Humm well everyone thinks different to me it all depends on several things.

If someone I was seeing and he was on a site similar to this one and he still had on his profile he was looking for someone we have a problem. If he had only been on the site for a short time and was not active in the forums and staying due to friends then we have a problem. If they are using the excuse to stay to seek others or feels as if he is hiding something then we have a problem.....

With that said if it was those things I listed then yeah I would have to wonder why they are staying within a site that they really are not that involved with...........hummm anyone catching my drift if not then we have a problem.

As for me I have been here for a long time and I'm here due to the forums and have made and met many friends along the way... Considering that then I could see why someone would want to stay and post ect.......

There comes times within our lives that we must look at both sides and consider the feelings of another we have welcomed into our lives. I could see one getting all upset if they had been on the site for a long time and it was obvious it was only for friends and nothing more.......and someone wanted them to leave..

But it makes me wonder why it's such a issue to give up when that is not so and would make me wonder what their intentions really were.......JMO

My girl and I are on here. I wouldn't ask her to drop her account for any reason. She really enjoys the community and the fun she has on it.

I trust her implicitly. I actually enjoy reading her posts and the responses she gets. Some of them are really funny.

I know where her heart is and that is all that matters to me.

Maybe she just wants your attention solely on her. That would be a reasonable request. "Stop looking at that girl that walked by, look at me."

I agree with you Kim.. What is stated doesn't seem to match with the OP... If I met someone I wouldn't want to leave here.. But had I been with someone I wouldn't have found Mingle unless I wasn't happy and I was looking for "more"...

Things that make you go hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm....

I'm trying to understand your situation from an objective point of view. I've also read the posts of the other members and agree with some. Ok, let's try to gather up some givens first.

In your profile, you have the headline: "Wide open spaces need someone to share it with."

Yellowrose made a good point with her post. This sort of headline does not really justify your righteous indignation regarding your girlfriend's reaction. It explicitly gives one the impression that you're not with someone at the moment and you're trying to look for a partner. Stating further down in your profile that you're "just looking for friendship" does not necessarily negate the initial line you used.

Also in your profile are solo pictures of you. If you are really trying to assure your girl that you are just here for "friends", then why not upload a picture of you and your girlfriend together? Some couples actually do that here. It assures the other person that you are not hiding the partnership to anyone.

Third, you are a new member who joined us this month. While I welcome you to Mingle, it does strike me strange that you won't give up a dating site you barely have had the chance to know for your girl's peace of mind. I could understand you not wanting to give in to her request if you've been here for quite some time and have established strong ties with other people. But I certainly doubt that would hold true in your situation.

Another question in my mind is, why does she need to question you at all? Is it really because she is paranoid, like what other people are saying or is it because she knows something about you that makes her worry? What about your character makes her not trust you enough in a site like this?

Finally, I know that the internet is an amazing way of meeting people and making new friends, but you can also do that in sites that does not specifically cater to single people looking to date. Maybe you should take some time to honestly look at what your real motives are in joining and why you feel so torn about leaving. Be fair to yourself and to your girlfriend. :)

This is probably why the gf isn't happy with it, not because she is jealous or controlling



It actually stated looking for friendship and maybe more but was changed (I believe) when Mayhem made his post



good point. That never occurred to me



another good point



If I was in her shoes and saw what was said on the profile, I would be upset. If it only said "I have a girlfriend and not looking for anything but friendship and chatting in the forums" or something like that, then I would think it would just be paranoid JMO



sound advice IMO

I'm not saying people in relationships shouldn't be on here at all. Many enjoy chatting in the forums. I'm saying be honest with yourself, your girlfriend and any one you talk to on here.

If you are looking for more, then be honest with everyone.

Very well said Red.

I think the biggest issue for the girlfriend is that he is new here. What is he looking for on an Internet dating site? Women are very intuitive. I know most women in my life picked up on my behavior before I was even aware of what I was doing. There is something he is doing that bothers her other than being here. My guess, she believes he is ready to leave. She may leave him before he can hurt her.

I also agree with Yellowrose. If he is looking for a new relationship, he should be honest with her and himself. Don't string her along. They will both feel better for it. She will actually appreciate you more for being honest with her. Remember women's saying, "Men are Dogs." And for a lot of men that is true. Keeping a girlfriend until you find someone better is the definition of this saying.

Ok, If Anaconda asked me to leave this site, and we had talked about it and decided that he wasnt comfortable with mje being here, i would leave, however i would still stay in contact with my friends on here , but I would use facebook

How he feels would be more important than a web site

Guess the GF got her way <hehe>...proally threatened to break up with him. Excellent advice everyone!!

keywords, respect her wishes....

no I'm still here we worked out are issues and we are in it together, more open cause us together is just a friendship thing, she was trying to tie me down like we r married allready Gee Whizzz

yikes, embarrass her a lil more, she is probably gonna read that now...