Community > General Discussion

Topic: Indestructable Personality
Simonedemidova Joined Mon 11/15/10 Posts: 8952	Tue 03/22/11 08:08 PM
I have to disagree. Sometimes they are a little shy. You just have to coax them a little. I had this experience recently and he turned out to be funny and even responded with some sexy banter. I would be careful with the generalizations. One could only hope.... I do think it reflects back on the age thing that has been popping up in so many threads though...

InvictusV Joined Sun 11/23/08 Posts: 5282	Tue 03/22/11 08:15 PM
Sometimes you like certain people but when you converse with them... You get a lot of one word answers. . is this a lack of personality, a gaurded person....or does it mean they are not interested in you, or does it just mean they are really boring? I get intrigued but sometimes it can be a turn off. This applies to both friends and lovers....not just dating but knowing others in general What do you make of this situation. Well let me ask a specific question.. Are your conversations face to face or are they through text messaging/ instant messaging?

Simonedemidova Joined Mon 11/15/10 Posts: 8952	Tue 03/22/11 08:19 PM
It shouldnt really matter, a conversation is a conversation...why meet face to face if a person can not open up in the first place. That defeats the entire point of getting to know someone....

InvictusV Joined Sun 11/23/08 Posts: 5282	Tue 03/22/11 08:23 PM
It shouldnt really matter, a conversation is a conversation...why meet face to face if a person can not open up in the first place. That defeats the entire point of getting to know someone.... I disagree.. How well can you really get to know someone if your only contact is via text? You can type haha lol and ughhhhh all you want, but does that really give you the kind of feedback necessary to formulate an honest appraisal of their personality? I think not..

Simonedemidova Joined Mon 11/15/10 Posts: 8952	Tue 03/22/11 08:26 PM
It shouldnt really matter, a conversation is a conversation...why meet face to face if a person can not open up in the first place. That defeats the entire point of getting to know someone.... I disagree.. How well can you really get to know someone if your only contact is via text? You can type haha lol and ughhhhh all you want, but does that really give you the kind of feedback necessary to formulate an honest appraisal of their personality? I think not.. Um, that is exactly my point, duh. What is up with the one word answers...why cant a person, give a full answer, because those sound like pity answers, i am just giving you the acknowledgement you seek answers...

msharmony Joined Mon 08/31/09 Posts: 61041	Tue 03/22/11 08:26 PM
Sometimes you like certain people but when you converse with them... You get a lot of one word answers. . is this a lack of personality, a gaurded person....or does it mean they are not interested in you, or does it just mean they are really boring? I get intrigued but sometimes it can be a turn off. This applies to both friends and lovers....not just dating but knowing others in general What do you make of this situation. it could be any of the above lacking personality - probably if that is how they speak with MOST people MOST of the time a guarded person - probably if you see them speaking more fluently with those closest to them disinterested in the conversation - probably if there are times when they do engage with you and others when they dont disinterested in the person - probably if that person notices those one word answers seem to ONLY happen to them

Simonedemidova Joined Mon 11/15/10 Posts: 8952	Tue 03/22/11 08:35 PM
Sometimes you like certain people but when you converse with them... You get a lot of one word answers. . is this a lack of personality, a gaurded person....or does it mean they are not interested in you, or does it just mean they are really boring? I get intrigued but sometimes it can be a turn off. This applies to both friends and lovers....not just dating but knowing others in general What do you make of this situation. it could be any of the above lacking personality - probably if that is how they speak with MOST people MOST of the time a guarded person - probably if you see them speaking more fluently with those closest to them disinterested in the conversation - probably if there are times when they do engage with you and others when they dont disinterested in the person - probably if that person notices those one word answers seem to ONLY happen to them Those would be good insights to take note of if you were able to engage in person with them frequently and they allowed you into their personal lives where they could actually be observed amongst their comfort zone... But lets say you meet someone via a blind date, or online...how could you possibly make those judgements... I am confused how so many people on here are falling in the long distance love relationships....when their only communication would be online or texts. . that would be a strong indicator they are communicating well with one another...but then again, perhaps they are visiting one another pretty frequently as well. who knows.

