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| Topic: Libido issues | |
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Maybe he's just not that attracted to her. It happened to me once with somebody before. If the sex isn't satsfying...why bother except for maintenance purposes. She could try certain things to spice up their sex life if she was willing.  No its a legitimate question. But if he does need her to do something specific to spice it up he needs to speak up. However he does not seem to feel there's a problem at all. He seems perfectly okay with sex once or twice a month. The stuff she has tried has had no affect on him. 
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Hi Ruth. Unfortunately my first thought on your post was that he might be going somewhere else to get what he needs. Not to say that your friend cannot give him what he wants but he might be someone that is concerned with the age difference if he doesn't think he is performing in the way he wants or she wants.
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If it is biologically induced, and not trauma resultant related, there are many nutrient deficiencies that may well be at play ...
... ZINC! This would be the first order of business. The legends of oysters as aphrodisiacs have this as their biological basis, as do many others. Give her the detailed list of food aphrodisiacs! There are MANY other nutrients, herbs and essential oils that could bolster his testosterone and sexual appetite, so drive. She could just tell him she's putting them both on a nutrient program. No need to detail as that is true and the amount of truth palatable to him! Seems less is more in this case. Hopefully there are no medications involved that are at source. That too would need to be reworked. Diabetes (undetected?) can also be a MAJOR influence here. |
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Hi Ruth. Unfortunately my first thought on your post was that he might be going somewhere else to get what he needs. Not to say that your friend cannot give him what he wants but he might be someone that is concerned with the age difference if he doesn't think he is performing in the way he wants or she wants. That crossed my mind too. |
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 If this guy works a lot, it could be a stress issue. There are medications and stuff like that out there that could help this guy.
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If this guy works a lot, it could be a stress issue. There are medications and stuff like that out there that could help this guy. He does work A LOT!  He always has.
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If it was ok then, and not now -- perhaps it is her issue and she is looking for an excuse to scratch her "six year itch"...
you only know one side of the story, usually there are two... food for thought... $.02 
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If it is biologically induced, and not trauma resultant related, there are many nutrient deficiencies that may well be at play ... ... ZINC! This would be the first order of business. The legends of oysters as aphrodisiacs have this as their biological basis, as do many others. Give her the detailed list of food aphrodisiacs! There are MANY other nutrients, herbs and essential oils that could bolster his testosterone and sexual appetite, so drive. She could just tell him she's putting them both on a nutrient program. No need to detail as that is true and the amount of truth palatable to him! Seems less is more in this case. Hopefully there are no medications involved that are at source. That too would need to be reworked. Diabetes (undetected?) can also be a MAJOR influence here. Thank you, I will give her these suggestions as I think she is looking for some kind of supplement to give him. |
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Personally I think there are more underlying problems with the totally marriage,that you as a friend don't know about and your friends not telling you.Sound like maybe a guilt issue from your friend.I'm not sure as the rest of us here, based on lack of information.
Truly she needs to come clean with her husband, as well he needs to open up.But I really think there is more to the story then your friend is telling you. (in the mean time, take her to a toy shop) thats not cheating but gets the job done.And it's safe sex....Please tell her good luck. |
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If this guy works a lot, it could be a stress issue. There are medications and stuff like that out there that could help this guy. He does work A LOT! He always has. That is what it is A lot of guys that work a lot have this issue. They are tired and/or stressed
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Jerry!!!, Jerry!!!, Jerry!!!
Quite the age difference too! Let alone medical and communication issues. |
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i guess i'd probably resort to just pushing him down on the couch and unzipping his pants. if he didn't get an erection after tonguing and squeezing him a bit, i'd think it were a physical problem and i'd talk to a doctor on his behalf (and maybe spike a little something in his drink).
otherwise, i'd most likely take it as that he were not physically attracted and/or aroused by me any longer and decide to either live with it, or live without it (or without him). |
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i guess i'd probably resort to just pushing him down on the couch and unzipping his pants. if he didn't get an erection after tonguing and squeezing him a bit, i'd think it were a physical problem and i'd talk to a doctor on his behalf (and maybe spike a little something in his drink). otherwise, i'd most likely take it as that he were not physically attracted and/or aroused by me any longer and decide to either live with it, or live without it (or without him). That's how I'd handle it, too.....I mean the situation.
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Time for a divorce.
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Time for a divorce.  You didn't even give me a chance to take back any of the advice here! How about we at least give em a week?
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Communication Breakdown.
You have to communicate with your spouse on everything. If there is no magic happening, you both need to sit down and discuss what the problem is. Besides that, what does his being "Hispanic" got to do with their communication problems? |
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Communication Breakdown. You have to communicate with your spouse on everything. If there is no magic happening, you both need to sit down and discuss what the problem is. Besides that, what does his being "Hispanic" got to do with their communication problems? i agree |
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Communication Breakdown. You have to communicate with your spouse on everything. If there is no magic happening, you both need to sit down and discuss what the problem is. Besides that, what does his being "Hispanic" got to do with their communication problems? That was her explanation to me for him being unwilling to talk about it. They are both from El Salvador. I believe someone in here already explained how men from different cultural backgrounds can sometimes be in regards to sex and communication with their wives. |
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Something has gone wrong...at his age he should be wanting some every night... sounds like trouble in paradise. Something else is going on..
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My friend is 27 and her husband is 43. She is very upset because she is not getting enough sex from him. They have been together for about 6 years. Prior to marraige they did not have sex. Once married he was only interested in sex a couple times a week. Now its down to a couple times a month. She feels she cannot talk to him about this. He is Hispanic and this is not something he would be willing to discuss. So, please post your advice here and I will give it to her. if you can't talk over your inner most thought with your partner the relationship is headed in the wrong direction.. communication is the key to keeping things going .if you lose that you have nothing to talk over and it just builds to somebody explodes..
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