this is a good, and "pointed" post...

imho: Me? I am emotionally, spiritually, and physically independent of others. I do not rely on material things, external validation - or the news media to define who I am or what I do. I embrace my uniqueness and individuality to such an extent that I enjoy exploring who I am....

However, I am a work in progress, and I strive to become the person I want to be. I am not perfect, recognizing my flaws and prioritizing them as to what is most important for me to shape or change...

What is the secret? I don't know... what works for me? --> Introspection (the ability to take an objective "self inventory" of your traits in an honest and real way), strong will and character (to be able to modify your thinking and or behavior) - and ultimately the realization that on most all levels - doing so will make you a much, much happier person...

"Life is a journey, enjoy the ride" - unknown author...

$.02

I am alsways a work in progress... Since losing my husband and mom 3 yrs ago I have made many changes in my life..and I'm proud of my changes....Being very independent, I try to keep all negative people out of my life...that has been one really good change....feeling at peace within myself is another change I like...

I put myself on hold for a long time, but IM back now. I definitely value myself first, with the only exceptions having to do with my children's needs.

Men frequently validate their worth, and identify through employment, and through relationships to a lesser extent.

Society does foster some of this, our value is based on what we do or contribute to the group, or whether the 'group think' finds us attractive or not.

Being rejected by a spouse through the process of divorce can be quite traumatic to ones idea of self. It can be used as an opportunity for personal growth. The process of realizing that you have worth and value beyond you role as: wife/husband, mother/father sexual partner, provider, companion, the sense of belonging to a family group, is a difficult process.

Finding a relationship 'on the rebound' can be as equally painful when it falls apart too, because it's based on a extreme need to find worth in a relationship.


Yet if you take some time, chill out, find out more about yourself, accepting yourself for who and what you are right now at this point in your life. Let go of those old ideas, you can find yourself, and get to a better place inside yourself.

I actually discovered that when I was married, I allowed my "free spirit" self to sort of die (in a manner of speaking). I forgot who I was, and what it was that made me....well me. So, I honestly feel that through my divorce, I found out who I was again and now I am evolving everyday. To me, the divorce was well worth it because now I know who I am, what I want, and I found more of a purpose for my life. Yes, I am single, but I learned alot these past few years. I will never lose sight of who I am again, and I also know that when I do meet a woman, that she will have to accept me for me, and not do all she can to change me. Hell....I am special dang it, and I deserve to be me....not someone else's creation.

... As you impress and inspire me also, dear Golden One ...

These are some amazing and honestly heart felt posts. Thank you all very much. I think we may all be works in progress. But what beautiful work.

Were all a work in progress...anyone who isn't has stopped growing and that can't be good!

No-one can take your self worth from you....you have to freely give it.

and in saying that, you can take it back at any moment.

Chrissy.... be vigilant...everytime the naysayers in your head get yabbering on....CONSCIOUSLY tell them to STOP.

Elect a new committee member!...Get yourself a bulldyke, big mamma meanie into your head, and everytime the negative mob start up, get her to stomp on them...visualise it....


and giggle.

it works....promise.

Your value is immeasurable...it knows know limit....why be small, and play small, when the universe is so vast?


Be ALL of you.