Atlantis75 Joined Wed 12/03/08 Posts: 8581	Tue 03/22/11 08:35 PM
Sometimes you like certain people but when you converse with them... You get a lot of one word answers. . is this a lack of personality, a gaurded person....or does it mean they are not interested in you, or does it just mean they are really boring? I get intrigued but sometimes it can be a turn off. This applies to both friends and lovers....not just dating but knowing others in general What do you make of this situation. Somehow the title is misleading. I was expecting a different set of questions an discussions. The ones you have to really be concerned are those, who will actually reply, but instead of answering your questions, they go talk about something else. Actually, those people know exactly what you were asking and probably could answer it, but they turn the table around with a hidden motive, that has yet to be revealed.

InvictusV Joined Sun 11/23/08 Posts: 5282	Tue 03/22/11 08:35 PM
It shouldnt really matter, a conversation is a conversation...why meet face to face if a person can not open up in the first place. That defeats the entire point of getting to know someone.... I disagree.. How well can you really get to know someone if your only contact is via text? You can type haha lol and ughhhhh all you want, but does that really give you the kind of feedback necessary to formulate an honest appraisal of their personality? I think not.. Um, that is exactly my point, duh. What is up with the one word answers...why cant a person, give a full answer, because those sound like pity answers, i am just giving you the acknowledgement you seek answers... Text messaging is an informal, basic means of communication. Do I really want to type a paragraph using my iphone to reply to "how's it going"? UH..NO Text messaging is impersonal and not a reliable means to convey personality.

Mayhem_J Joined Mon 07/21/08 Posts: 14265	Tue 03/22/11 08:40 PM
It shouldnt really matter, a conversation is a conversation...why meet face to face if a person can not open up in the first place. That defeats the entire point of getting to know someone.... I disagree.. How well can you really get to know someone if your only contact is via text? You can type haha lol and ughhhhh all you want, but does that really give you the kind of feedback necessary to formulate an honest appraisal of their personality? I think not.. Um, that is exactly my point, duh. What is up with the one word answers...why cant a person, give a full answer, because those sound like pity answers, i am just giving you the acknowledgement you seek answers... Text messaging is an informal, basic means of communication. Do I really want to type a paragraph using my iphone to reply to "how's it going"? UH..NO Text messaging is impersonal and not a reliable means to convey personality. Texting may be informal....but say you live no where close to this person and are in a different time zone. Sometimes a quick little text conversation can keep you in touch. Replying with one word answers makes it look like your not interested. And if you feel you need to express yourself more...simply reply with a "call me when your free, too much to text". All though it seems that may be to much for some people.

Simonedemidova Joined Mon 11/15/10 Posts: 8952	Tue 03/22/11 08:45 PM
It shouldnt really matter, a conversation is a conversation...why meet face to face if a person can not open up in the first place. That defeats the entire point of getting to know someone.... I disagree.. How well can you really get to know someone if your only contact is via text? You can type haha lol and ughhhhh all you want, but does that really give you the kind of feedback necessary to formulate an honest appraisal of their personality? I think not.. Um, that is exactly my point, duh. What is up with the one word answers...why cant a person, give a full answer, because those sound like pity answers, i am just giving you the acknowledgement you seek answers... Text messaging is an informal, basic means of communication. Do I really want to type a paragraph using my iphone to reply to "how's it going"? UH..NO Text messaging is impersonal and not a reliable means to convey personality. I think there is a lot to be said about a persons personality regardless of the tool they use to interpret it....as is this thread represents. There are many opinions being placed in here...that are not one word, and yet none of us are sitting in the same room, in the flesh...it is still just a conversation..I get what you say about text though, that can be cumbersome.

InvictusV Joined Sun 11/23/08 Posts: 5282	Tue 03/22/11 08:48 PM
It shouldnt really matter, a conversation is a conversation...why meet face to face if a person can not open up in the first place. That defeats the entire point of getting to know someone.... I disagree.. How well can you really get to know someone if your only contact is via text? You can type haha lol and ughhhhh all you want, but does that really give you the kind of feedback necessary to formulate an honest appraisal of their personality? I think not.. Um, that is exactly my point, duh. What is up with the one word answers...why cant a person, give a full answer, because those sound like pity answers, i am just giving you the acknowledgement you seek answers... Text messaging is an informal, basic means of communication. Do I really want to type a paragraph using my iphone to reply to "how's it going"? UH..NO Text messaging is impersonal and not a reliable means to convey personality. Texting may be informal....but say you live no where close to this person and are in a different time zone. Sometimes a quick little text conversation can keep you in touch. Replying with one word answers makes it look like your not interested. And if you feel you need to express yourself more...simply reply with a "call me when your free, too much to text". All though it seems that may be to much for some people. I agree, but it seems the OP is talking more about getting to know someone not just saying "Hi".

