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Topic: why so hard?
Veldt_Falsetto's photo
Fri 04/08/11 09:02 AM
Yeahhh, self esteem, what is this thing? Never heard of it...

Simonedemidova's photo
Fri 04/08/11 09:54 AM
I dont think you are ugly...dont listen to other people...every has their uniqueness. If you are funny like you say you are, i really doubt you will have problem meeting someone nice on this site. there is a ton of women...who value a good personality. Hopefully you will find someone in your area on here. Good Luck, best to keep posting in the forums...those are the ones who talk and listen.

no photo
Fri 04/08/11 10:24 AM
you have a beard sir.
you should have the most confidence here.
look at the other guys here;
no beards.
weak.
go visit thebeardly.com.
maybe that'll help.
(:

spegeln's photo
Fri 04/08/11 10:29 AM

I dont think you are ugly...dont listen to other people...every has their uniqueness. If you are funny like you say you are, i really doubt you will have problem meeting someone nice on this site. there is a ton of women...who value a good personality. Hopefully you will find someone in your area on here. Good Luck, best to keep posting in the forums...those are the ones who talk and listen.

Thanks for those kind words. I am starting to like this place... once again, tack!

no photo
Fri 04/08/11 10:31 AM
I agree with Simone. Besides beauty is in the eye of the beholder, so you never know, you could be really amazing in the eyes of the right person. I hope you find what you want.

spegeln's photo
Fri 04/08/11 10:32 AM

you have a beard sir.
you should have the most confidence here.
look at the other guys here;
no beards.
weak.
go visit thebeardly.com.
maybe that'll help.
(:


Ha ha...very funny! Maybe the beard will come back in style and who gets all the ladies then, yeah... hmmm, petty I shaved It all of yesterday for a date.


no photo
Fri 04/08/11 10:34 AM
you beard murderer.
D:

wux's photo
Fri 04/08/11 03:42 PM
I think RedLace got it for you.

This is what I get he told you, OP:

Water your plants. Shine your shoes. make your bed. prepare a meal and set the table, then clear off the mess. watch the news. Take a DVD out of the library. Talk to your greengrocer. nod at people who have accidental eye contact with you. If someone smiles at you, return it bravely. Do your work well, to the best of your abilities. Lower your expectations, and make realistic plans. Don't raise the bar for yourself too high. call mom. talk to your brother. go to the class reunion. raise your hat when the car goes past a church. go home for christmas and thanksgiving. buy nice presents for your family, and don't stinge on the price. Buy a cheap thing, but the best quality of its kind. dress up every week end and go to a singles' dance or to a casual "meetup" meeting. get invloved at church. organize a no-booze monopoloy party for your friends (could be brand new friends.)

Red Lace waters her plants, and they grow fast. You have to water your own soil (not pants,... erm, it did not come out that well) if nobody else does it. You are better than plants.

Water your own soil, grow, watch yourself grow and revel in your own growth.

I think that's what Red wanted to say, except she said it so much more simply and powerfully. I am an explainer, not a poet.

So. They say the teacher appears when the student is ready. When you will be a strong, healthy oak tree from your own self-watering, then you will have no problem meeting people.

Rome was not built in a day. And it was built one brick at a time.

Self esteem is not raised by any miracle. It needs to be built slowly, with care and with caring.

eileena9's photo
Fri 04/08/11 03:57 PM

As it happens, I think that this website could be the best possible place for you. Getting into the forums and rubbing cyber-bodyparts with a lot of people really does work! I've fallen in love maybe half a dozen times here. Some of that has come back to me.

Why is it so hard? People have been asking that question for a thousand years. It just is. There is something to be gained here

-Art


Hey Art!!! Stop getting "hands-y" when you rub cyber-bodyparts!!! Next time you grab tush, I will grab yours!!:angry:




tongue2 tongue2

Jess642's photo
Fri 04/08/11 04:07 PM
I can't speak for Swedish women....culturally they may be different.

Also, perhaps you need to expand your social circle, go to places, join clubs, engage with others, that YOU like...no point joining the club scene if it is not your thing.

Stop intentionally looking, relax...be YOU...the you that you like.

Stop comparing....you aren't someone else...you are YOU....and your circle of established friends like you already, for YOU.


Enjoy your own company more....do more things that please you.


and when you least expect it....the person who sees you for you, and likes you, will appear.

Kematcheone's photo
Fri 04/08/11 08:23 PM
hey i got an idea how to make your self esteem higher get a webcam and a youtube channel. than post videos of stupid sh_t makes u and people laugh

spegeln's photo
Fri 04/08/11 10:44 PM

I can't speak for Swedish women....culturally they may be different.

Also, perhaps you need to expand your social circle, go to places, join clubs, engage with others, that YOU like...no point joining the club scene if it is not your thing.

Stop intentionally looking, relax...be YOU...the you that you like.

Stop comparing....you aren't someone else...you are YOU....and your circle of established friends like you already, for YOU.


Enjoy your own company more....do more things that please you.


and when you least expect it....the person who sees you for you, and likes you, will appear.


Thanks for the advice. That´s the thing I am very secure in me as a person, I think my moralcompass is working somewhat well and I stand by my opinions but try to be nice to people so maybe you are right but who knows... said the bitter old man!

I am me will be my new mantra...thanks!

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