100% FREE ONLINE DATING
sponsored links
Previous
| Topic: commitment, abandonment, or abuse? | |
|---|---|
|
|
|
@ MmmmHmmm, I do agree with you on marriage being harder to get into. I definitely think counseling really needs to be done. People apparently don't know how to argue anymore in a healthy way. I actually think classes need to be considered. Of course, I also feel this way having kids.
I think divorces need to be harder to get out of EXCEPT in cases of infidelity and abuse. |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
There are no absolutes except in cases of abuse (mental, physical, emotional, financial, etc.) which is zero tolerance. But with relationships in general I consider the "Emotional Bank Account Theory" There is money in the bank with every new friendship and sometimes you take money out but you got to put some back into it. But if one side of the relationship is only making withdraws...one day they will realize that there is nothing left and the relationship is finished. Am I making any sense here?? I think this is a Stephen Covey concept. In essence, yes, there can come a time to just walk away but until that time, in the absence of abuse, my friendships/relationships are unconditional. Commitment is a two way street. One could say that their spouse is married but not them. One could easily say that taking a commitment to the extreme might constitute being committed to an insane asylum. I am sure a lot of people have seen the movie, "Play Misty For Me". Nobody should be somebody's else's doormat. There is a reason for breech of contract; Its just good business. There is a good reason for taking inventories; Its just good business. Even the Constitution of the United States allows for being abolished if it isn't in the best interest of "We the people". I always try to encourage sanity when I can. Excellent answers ...  ... It gives me such hope that the answers I most resonate w/ here, came from the Men that answered ... Means a great deal to me, and says so much for the two of you ...  I am glad to hear that. Imagine King Henry the 8th's relief when he went against established religion to make divorce legal. You mean I don't have to have their heads chopped off to get away from them? I mean after you have their heads chopped off there is little chance of reconciliation. I mean sure you don't have to go through a long drawn out divorce proceedings and the embarrassment of your friends and neighbors because you two couldn't make it work when they can make their marriage work. Not to mention child support and who gets the kids. I mean in a legal fight the two opponents come out shaking hands before the actual fight and if one opponent who is knocked out is still able to will shake hands with the winner of the bout. Nolo Contrendre, what a wonderful thing. Just admit that they can't stand you and you can't stand them for whatever reason. You don't even having to ask if, "Can't we still be friends?" Nah, you just stay as far as you be away from them and vice versa. Then you can both just go your separate ways because that was what was happening before the divorce anyways. 
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
@ MmmmHmmm, I do agree with you on marriage being harder to get into. I definitely think counseling really needs to be done. People apparently don't know how to argue anymore in a healthy way. I actually think classes need to be considered. Of course, I also feel this way having kids. I think divorces need to be harder to get out of EXCEPT in cases of infidelity and abuse. Agree with what you are saying especially with arguing. I personally hate arguements and always try to discuss in a calm manner. I don't like yelling or calling names; or worse yet bringing up something that happened long ago to throw in someone's face but that seems to be the norm. My theory is if no one is hurt or killed, then discuss in a calmn manner. I would think especially as we get older we can be more mature rather than flying off the handle. Making divorces harder isn't going to save a marriage if one or both parties are unhappy but I agree counselling should be considered first and divorce as a last resort. |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
The ONLY reason for "sticking it out" is if both parties can TRULY move past it an grow from it. That is very rarely the case. Most of the time these incidences breach a trust that can never be earned back. |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
OH and marriage licenses should have to be renewed... Just sayin. |
|
|
|
|