Simonedemidova Joined Mon 11/15/10 Posts: 8952	Tue 03/22/11 08:50 PM
It shouldnt really matter, a conversation is a conversation...why meet face to face if a person can not open up in the first place. That defeats the entire point of getting to know someone.... I disagree.. How well can you really get to know someone if your only contact is via text? You can type haha lol and ughhhhh all you want, but does that really give you the kind of feedback necessary to formulate an honest appraisal of their personality? I think not.. Um, that is exactly my point, duh. What is up with the one word answers...why cant a person, give a full answer, because those sound like pity answers, i am just giving you the acknowledgement you seek answers... Text messaging is an informal, basic means of communication. Do I really want to type a paragraph using my iphone to reply to "how's it going"? UH..NO Text messaging is impersonal and not a reliable means to convey personality. Texting may be informal....but say you live no where close to this person and are in a different time zone. Sometimes a quick little text conversation can keep you in touch. Replying with one word answers makes it look like your not interested. And if you feel you need to express yourself more...simply reply with a "call me when your free, too much to text". All though it seems that may be to much for some people. Thats another thing, "Call me when you're free" some people really enjoy that and others don't. Is that a sign of disinterest?

Simonedemidova Joined Mon 11/15/10 Posts: 8952	Tue 03/22/11 08:54 PM
It shouldnt really matter, a conversation is a conversation...why meet face to face if a person can not open up in the first place. That defeats the entire point of getting to know someone.... I disagree.. How well can you really get to know someone if your only contact is via text? You can type haha lol and ughhhhh all you want, but does that really give you the kind of feedback necessary to formulate an honest appraisal of their personality? I think not.. Um, that is exactly my point, duh. What is up with the one word answers...why cant a person, give a full answer, because those sound like pity answers, i am just giving you the acknowledgement you seek answers... Text messaging is an informal, basic means of communication. Do I really want to type a paragraph using my iphone to reply to "how's it going"? UH..NO Text messaging is impersonal and not a reliable means to convey personality. Texting may be informal....but say you live no where close to this person and are in a different time zone. Sometimes a quick little text conversation can keep you in touch. Replying with one word answers makes it look like your not interested. And if you feel you need to express yourself more...simply reply with a "call me when your free, too much to text". All though it seems that may be to much for some people. I agree, but it seems the OP is talking more about getting to know someone not just saying "Hi". That is exactly the OP question, how confusing is that....the question is ----does a one word answer reflect a symbol of disinterest or lack of personality....you however mention that to some it is just not convenient to type a paragraph on an Iphone. That is agreeable for sure...

Jeanniebean Joined Wed 01/30/08 Posts: 40028	Tue 03/22/11 09:02 PM
Sometimes you like certain people but when you converse with them... You get a lot of one word answers. . is this a lack of personality, a gaurded person....or does it mean they are not interested in you, or does it just mean they are really boring? I get intrigued but sometimes it can be a turn off. This applies to both friends and lovers....not just dating but knowing others in general What do you make of this situation. I didn't read the entire thread.. But there are two things... 1. Maybe they can't type or spell very good or are computer illiterate. 2. Maybe they are not confident in their intelligence level. I dated a guy who was the quiet mysterious type. I was eager to unwrap him and know what was on his mind. When I finally got him to open up... I was really disappointed. He was ignorant and prejudice and a cruel bully. I cracked the nut and it was rotten.

