't cope with stress well and stay far too busy trying to either run or fix someone elses life that they do not take care of their own. I just still believe there are good, well-balanced, supportive people left in the world that do not try to control or change you! I may be wrong...IDK, believing comes from the heart and when we get hurt it is only natural to want to protect it I agree. I don't think it would be so bad if this was an isolated incident but it just keeps happening and each time I lose more of my heart that I just have nothing to give. |
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Just to contribute to this, you could think of it as: being ok alone and taking care of yourself as one level of strength. There are some people who can't even do that. Being able to handle the stress of a relationship as the next level of strength. However, I don't mean dealing with abuse and punching and someone who can't do thier part. But if you can take care of yourself, and be there for another person's needs to feel loved and share the good times and difficulties of of both lives, then you have done well!! I've seen a lot of bad relationships that are, yes, mostly the guys fault. But we are not all abusive, selfish, or extra needy. There are better things out there than you realize. Don't give up :) I have had 30 years of experience of this crap. I think it is time to give up. Its killing me physically and mentally. My health is worth more to me than love. |
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I just find being in a relationship too phyiscally and mentally draining. Every guy I met has stressed me out to the point of being sick. I am also tired of the mental and physical abuse from guys because they can't cope with life. I have no desire to become a punching bag anymore. I just don't have the energy to give a relationship; to spend time with a person, to care about how their day went, to cuddle, to have discussions, or even have sex anymore. I am so tired; so damn tired of the whole situation. Ditto. Well, I am glad to know that I am not alone in my thinking. I just think life is stressful enough without having to come home to even more stress. Sounds like you haven't found anyone that loves you for who you are. Nope, and I never will especially at my age. Never say never, that is usually when things happen!  Just relax and enjoy the life you have. Never know who will drop in to visit - or not...
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I just find being in a relationship too phyiscally and mentally draining. Every guy I met has stressed me out to the point of being sick. I am also tired of the mental and physical abuse from guys because they can't cope with life. I have no desire to become a punching bag anymore. I just don't have the energy to give a relationship; to spend time with a person, to care about how their day went, to cuddle, to have discussions, or even have sex anymore. I am so tired; so damn tired of the whole situation. Ditto. Well, I am glad to know that I am not alone in my thinking. I just think life is stressful enough without having to come home to even more stress. Sounds like you haven't found anyone that loves you for who you are. Nope, and I never will especially at my age. Never say never, that is usually when things happen! Just relax and enjoy the life you have. Never know who will drop in to visit - or not... Ah the eternal optimist. I am relaxed and do enjoy life; well once I get feeling better. Thanks. 
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I just find being in a relationship too phyiscally and mentally draining. Every guy I met has stressed me out to the point of being sick. I am also tired of the mental and physical abuse from guys because they can't cope with life. I have no desire to become a punching bag anymore. I just don't have the energy to give a relationship; to spend time with a person, to care about how their day went, to cuddle, to have discussions, or even have sex anymore. I am so tired; so damn tired of the whole situation. Ditto. Well, I am glad to know that I am not alone in my thinking. I just think life is stressful enough without having to come home to even more stress. Sounds like you haven't found anyone that loves you for who you are. Nope, and I never will especially at my age. Never say never, that is usually when things happen! Just relax and enjoy the life you have. Never know who will drop in to visit - or not... Ah the eternal optimist. I am relaxed and do enjoy life; well once I get feeling better. Thanks.  
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I just find being in a relationship too phyiscally and mentally draining. Every guy I met has stressed me out to the point of being sick. I am also tired of the mental and physical abuse from guys because they can't cope with life. I have no desire to become a punching bag anymore. I just don't have the energy to give a relationship; to spend time with a person, to care about how their day went, to cuddle, to have discussions, or even have sex anymore. I am so tired; so damn tired of the whole situation. Ditto. Well, I am glad to know that I am not alone in my thinking. I just think life is stressful enough without having to come home to even more stress. Sounds like you haven't found anyone that loves you for who you are. Nope, and I never will especially at my age. Never say never, that is usually when things happen! Just relax and enjoy the life you have. Never know who will drop in to visit - or not... Ah the eternal optimist. I am relaxed and do enjoy life; well once I get feeling better. Thanks. I hope you find the girl you are seeking. 
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Ever have a night where you just wish you had someone to hold under the stars? Someone just to make you feel like everything was OK, even just for a moment? Yeah, me neither. Just wondering... Nope; that is what my teddy bear is for.  I can live without the teddy holding me. Sure beats the alternative of having some abusive man hurting me. |
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Edited by
Atlantis75
on
Wed 05/18/11 12:27 AM
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I just find being in a relationship too phyiscally and mentally draining. Every guy I met has stressed me out to the point of being sick. I am also tired of the mental and physical abuse from guys because they can't cope with life. I have no desire to become a punching bag anymore. I just don't have the energy to give a relationship; to spend time with a person, to care about how their day went, to cuddle, to have discussions, or even have sex anymore. I am so tired; so damn tired of the whole situation. The worst part is, when you nicely ask them "please let me be for a while! Please don't ask me more questions, I can't answer them and I don't even like these questions! And then they won't listen and keep going at me. And then they get upset over it, because they don't want to listen and then I'm gonna say something mean to shake them off and finally they let you be. It would be so nice to fine someone who lets me be and do my stuff and doesn't bother me with too many questions and make up stories or accuse me of something or get jealous over nothing. It's like I'm constantly explaining myself, like a criminal suspect at the trial. That last sentence is my whole basically. That's how I feel like. 
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I just find being in a relationship too phyiscally and mentally draining. Every guy I met has stressed me out to the point of being sick. I am also tired of the mental and physical abuse from guys because they can't cope with life. I have no desire to become a punching bag anymore. I just don't have the energy to give a relationship; to spend time with a person, to care about how their day went, to cuddle, to have discussions, or even have sex anymore. I am so tired; so damn tired of the whole situation. The worst part is, when you nicely ask them "please let me be for a while! Please don't ask me more questions, I can't answer them and I don't even like these questions! And then they won't listen and keep going at me. And then they get upset over it, because they don't want to listen and then I'm gonna say something mean to shake them off and finally they let you be. It would be so nice to fine someone who lets me be and do my stuff and doesn't bother me with too many questions and make up stories or accuse me of something or get jealous over nothing. It's like I'm constantly explaining myself, like a criminal suspect at the trial. That last sentence is my whole basically. That's how I feel like. Atlantis, where have you been.  Who have you been talking to. Why have you taken so long. You where with someone wherent you  Thats what my ex was like.. |
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Just to contribute to this, you could think of it as: being ok alone and taking care of yourself as one level of strength. There are some people who can't even do that. Being able to handle the stress of a relationship as the next level of strength. However, I don't mean dealing with abuse and punching and someone who can't do thier part. But if you can take care of yourself, and be there for another person's needs to feel loved and share the good times and difficulties of of both lives, then you have done well!! I've seen a lot of bad relationships that are, yes, mostly the guys fault. But we are not all abusive, selfish, or extra needy. There are better things out there than you realize. Don't give up :) I have had 30 years of experience of this crap. I think it is time to give up. Its killing me physically and mentally. My health is worth more to me than love. Me too, but there are still some genuine blokes out there, |
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