that a 'duck' really is just a 'duck'. Had to point out to the fella I've been dating that after a year and a half, we are really just friends...not significant others...not lovers. Good friends, for sure, but nothing more. Not my choice, but his. He hasn't behaved as if he was interested in me for months and months. Odd that he seemed so upset, but I think it was just letting go of the pipe dreams of something more. We had such hopes when we first met. At our age it, is hard to hang on to hope for one last chance at real love. Especially when love is so elusive to the young and beautiful. What are the chances for people at our age? He seemed very sad. It all has had me very sad, too, for a long time...but it doesn't change the fact that a 'duck' is just that...a 'duck'. Reality bites.

The sooner you realize that he's just a "duck" the faster you can move on to the next. Sounds like you are already there. Congrats and good luck!

TY...it still feels so sad, though...

You are a sweet lady, i enjoy reading your posts on the forums. You have quite a since of humor, any man would have to be out of his mind not to take a good look at you. You are very beautiful & kind woman.

AWWW.....LOU LOU....love is NOT just for the 'young n beautiful'. You sound like a sweet and wonderful person. You deserve the best. I believe you will find it too!

What's all this talk about ducks?

i was hoping for a good recipe but.....

I've actually been through this a few times at my age! And you're right, you just have to call it what it is. It took me a while to learn my lesson as I would often fall for guys I was very good friends with. We would try for something more and then one of us would have to call it a duck

want to come over for dinner?

BBQ Duck and Sauteed Shiitake Mushroom filled Blue Corn Pancakes with Habanero Sauce

Ingredients
For the Blue Corn Pancakes:

* 1/2 cup blue cornmeal or blue cornmeal
* 1/2 cup all-purpose flour
* 1 teaspoon baking powder
* Pinch salt
* 2 large eggs, beaten
* 1 cup whole milk
* 2 tablespoons honey
* 2 tablespoons unsalted butter, melted

For the Mesa BBQ sauce:

* 2 tablespoons canola oil
* 1 large Spanish onion, coarsely chopped
* 5 cloves garlic, coarsely chopped
* 3 cups canned plum tomatoes and juices, pureed
* 1 cup water
* 1/4 cup ketchup
* 1/4 cup red wine vinegar
* 1/4 cup Worcestershire sauce
* 3 tablespoons Dijon mustard
* 3 tablespoons dark brown sugar
* 2 tablespoon honey
* 1/4 cup molasses
* 3 tablespoons ancho chile powder
* 3 tablespoons pasilla chile powder
* 2 tablespoons pureed chipotle chiles in adobo
* Salt
* Freshly ground black pepper

For the Sauteed Shiitake Mushrooms:

* 3 tablespoons canola oil
* 3 shiitake mushrooms, caps removed and thinly sliced
* 2 shallots, finely chopped
* Salt
* Freshly ground black pepper

For the Habanero Sauce:

* 10 cups rich chicken stock
* 1 cup apple juice concentrate, thawed
* 3 tablespoons dark brown sugar
* 2 star anise
* 1 cinnamon stick
* 1/2 habanero pepper, coarsely chopped
* 1 tablespoon fennel seeds, toasted
* Salt
* Freshly ground black pepper

For the BBQ duck:

* 1 cup Mesa BBQ Sauce
* 6 duck legs, skin removed
* 3 cups chicken stock
* 1/2 cup Habanero Sauce
* 1 recipe Sauteed Shiitake Mushrooms
* 3 tablespoons coarsely chopped fresh cilantro leaves, plus more for garnish
* Salt
* Freshly ground black pepper

For the Blue Corn Pancakes:
Directions

Combine the cornmeal, flour, baking powder, salt in a medium bowl. In a separate bowl, combine the egg, milk, honey and melted butter, add to the dry ingredients and mix until combined. Let rest for 1 hour.

Place a 6-inch nonstick pan over high heat. Spray with cooking spray and reduce heat to medium. Ladle 2 ounces of the mixture into the pan, swirling to evenly coat the pan with the mixture. Cook pancake until just set on first side, approximately 1 minute. Flip over and cook for an additional 20 to 30 seconds. Remove to a plate and repeat all steps with the remaining mixture, stacking the pancakes and covering with foil to keep warm.
For the Habanero Sauce:

Place all ingredients in a large saucepan, place over high heat and reduce to 1 cup, approximately, 1 1/2 hours, stirring occasionally. Strain into a bowl and season with salt and pepper, to taste.
For the Mesa BBQ sauce:

Heat the oil over medium-high heat in a heavy-bottomed medium saucepan. Add the onions and cook until soft, 3 to 4 minutes. Add the garlic and cook for 1 minute. Add the tomatoes and water, bring to a boil and simmer for 10 minutes. Add the remaining ingredients and simmer for an additional 30 to 40 minutes until thickened, stirring occasionally.

Transfer the mixture to a food processor and puree until smooth, season with salt and pepper, to taste. Pour into a bowl and allow to cool at room temperature. Sauce will keep for 1 week in the refrigerator stored in a tightly sealed container.
For the Sauteed Shiitake Mushrooms:

Heat the oil in a large saute pan over high heat until shimmering. Add the mushrooms and cook until golden brown, add the shallots and cook for 2 minutes longer, season with salt and pepper, to taste.
For the BBQ duck:

Preheat oven to 325 degrees F.

Generously brush the duck legs with the BBQ sauce and place them in a baking pan. Pour stock and 1/2 cup of the habanero sauce around the legs. Cover the pan and place in the oven. Cook for 2 hours or until the meat begins to fall off the bone. Strain liquid and reserve.

Remove the duck from the braising liquid and let cool slightly. When the duck is cool enough to handle, shred the duck meat into bite-size pieces and discard bones. Cook the shredded meat and mushrooms with a 1/2 cup of the BBQ braising liquid in a saute pan over medium heat until heated through, add the cilantro and season with salt and pepper.
For assembly:

Mound 1/4 of the duck mixture in the center of each pancake. Fold the pancake over the filling to make a semi-circle and drizzle with the remaining habanero sauce. Garnish with chopped cilantro.

I think what is sad is how when we are younger we can feel snubbed when a member of the opposite sex asks if we can't be just friends. The older I get the more I value just friends. To me just friends is still a whole lot.

Maybe another night. I just read that you were on the toilet.

Shattered hopes are such a disappointment.

I'm sorry that the reality of the duck bit you.

You sure did find a duck recipe fast. lol

Thank you for your kindness...just so sad. I put my friends through so much worry a few years back when I was going through a divorce...hate to cause them a moments concern now. Sometimes you just have to tell someone how crummy you feel. |For those who wanted a recipe for duck, I've supplied a spicy one. Sorry, have no idea if it is any good. I come from a long line of women who are dreadful cooks. thanks, though...it made me chuckle...so Mangle2...

Oh, believe me...I truly value my friends. I owe them much more than I could ever, ever repay.

Yeah, I hear that about the value of friends. I am thankful for the friends who were there to pick up the pieces of what was me when a relationship failed.

Had me going there. I was hoping they didn't change the name to Mangle2.

Me. too...

there are books and statistics on this type of stuff

it is true, as we get older, the chances of meeting someone reduce...significantly after a certain age..and almost 0 after a certain other age

i know the age, but i won't say...cause it really doesn't matter what i say anyway

a statistic is not a person and it won't ever measure a persons heart...and if you have a good heart, then you have a good chance..of meeting someone with an equally good heart

roko