msharmony Joined Mon 08/31/09 Posts: 61041	Tue 03/22/11 09:02 PM
Sometimes you like certain people but when you converse with them... You get a lot of one word answers. . is this a lack of personality, a gaurded person....or does it mean they are not interested in you, or does it just mean they are really boring? I get intrigued but sometimes it can be a turn off. This applies to both friends and lovers....not just dating but knowing others in general What do you make of this situation. it could be any of the above lacking personality - probably if that is how they speak with MOST people MOST of the time a guarded person - probably if you see them speaking more fluently with those closest to them disinterested in the conversation - probably if there are times when they do engage with you and others when they dont disinterested in the person - probably if that person notices those one word answers seem to ONLY happen to them Those would be good insights to take note of if you were able to engage in person with them frequently and they allowed you into their personal lives where they could actually be observed amongst their comfort zone... But lets say you meet someone via a blind date, or online...how could you possibly make those judgements... I am confused how so many people on here are falling in the long distance love relationships....when their only communication would be online or texts. . that would be a strong indicator they are communicating well with one another...but then again, perhaps they are visiting one another pretty frequently as well. who knows. I guess it boils down to whether we feel the person is worth an investment of MORE time to find out,,,, we all have bad days, and sometimes they happen during those times we are giving a 'first impression', I dont think we should chalk people up on solely ONE interaction,,,

sweetestgirl11 Joined Fri 09/12/08 Posts: 30087	Tue 03/22/11 09:06 PM
It shouldnt really matter, a conversation is a conversation...why meet face to face if a person can not open up in the first place. That defeats the entire point of getting to know someone.... I disagree.. How well can you really get to know someone if your only contact is via text? You can type haha lol and ughhhhh all you want, but does that really give you the kind of feedback necessary to formulate an honest appraisal of their personality? I think not.. Um, that is exactly my point, duh. What is up with the one word answers...why cant a person, give a full answer, because those sound like pity answers, i am just giving you the acknowledgement you seek answers... Text messaging is an informal, basic means of communication. Do I really want to type a paragraph using my iphone to reply to "how's it going"? UH..NO Text messaging is impersonal and not a reliable means to convey personality. Texting may be informal....but say you live no where close to this person and are in a different time zone. Sometimes a quick little text conversation can keep you in touch. Replying with one word answers makes it look like your not interested. And if you feel you need to express yourself more...simply reply with a "call me when your free, too much to text". All though it seems that may be to much for some people. I agree, but it seems the OP is talking more about getting to know someone not just saying "Hi". That is exactly the OP question, how confusing is that....the question is ----does a one word answer reflect a symbol of disinterest or lack of personality....you however mention that to some it is just not convenient to type a paragraph on an Iphone. That is agreeable for sure... it is a sign that the topic is not one they wish to discuss, but it may not reflect anything negative toward you it can also indicate shyness

sweetestgirl11 Joined Fri 09/12/08 Posts: 30087	Tue 03/22/11 09:07 PM Edited by sweetestgirl11 on Tue 03/22/11 09:07 PM
sorry double post

josie68 Joined Mon 11/22/10 Posts: 6270	Wed 03/23/11 06:19 AM
I have no idea why people give one word answers, for me it is frustrating. Probably as frustrating as I am to them.. but I happily tell anyone anything they ask, hmmm and probably more than they ask if I start to ramble on, i always just took it that they wherent interested in me or didnt want me to know about them.. I havent really got it all worked out how to do the dating site things or even the dating things, but I had figured that ifyou where trying to get to know someone then you needed to talk. t thats just me, I like to share so would rather someone who holds nothing back and would talk to me about anything and everything.

singmesweet Joined Mon 07/28/08 Posts: 26661	Wed 03/23/11 07:00 AM
It shouldnt really matter, a conversation is a conversation...why meet face to face if a person can not open up in the first place. That defeats the entire point of getting to know someone.... I disagree.. How well can you really get to know someone if your only contact is via text? You can type haha lol and ughhhhh all you want, but does that really give you the kind of feedback necessary to formulate an honest appraisal of their personality? I think not.. Um, that is exactly my point, duh. What is up with the one word answers...why cant a person, give a full answer, because those sound like pity answers, i am just giving you the acknowledgement you seek answers... Text messaging is an informal, basic means of communication. Do I really want to type a paragraph using my iphone to reply to "how's it going"? UH..NO Text messaging is impersonal and not a reliable means to convey personality. No matter what way someone chooses to get to know someone, they need to put in the effort for it. I don't use texting to get to know someone new, as it just doesn't work well for me. But, if it's someone I know? I have absolutely no problem with it at all.