Do you believe it takes two to ruin a relationship and that no one is the victim?

no. nice people get involved with azzholes all the time

all is fair in love & war

Since it takes two to have a relationship.... yep.

I am not sure.
I can hoestly say that my first marraige was both our faults, two young kids who had no idea what we where doing..
My second lasted 15 years and I had absolutely no idea what happened or where it went wrong, He was a great guy who after 5 years got mised up with horrid things that turned him into someone different. He was abusive but really really sorry, he thought we where wonderful but still, hurt us mentally and physically constantly.

He said we made him happy and had no idea why he was how he was..
He told everyone how wonderful we where and everyong thought we had th perfect marraige,

So I guess to me every relationship is different, some fall apart from neglect, some from people who just are not suited, and some just will never make it, but no I dont think it is always both peoples fault..

I think it can take one to ruin it, but then again, it's kinda hard not to blame yourself for being foolish enough not to know better.

Hate is not the opposite of love...

Indifference is.

Exactly. Everyone I've ever been with has been a cheater. My cousin told me that it's partly my fault because I must be doing something to cause all my boyfriends to cheat.

your cousin may have a point. being an enabler could be one reason your relationships fail. then again you could be getting with azzholes. to test the theory, lets get together

On the note of cheating... I've been cheated on twice, and I will never take the blame for having any part of the failure in those relationships. They made thier bed, no pun intended, they get to sleep in the one riddled with consequences of thier actions. Nobody deserves to be cheated on, and there is no excuse on this planet that will help me believe otherwise...

no, it takes two to make an 'us'

only one to turn it back into a 'me'

Maybe you're NOT doing something which is why they feel the need to cheat! ONLY KIDDING!!!!!!

Oh great I have had 3 people cheat.. I must be really doing something wrong.

Absolutely accurate.

nope, one can do a smashing good job all by themselves.

I kind of agree and also disagree with you all in a way. Although u might be right about it takes two to ruin a relationship or it takes to build a relationship or in a relationship u have to meet the other person half way etc etc, sometimes it does work and sometimes it doesn't. Sometimes a man or woman might be in a relationship and no matter how nice they might be or how hard they try to save the relationship they still find everything going down hill. Men play games as well as women so u can't soley put the blame on one person. All i can say is that finding a good woman or a good man is all based on "LUCK."

Both people are responsible for a good relationship, so why do you want to blame one person for ruining a relationship?

If you attract an A-hole and you yourself are not an A-hole then you aren't a good match anyway. If he ruins the relationship then he is actually doing you a favor.

It might appear that the A-hole is to blame for ruining the relationship or breaking a promise by cheating or whatever.. but you are also to blame for getting involved with him in the first place.
(Bad judgement)

If you pay attention to your feelings and intuition, you can probably avoid such relationships in the future, unless you are just attracting that kind of person all the time. If you are, then you are certainly partly responsible. You should not always think that you are the victim unless you really want to be.

The law of attraction has a lot to do with this. Both people are co-creators of the relationship good or bad.

I stay away from blame, but I believe a relationship can be ruined by one persons actions.

similar to any broken promise or contract,, it only takes one to breach it,,,

It always depends on the situation. There is no absolute.

The answer to the OP's question is a definite NO, though people will always argue the point.

If something happens in a relationship that causes one to want to cheat, it begs the question: Why don't they just end the relationship? Somewhere along the line they made a one-sided decision. They have no leg to stand on for playing the blame game.

In a different situation, one person's failure or mistake may cause another to overreact. Maybe both are to blame there. It has to be taken on a case by case basis.

If someone has a history of being involved with a number of cheaters, then someone is bound to point it out. When it happens, maybe there is something that person is doing wrong, but they cannot be held accountable for the selfish decision his/her partner makes.

I think what DollFace's cousin was trying to point out (and maybe with bad form) is that the men the OP is attracted to are not the right type of men for her. Hence, she needs to figure out why she is attracted to that specific type in order to break the cycle. There are plenty of men out there who don't cheat. One of them is bound to be right for JustDollFace.

No, but it takes to to build it...

The same happened to me. Maybe the problem is that we ve been picking the wrong people. If so it is partly our fault!